Hi OP - It's good that you are being thoughtful about this.

I froze my eggs at 36 and 37 and had a baby at 41, so the good news is that it's certainly possible. I froze the eggs at Shady Grove because the technology was still pretty new and they had a lot of experience with it. That's the good news.

Here are the tougher parts: IVF process itself, including just the egg freezing, can be pretty rough. First of all, there are all of the injections, the wild hormone swings and the fact that you have to be put under for the egg retrieval surgery. You also have near daily appointments and will have to find the time away from work for them and the surgery. It is also pretty emotionally intense. You get good news one day, devastating news the next, then more hopeful news... all of this combined with the hormones you are injecting.

Then there is the number of eggs you are going to want to have. Most REs suggest 20 per child you aim to have. Some people in their mid-30s get very lucky and get 20 on the first try, but most don't and need a second cycle. And then there are the constant tough decisions to make: eggs or embryos? If no normal embryos, try again? How many children do we want to have - and then how many eggs/embryos needed? How many tries are we willing to do and how many to bank?

And then cost wise, as PPs noted, it will likely be well over $20k for embryos, eggs might hit closer to your budget. But here's the thing, if money isn't an obstacle for you, this is not the place to be thrifty. Think about it: if you spend $10k on egg freezing at an ok clinic, will you spend the next 2 or 3 years wondering if those eggs are any good? Ideally, you want to go to a clinic with a great lab and freeze embryos that are PGS tested and have some degree of confidence that they could lead to a baby.

Which brings me to the fact that you are only 1-2 years away from having kids and already have a partner. I did all of this because I hadn't met someone yet, but if I had a partner, there is no way in hell I'd put myself through all of the above. There is a reason why healthy, partnered people don't do IVF.

My suggestion to you: Go get the testing done. Find out how healthy your ovarian reserve and your partner's sperm is. And assuming all looks good, take the date you would be ready to have kids and cut it in half. If it's two years from now, try the old fashioned way in 1 year. You probably won't get pregnant immediately and you'll be pregnant for nine months - and there you are 2 years out.

BTW you are smart to think about whether you have the time and finances for a baby now. In the DC metro area you need way beyond the price of freezing embryos or eggs every single year to raise a child. It is a huge investment of your full self and it is great that you plan.

For this scenario as soon as covid restrictions ease go bank embryos in Prague. I compared abroad with Shady Grove and there is no contest. My entire trip: meds, healthcare, airfare, hotel, food, sightseeing all-in total was about 10K. Here is easily double that. My meds alone here would have been 4-5K and that’s not even included in the clinics price!
You have no known fertility issues. You don’t need a super specialist for hard cases.

Anonymous wrote:I don't see any issue with wanting to wait a year or two if you're not ready to have children now. I certainly wasn't ready at 36, and even though I've struggled to get pregnant at 38/39, I don't look back and think I should have had children earlier. I do wish I had had my eggs frozen earlier, but hindsight is 20/20, and it's really expensive!

I would suggest going ahead and scheduling a consult at one of the fertility clinics and getting the standard initial diagnostic testing. Insurance typically will cover the consult and diagnostic tests. You can also get the testing done at an OB/GYN. Husband should get a semen analysis too. If everything is normal, I would just go with egg retrieval for now. If there are other issues, then IVF might be the better option, but a doctor would be able to give you more information on which option to choose. An egg retrieval alone will be cheaper than creating embryos, though it will still likely be above 10K in this area especially after you factor in the cost of medication. Another poster mentioned CNY, and that is definitely a great, more affordable option. If it turns out that you have difficulty having a child naturally when you are ready, then, at that time, you can pay the extra cost to have the eggs fertilized and have them tested (if that is what you choose).

There are a couple of cons with just doing an egg retrieval now vs. going ahead and creating embryos: (1) while most eggs do survive the thaw, some may not; there's also no way to tell how many will be successfully fertilized later and make it to blastocyst, and (2) you can't do genetics testing on eggs like you can with embryos so you won't know how many of your stored eggs are actually normal. 36 is still relatively young, however, and while some women that age and younger have issues with egg quality, the majority still have a good number of normal eggs. If you may be a low responder to the meds and produce few eggs, that might be a reason to proceed with fertilization now, but a doctor can tell you, generally, what to expect before you even start meds, and then adjust recommendations based on your monitoring results (while on meds, you'd be going into the office every 1-2 days for blood tests and ultrasounds). Ultimately, creating embryos now can give you a bit more peace of mind, but it will be more expensive. There really are no easy decisions when it comes to this stuff. Good luck to you!

Also, one more thing. I'm doing IVF at Shady Grove and have had a good experience there so far. They offer single cycle as well as packages for both IVF and egg retrieval. I've heard people mention that Shady Grove has egg retrieval packages where, for example, you will get up to 3 retrievals to get a certain amount of eggs. I've also had friends have good experiences at Dominion for egg retrieval and IVF.

I don't see any issue with wanting to wait a year or two if you're not ready to have children now. I certainly wasn't ready at 36, and even though I've struggled to get pregnant at 38/39, I don't look back and think I should have had children earlier. I do wish I had had my eggs frozen earlier, but hindsight is 20/20, and it's really expensive!

I would suggest going ahead and scheduling a consult at one of the fertility clinics and getting the standard initial diagnostic testing. Insurance typically will cover the consult and diagnostic tests. You can also get the testing done at an OB/GYN. Husband should get a semen analysis too. If everything is normal, I would just go with egg retrieval for now. If there are other issues, then IVF might be the better option, but a doctor would be able to give you more information on which option to choose. An egg retrieval alone will be cheaper than creating embryos, though it will still likely be above 10K in this area especially after you factor in the cost of medication. Another poster mentioned CNY, and that is definitely a great, more affordable option. If it turns out that you have difficulty having a child naturally when you are ready, then, at that time, you can pay the extra cost to have the eggs fertilized and have them tested (if that is what you choose).

There are a couple of cons with just doing an egg retrieval now vs. going ahead and creating embryos: (1) while most eggs do survive the thaw, some may not; there's also no way to tell how many will be successfully fertilized later and make it to blastocyst, and (2) you can't do genetics testing on eggs like you can with embryos so you won't know how many of your stored eggs are actually normal. 36 is still relatively young, however, and while some women that age and younger have issues with egg quality, the majority still have a good number of normal eggs. If you may be a low responder to the meds and produce few eggs, that might be a reason to proceed with fertilization now, but a doctor can tell you, generally, what to expect before you even start meds, and then adjust recommendations based on your monitoring results (while on meds, you'd be going into the office every 1-2 days for blood tests and ultrasounds). Ultimately, creating embryos now can give you a bit more peace of mind, but it will be more expensive. There really are no easy decisions when it comes to this stuff. Good luck to you!

Anonymous wrote:also NOTHING is guaranteed. If you're 36 you should be trying naturally anyway.

Insurance doesn't check to see if you're "infertile" IF you have coverage (and you should check your policy because it's not that common that it is covered). There are many actual infertilie people with no insurance coverage and that are basically SOOL financially.

If you are over 35 and don't get pregnant for 6 months of actively trying you go to an RE. The thing is, no one can actually prove you've been or haven't been trying so you just make an appointment at an RE. Some take insurance, some don't. Some policies just cover the cost of testing for diagnosis (i.e. no actual ivf/iui coverage, just the bloodwork needed to confirm your numbers). Even then the max could be 10k which is NOTHING when you factor in the costs plus drugs. One cycle can run you 25-30k and again no refunds if it doesn't work.

I had one policy 3 years ago that was the gold standard. No pre approval and no lifetime max. I did three rounds of retrievals and none of my embryos took over several transfers. NONE. it was probably the equivalent of 125k flushed down the toilet.

So just try naturally and you'll probably be one of the lucky ones that get pregnant easily. The only real reason to freeze embryos or eggs now is if you didn't have a partner.

I’m sorry about your experience, thanks for sharing. I am going to dig into my policy and figure out what they’ll cover.

also NOTHING is guaranteed. If you're 36 you should be trying naturally anyway.

Insurance doesn't check to see if you're "infertile" IF you have coverage (and you should check your policy because it's not that common that it is covered). There are many actual infertilie people with no insurance coverage and that are basically SOOL financially.

If you are over 35 and don't get pregnant for 6 months of actively trying you go to an RE. The thing is, no one can actually prove you've been or haven't been trying so you just make an appointment at an RE. Some take insurance, some don't. Some policies just cover the cost of testing for diagnosis (i.e. no actual ivf/iui coverage, just the bloodwork needed to confirm your numbers). Even then the max could be 10k which is NOTHING when you factor in the costs plus drugs. One cycle can run you 25-30k and again no refunds if it doesn't work.

I had one policy 3 years ago that was the gold standard. No pre approval and no lifetime max. I did three rounds of retrievals and none of my embryos took over several transfers. NONE. it was probably the equivalent of 125k flushed down the toilet.

So just try naturally and you'll probably be one of the lucky ones that get pregnant easily. The only real reason to freeze embryos or eggs now is if you didn't have a partner.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I know this has probably been answered a million times but I am trying to piece this together for my situation.

I’m 36...I should have done this 10 years ago but I didn’t. I think I may want to have a bio kid in next 3 years but I am not ready right now. My friends are saying to freeze some embryos like ASAP to give me that option in like a year or two when I am more likely to be ready. This is all being delayed bc of career.

Where should I go in DC for this? How do I decide? I assume this is all out of pocket (bc I am doing it voluntarily) so I guess I am not totally cost insensitive. Would be ideal to keep this under $10k.

This makes no sense, unless you have some reason to think you or spouse have fertility issues that you didn't mention. Most women can get pregnant at 37 or 38. I have significant genetic fertility issues, but even I was fine at that age.

What career is so intense that it requires you to delay kids at 36, but also doesn't pay enough that you can afford an IVF cycle? Assuming there is some financial payoff to delaying kids for your career (like you're a surgeon in training or trying to make partner at a law firm or something), you could finance the IVF and pay it off later.

OP here. I could pay for it now - I could pay any of these amounts now. But since I am doing this out of abundance of caution and to have access to younger eggs, I was hoping to keep it around $10k. If $20k is what it takes, that’s fine and doable, I just wasn’t sure since I wasn’t doing a full IVF cycle at this stage.

You would be doing the most expensive parts of the IVF cycle: meds, monitoring and retrieval. The transfer doesn’t cost all that much if you look at the cost breakdown. You’re not saving all that much by freezing instead of tranfering right away. And you will have to pay yearly storage fees.

$10k is not going to happen in the DC metro area. At your age you should do PGS testing before banking your embryos so will drive up the cost even more.
If you are in a stable relationship I’d just start trying. That’s the cheapest option.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I know this has probably been answered a million times but I am trying to piece this together for my situation.

I’m 36...I should have done this 10 years ago but I didn’t. I think I may want to have a bio kid in next 3 years but I am not ready right now. My friends are saying to freeze some embryos like ASAP to give me that option in like a year or two when I am more likely to be ready. This is all being delayed bc of career.

Where should I go in DC for this? How do I decide? I assume this is all out of pocket (bc I am doing it voluntarily) so I guess I am not totally cost insensitive. Would be ideal to keep this under $10k.

This makes no sense, unless you have some reason to think you or spouse have fertility issues that you didn't mention. Most women can get pregnant at 37 or 38. I have significant genetic fertility issues, but even I was fine at that age.

What career is so intense that it requires you to delay kids at 36, but also doesn't pay enough that you can afford an IVF cycle? Assuming there is some financial payoff to delaying kids for your career (like you're a surgeon in training or trying to make partner at a law firm or something), you could finance the IVF and pay it off later.

OP here. I could pay for it now - I could pay any of these amounts now. But since I am doing this out of abundance of caution and to have access to younger eggs, I was hoping to keep it around $10k. If $20k is what it takes, that’s fine and doable, I just wasn’t sure since I wasn’t doing a full IVF cycle at this stage.

Are you getting divorced?

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I know this has probably been answered a million times but I am trying to piece this together for my situation.

I’m 36...I should have done this 10 years ago but I didn’t. I think I may want to have a bio kid in next 3 years but I am not ready right now. My friends are saying to freeze some embryos like ASAP to give me that option in like a year or two when I am more likely to be ready. This is all being delayed bc of career.

Where should I go in DC for this? How do I decide? I assume this is all out of pocket (bc I am doing it voluntarily) so I guess I am not totally cost insensitive. Would be ideal to keep this under $10k.

This makes no sense, unless you have some reason to think you or spouse have fertility issues that you didn't mention. Most women can get pregnant at 37 or 38. I have significant genetic fertility issues, but even I was fine at that age.

What career is so intense that it requires you to delay kids at 36, but also doesn't pay enough that you can afford an IVF cycle? Assuming there is some financial payoff to delaying kids for your career (like you're a surgeon in training or trying to make partner at a law firm or something), you could finance the IVF and pay it off later.

OP here. I could pay for it now - I could pay any of these amounts now. But since I am doing this out of abundance of caution and to have access to younger eggs, I was hoping to keep it around $10k. If $20k is what it takes, that’s fine and doable, I just wasn’t sure since I wasn’t doing a full IVF cycle at this stage.

You’d be doing everything except having an embryo transferred to your uterus, so you’d be doing all of the most expensive parts of ivf, plus you’d have to pay for freezing the embryos and then a yearly storage fee. This is not going to be cheaper than a complete ivf cycle that includes embryo transfer.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I know this has probably been answered a million times but I am trying to piece this together for my situation.

I’m 36...I should have done this 10 years ago but I didn’t. I think I may want to have a bio kid in next 3 years but I am not ready right now. My friends are saying to freeze some embryos like ASAP to give me that option in like a year or two when I am more likely to be ready. This is all being delayed bc of career.

Where should I go in DC for this? How do I decide? I assume this is all out of pocket (bc I am doing it voluntarily) so I guess I am not totally cost insensitive. Would be ideal to keep this under $10k.

This makes no sense, unless you have some reason to think you or spouse have fertility issues that you didn't mention. Most women can get pregnant at 37 or 38. I have significant genetic fertility issues, but even I was fine at that age.

What career is so intense that it requires you to delay kids at 36, but also doesn't pay enough that you can afford an IVF cycle? Assuming there is some financial payoff to delaying kids for your career (like you're a surgeon in training or trying to make partner at a law firm or something), you could finance the IVF and pay it off later.

OP here. I could pay for it now - I could pay any of these amounts now. But since I am doing this out of abundance of caution and to have access to younger eggs, I was hoping to keep it around $10k. If $20k is what it takes, that’s fine and doable, I just wasn’t sure since I wasn’t doing a full IVF cycle at this stage.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I know this has probably been answered a million times but I am trying to piece this together for my situation.

I’m 36...I should have done this 10 years ago but I didn’t. I think I may want to have a bio kid in next 3 years but I am not ready right now. My friends are saying to freeze some embryos like ASAP to give me that option in like a year or two when I am more likely to be ready. This is all being delayed bc of career.

Where should I go in DC for this? How do I decide? I assume this is all out of pocket (bc I am doing it voluntarily) so I guess I am not totally cost insensitive. Would be ideal to keep this under $10k.

This makes no sense, unless you have some reason to think you or spouse have fertility issues that you didn't mention. Most women can get pregnant at 37 or 38. I have significant genetic fertility issues, but even I was fine at that age.

What career is so intense that it requires you to delay kids at 36, but also doesn't pay enough that you can afford an IVF cycle? Assuming there is some financial payoff to delaying kids for your career (like you're a surgeon in training or trying to make partner at a law firm or something), you could finance the IVF and pay it off later.

OP here. I think my insurance would pay for IVF if I was doing that bc I’m infertile. But I don’t know that I am infertile (I haven’t tried and I have zero reason to think I am) so I figured the retrieval, testing and freezing was all on me.

Am I not understanding something correctly? Like my assumption is that if I come back to these eggs 2-3 years from now and say, hey, turns out I am infertile and I want to put some of these eggs in my body - I thought maybe some of that would be covered. . . .maybe I am wrong.

Yeh, just start trying to get pregnant. By the time you do, you will have nine months to “get ready”. It makes no sense to me to go through the Physical and financial stress of IVF in your circumstance.

Anonymous wrote:I know this has probably been answered a million times but I am trying to piece this together for my situation.

I’m 36...I should have done this 10 years ago but I didn’t. I think I may want to have a bio kid in next 3 years but I am not ready right now. My friends are saying to freeze some embryos like ASAP to give me that option in like a year or two when I am more likely to be ready. This is all being delayed bc of career.

Where should I go in DC for this? How do I decide? I assume this is all out of pocket (bc I am doing it voluntarily) so I guess I am not totally cost insensitive. Would be ideal to keep this under $10k.

This makes no sense, unless you have some reason to think you or spouse have fertility issues that you didn't mention. Most women can get pregnant at 37 or 38. I have significant genetic fertility issues, but even I was fine at that age.

What career is so intense that it requires you to delay kids at 36, but also doesn't pay enough that you can afford an IVF cycle? Assuming there is some financial payoff to delaying kids for your career (like you're a surgeon in training or trying to make partner at a law firm or something), you could finance the IVF and pay it off later.