Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Lord god, you are a cheapskate if you really think you should save $2.50 an hour by divvying it up per kid. Just split it.

Maybe I am a cheapskate? I'm a single mom raising two kids on a GS-9 salary. Brother makes over 300K. I didn't come here for your judgement. I came to get a response of what would be generally accepted. Maybe you should step off your high horse and realize that not everyone is in as stable a situation as you. We're also splitting food and tip. So yeah, paying per kid would save me probably close to $30-40 which is a lot for someone like me.

I have three kids and make over $300k. I don’t think it makes me a cheapskate to not offer to pick up the entire tab in a situation like this. He probably has more expenses than you since he has more kids. This year has been brutal on many people who are paying more for private, pods, etc than normal. His income is irrelevant without knowing his expenses

Are you serious???

I am absolutely serious. But maybe because my sister, who makes less than me, would never dream of expecting me to subsidize her because she can handle her finances. Our other sister and her husband probably makes twice a what my husband and I make and I wouldn’t expect her to subsidize us based on their income and would be insulted if she expected it. If you can’t afford a babysitter don’t hire one. Federal employees make good money, they can afford babysitters. The fact that the brother makes more does not mean he should give his sister charity.

I seriously can’t comprehend thy so many people think they are entitled to have other people pay for their luxuries.

Is this a one time thing. Like you all going out or on going like a nanny (NOT A SITTER)

If it’s one time eh I’d pay for my sister who makes way less. But if it was an on going nanny share situation- yes it would be split evenly. No one should have to provide you long term childcare

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Lord god, you are a cheapskate if you really think you should save $2.50 an hour by divvying it up per kid. Just split it.

Maybe I am a cheapskate? I'm a single mom raising two kids on a GS-9 salary. Brother makes over 300K. I didn't come here for your judgement. I came to get a response of what would be generally accepted. Maybe you should step off your high horse and realize that not everyone is in as stable a situation as you. We're also splitting food and tip. So yeah, paying per kid would save me probably close to $30-40 which is a lot for someone like me.

I have three kids and make over $300k. I don’t think it makes me a cheapskate to not offer to pick up the entire tab in a situation like this. He probably has more expenses than you since he has more kids. This year has been brutal on many people who are paying more for private, pods, etc than normal. His income is irrelevant without knowing his expenses

Are you serious???

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Lord god, you are a cheapskate if you really think you should save $2.50 an hour by divvying it up per kid. Just split it.

Maybe I am a cheapskate? I'm a single mom raising two kids on a GS-9 salary. Brother makes over 300K. I didn't come here for your judgement. I came to get a response of what would be generally accepted. Maybe you should step off your high horse and realize that not everyone is in as stable a situation as you. We're also splitting food and tip. So yeah, paying per kid would save me probably close to $30-40 which is a lot for someone like me.

I have three kids and make over $300k. I don’t think it makes me a cheapskate to not offer to pick up the entire tab in a situation like this. He probably has more expenses than you since he has more kids. This year has been brutal on many people who are paying more for private, pods, etc than normal. His income is irrelevant without knowing his expenses

I remember you posting the ad here. I applied and now see why I didn’t get a response. 25$ is extremely cheap-I currently make that for 1 infant. I would be extremely cautious of this “nanny” charging 5$ per child. Professional verifiable nanny’s don’t charge 25$ for 5 children. Good luck

$5 / kid per hour is pretty cheap. The two year old is more work and your brother has 3 so splitting it makes sense. I understand you have different financial situations but technically it's fair to split the cost. I question your brothers sense of decency though and I wouldn't want to spend time with him. Pay 2/5 if you must but don't share a sitter too often.

My goodness.

Sorry about all the mean responses OP. Don't know why.
Anyways, I'm a full-time nanny who does occasional evening care on an ad-hoc basis as well. Have had plenty of times where parents' friends/relatives come out of town and I watch extra kids. If the sitter is charging $25 for 5 and your brother isn't picking up the full tab, seems fair for you to pay $10. Wish you well!

Anonymous wrote:One sitter for 5 kids seems like a lot..if child is a toddler. This seems unsafe

Maybe you can’t look after 5 kids, most normal adults can.

Anonymous wrote:5 kids - 2 are mine, 3 are my brothers, mostly the same age though I have the youngest at 2yrs old. Sitter is charging $25 an hour for the 5 - do we divvy it up per kid or split it down the middle?

You have a two year old and should be paying more than your brother with three kids.

I was once roommates with a couple who used to leave me coins on my bedside table when they'd take a tablespoon of my jam from the fridge. Not kidding. After the second time it happened, I just put a jar in the front hall and told them to put whatever they wanted in there and we could donate it. They thought this was exceedingly generous.

At first, I thought they were insane. But other than this, they were lovely people who were just brought up differently.

No need to judge so harshly.

OP I think you should propose to your brother whatever you think is fair and have a conversation about it.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Lord god, you are a cheapskate if you really think you should save $2.50 an hour by divvying it up per kid. Just split it.

Maybe I am a cheapskate? I'm a single mom raising two kids on a GS-9 salary. Brother makes over 300K. I didn't come here for your judgement. I came to get a response of what would be generally accepted. Maybe you should step off your high horse and realize that not everyone is in as stable a situation as you. We're also splitting food and tip. So yeah, paying per kid would save me probably close to $30-40 which is a lot for someone like me.

Thinking of the OT thread about meanness on this board. OP sounds pretty hurt here at the relatively normal reaction that splitting per kid is cheapskate behavior. It is.
The fact that her brother is not offering to pick this up as he should given the details does not change the reality that in an “all things equal” situation it is nit picky to split the sitter cost per kid rather than per family.

In any normal situation, this should be split in the middle.

I am the person with 3 kids. I would probably pick up the whole sitter. Maybe other person can handle food and snacks.

Just like how some people ask about splitting a beach house and cost per person, per room, per kid, per day. I just don’t want to hang out with people to split costs like this. We have a seven figure income now but even when I was a poor student or making little, my friends and I did not split hairs. When I was the lower earner, I often got treated. Now we treat most of the time. Then we also have friends who are Uber rich and they always treat us too.

Your brother is a jerk for not paying for the whole thing. He is a cheapskate.

I would split in the middle.

I wouldn’t want to hang out with people who are this nitpicky with cost. Can’t imagine family doing this.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Lord god, you are a cheapskate if you really think you should save $2.50 an hour by divvying it up per kid. Just split it.

Maybe I am a cheapskate? I'm a single mom raising two kids on a GS-9 salary. Brother makes over 300K. I didn't come here for your judgement. I came to get a response of what would be generally accepted. Maybe you should step off your high horse and realize that not everyone is in as stable a situation as you. We're also splitting food and tip. So yeah, paying per kid would save me probably close to $30-40 which is a lot for someone like me.

Thinking of the OT thread about meanness on this board. OP sounds pretty hurt here at the relatively normal reaction that splitting per kid is cheapskate behavior. It is.
The fact that her brother is not offering to pick this up as he should given the details does not change the reality that in an “all things equal” situation it is nit picky to split the sitter cost per kid rather than per family.

Who is hosting and who had the relationship with the babysitter?

When we had a similar situation and dropped off our 2 kids with our friends 2 kids and her babysitter, we paid the cost of a babysitter for our 2 (and then they paid the extra $10 per hour or whatever for their kids). So we paid like $25 per hour and they paid $10.

When it’s my babysitter, we pay whatever hourly rate she wants and add about $50 because I know it’s hard for her to say no because we are regular clients, even if she doesn’t want more than our 2 kids.

I see that you are in a tight budget, so I would ask brother to pay $15 per hour and you pay $10.

One sitter for 5 kids seems like a lot..if child is a toddler. This seems unsafe