My DS seems to be losing interest as well. He applied to schools outside of driving range and we do not feel comfortable flying. At first, he was fine selecting colleges just by attending their online events. As time as passed and he awaits decisions, he is becoming less and less enthusiastic.

He really wants to spread his wings and try a lifestyle in a different region of the U.S. and we support that. Now he’s worried he made a mistake. I’m hoping when some acceptances start coming in his enthusiasm will return.

Meh! Tours are overrated. You get unduly influenced by the tour guide who may or may not be representative of the larger student body.

We did "under the radar" tours, too, this summer--driving and/or walking on campus and in the nearby city or town. Even without the student tour and the admissions info session, our son got a good idea what each of the campuses felt like, a sense of what was nearby, a vibe. That, combined with the online tour and the chance to talk with a current student, were what he had to go on to pick his ED. I think he chose well.

I would suggest that you sit down with her and pick her top two or three to which she is accepted, call their admissions offices, and ask if she can zoom with a current student just to chat about life at the school. This is the next best thing to visiting in person and may help her see a more personal side.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Are you sure she's a candidate for college at all? All this superficial losing of interest based on tours makes her sound completely flakey.

I'm not the OP, but you are an ass. I'm not sure if you are a parent of a senior, but I am. These kids have been out of school since last March, when they unexpectedly left school in the 3rd quarter of their junior year and will likely never return again. They are disconnected and it can be hard to get them to see what the world will look like outside of their rooms or learning spaces and what the future holds. This is difficult and unprecedented. Cut the kids some slack if they are having trouble getting excited about things.

This 100%

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I’m very hesitant to travel but the one trip we’ve made since March was to look at an ED school. Walking around even a mostly empty campus was really helpful. We did not talk to anyone there or see inside at all but drove around and got a sense of the size, layout, and neighborhood. Perhaps you could go visit top one or two in April, when hopefully there will have been more vaccinations.

+1 We did this. What I did was took notes of the online walking tour (what building they started at, then the next building, etc.)
Then I got a map of the campus, and plotted out the tour.
Then we went there and walked the campus, replicating the tour.
The campus was empty but we chatted with the bike cops.
DD loved it.

We flew there in August and stayed in a hotel walking distance from the school, and rented a car.

We recently did this too. DS accepted to a school about 2 hours away, and we drove to it to just see the campus, the general area, etc. it was two days after the semester had ended so we may have been able to see some hustle and bustle (they had some in-person classes) but missed it.

At any rate, it did give DS an opportunity to at least see the school physically and helps inform his choice some.

I had been hoping we could make accepted student days, but seeing how things are going with COVID rates, slow vaccine roll-out, looks like that will be off the table.

OP here. Thank you to those who have offered considerate suggestions!

I do recognize that touring a college campus is a luxury. I did not take any college tours myself, as neither of my parents went to college (in fact, neither finished high school), and neither they nor I had any idea about how the whole college application game worked. I had no idea that there WAS such a thing as a college tour. I had visited an older friend once at a local private college that I fell in love with, but which my family could not afford. I was given a choice between two local public colleges, site unseen, and went to the one closest to my home for financial reasons. While I was thankful to be able to go at all, of course I wanted to give my own children more of a choice.

We have since driven to walk around one of the local universities that DD was accepted to but which are not offering tours, and she has watched their videos online. I will say that I do get her point - there is a big difference in walking around a campus with a group of other potential students (even socially distanced and masked) and being able to speak one on one with a student tour guide who is currently attending, versus walking around an empty campus by yourself. Of course, we understand the need for safety, given the pandemic. But seeing school A, where you are personally welcomed, can hear remarks from the current tour guides and get their perspectives, and get a sense of what the student body is like, does give you more of a picture than perhaps at School B, just looking at their website or watching online videos. Some schools are definitely making more effort with their outreach than others, and some are doing it better than others.

I have an older DS who felt that visiting definitely made a difference in his college selection. One school looked great on paper and had a strong reputation, but being there at Accepted Students Day in person gave him a clearer picture of the student body, the faculty, and the interactions and insight of that day moved him to drop that school from first place to third. While being able to tour is not the be all and end all, I do think there is value in it. I'm encouraging DD to keep an open mind and try to get a sense of the non-tourable schools from some of their live online presentations.

I've also reiterated that there are many good schools, and that she would likely be happy at most of them. I was not crazy about the university I went to at first, but grew to love it over four years.