Elderly can be particularly vulnerable to these scams when they are recently widowed.

Scammers will look through obituaries to see who has a surviving spouse. The obituaries will also usually list other surviving family members like children and grandchildren.
The scammer will find a widow/widower with college age grandchildren and give the same type of story that was given to OP's mom--out of town with friends, got into some type of legal trouble and need bail/lawyers fees--PLEASE DON'T TELL MY PARENTS! Etc.

It's nice to see some PPs have stories where store clerks/bank tellers were able to see the warning signs and intervene.

A similar thing happened to my friend's mom, who was just right at 60 and has full mental faculties. The scammers even acted like my friend at one point and fooled her. For 6 hours she drove to different banks withdrawing money. One of the bank tellers noticed she was distressed and intervened so fortunately no money had been sent. It was so unbelievable to us all at the time, but she said she was so upset and worried for her daughter, that trumped all common sense and reason.

Anonymous wrote:OP's mom (and those skeptical of this story) should read this article. Scammers are really prevalent and very persuasive. https://www.nytimes.com/2021/01/27/magazine/scam-call-centers.html

Thank you for the link. I am going to send it on to my parents and other elderly people we know. My parents are in their 80s. They were raised differently. When they get a phone call they feel compelled in some way to answer it even if they don't know who is calling. When they answer the phone they give their names. They respond to questions. These are very smart people who used to hold important jobs. They don't understand that the world is different these days and the crooks are dishonorable people specifically targeting the elderly.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I am so sorry this happened to your mom OP and to you. I do not have any advice but have to say that your mom's situation is a testament of her love for you. I think that when a mother hears of a hardship happening to their child they are instantly not in the right mindset to think clearly. They just want to help in any way possible. This is how your mom was tricked: the scammers played upon her basic hard-wired need to care for and protect you.

I hope you are right. I mean, I know certainly you are right she was overcome with a need to help me, but I am still feeling worried that she might be deteriorating mentally and I feel very helpless.

Those scammers are very convincing and very pushy. My parents we in their 50s when they almost got scammed out of tons of money in a similar fashion. They only thing that helped is that they did not have enough money to send and called me to loan some.

I am so sorry, OP. The PP is correct that the scammers are very convincing. It sounds like your mom was trying to keep it quiet to save you the 'embarrassment.' You need to report this ASAP to the police. The money may be gone but you never know. At least you can alert the police and they can alert the public in your parents' area.

Tell your parents not to answer at unfamiliar phone numbers.letthe person leave a message if they are real. Don’t answer home phone.

Put a credit hold on her accounts. Make sure that she didn't share other personal or financial information with them. Call the police.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:So she didn’t try to call you at all in the past few days? Didn’t tell anyone at all who thought it was suspicious?

We spoke Sunday and the Tuesday afternoon I sent her a photo, the damage happened in this window. And no, she didn’t tell anyone. My whole family is mad at her which makes me feel even worse for her but come on... why didn’t she confide in anyone but my stepdad? It is really mind boggling. My DH is furious she didn’t call him.

Wow, your family is mad at her and your husband is furious?? I guess it’s true no good deed goes unpunished....

Give her a break. Those scammers are very convincing. Your poor mother is humiliated and on top of it, her family is angry and questioning her sanity. Y’all need to be more compassionate. If my H were furious at my mom for this, we’d be having a serious come-to-Jesus moment.

I agree. It was her money. Just leave her alone about it unless she asks for help to report it.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:So she didn’t try to call you at all in the past few days? Didn’t tell anyone at all who thought it was suspicious?

We spoke Sunday and the Tuesday afternoon I sent her a photo, the damage happened in this window. And no, she didn’t tell anyone. My whole family is mad at her which makes me feel even worse for her but come on... why didn’t she confide in anyone but my stepdad? It is really mind boggling. My DH is furious she didn’t call him.

Wow, your family is mad at her and your husband is furious?? I guess it’s true no good deed goes unpunished....

Give her a break. Those scammers are very convincing. Your poor mother is humiliated and on top of it, her family is angry and questioning her sanity. Y’all need to be more compassionate. If my H were furious at my mom for this, we’d be having a serious come-to-Jesus moment.

+1

Your husband is a horrible person, OP. Your poor mom.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:So she didn’t try to call you at all in the past few days? Didn’t tell anyone at all who thought it was suspicious?

We spoke Sunday and the Tuesday afternoon I sent her a photo, the damage happened in this window. And no, she didn’t tell anyone. My whole family is mad at her which makes me feel even worse for her but come on... why didn’t she confide in anyone but my stepdad? It is really mind boggling. My DH is furious she didn’t call him.

Wow, your family is mad at her and your husband is furious?? I guess it’s true no good deed goes unpunished....

Give her a break. Those scammers are very convincing. Your poor mother is humiliated and on top of it, her family is angry and questioning her sanity. Y’all need to be more compassionate. If my H were furious at my mom for this, we’d be having a serious come-to-Jesus moment.

This happened to my mom but luckily I was visiting her and answered the phone. Same scam - “grandma, I was in a car accident and need money to bail me out of jail.” Person spoke with a voice like they had their nose broken and even said that’s what happened when I questioned why they sounded funny. Even I thought it was real at first and even asked “is this Danny?” (My nephew) Then of course the scammer said yes, it’s Danny. After another minute I caught on and told them “well Danny looks like you are going to rot in jail because Grandma isn’t paying” and hung up. But the scammers have their shtick down. I can see why someone may fall for it.

OP that sucks, I'm so sorry to hear this. $50k is a chunk of scratch no matter anyone's financial situation - I hope they are ok.

Some friends of mine fell for something like this. One of them is a real "helper" type. They're very smart and even sophisticated, yet they send the requested gift cards. I was really surprised they got taken. Thank goodness it was only a few hundred $.

70 isn't young. She made a mistake, she should report it and move forward.

OP's mom (and those skeptical of this story) should read this article. Scammers are really prevalent and very persuasive. https://www.nytimes.com/2021/01/27/magazine/scam-call-centers.html

Some friends of my mom's fell for this. They were purchasing visa gift cars to pay the "attorney" when a kindly clerk started quizzing them and pointed out that this is often a scam.

What surprises me is the reluctance the victims feel to call the family member to check it out.