Anonymous wrote:I’m of the school of thought that a child can’t have too many people who truly love them.

In my child’s life, he’s deeply loved by DH’s parents and his Godparents (my best friend and her husband). I wish he had more.

My kids are blessed. A wonderful stepfather and step brother. Until Covid, four living grandparents and a living step grandmother, over a dozen aunts abd uncles. My best friend and her family.

Their grandparents, aunts, uncles.

Truly love? Just me and my DH, and maaaaaybe two very close friends who clearly adore her and have no children of their own.

My parents like the idea of my DD but barely know her and have made almost no attempt to get to know her. MIL tries much harder but is limited in other ways. They are all very emotionally immature and easily discouraged when my (very young!) DD does not serve or anticipate their needs the way they want her to. They love her, but it's so limiting because there is very little room for her to have her own needs, wants, or interests.

The aunts and uncles do a little better because they are less hung up having my DD give them a specific type of love or validation. But those that have kids are likely too focused on them to really invest in mine (and vice versa, this isn't a judgment). And the one who is childless I think holds himself at a bit of a remove because he is unsure how to approach a relationship with a child. Though I could see their relationship growing with time (he will never have children) and I like the idea of them having a special bond.

It makes me sad to think about this, actually. My DD is such an extraordinary person and has so much to give. I do hope she has friends and teachers and romantic partners in the future who will see her as fully as DH and I do. She certainly deserves that. In the meantime, we do our best to make sure she knows how loved she is by us.

I, DH, child's sibling, grandparents (my parents) and uncles (my brothers) love them. I know that my parents would die for my kids, and they take care of them in their first 3 years while we work.

Dh's parents, my husband's brother & his family do not care much about my kids.

Our beloved nanny and my youngest sister.

So many are giving the rote answer.

Truly love? Just one set of grandparents, my best friend and my DD’s former nanny. We have a huge family with aunts, uncles, cousins, grandparents and although we see them (pre-covid) and share holidays, it’s not that deep love.

My parents (one now deceased), my husbands' parents and stepparents, my sister and her kids, my husband's sister and her family. Not sure about his two brothers. I mean, I think they love them, but maybe not deeply (he is not close with his brothers). The two nannies we have had, for sure.

Their grandparents, aunt, uncle and cousins.

Their two parents
Their siblings
Their grandparents
Their uncles, aunts and cousins.
Their best friends.

Me, their Dad, their 2 grandmothers.

Maybe their stepmother? It's hard for me to say. She certainly feels affection for them and they get along fine, but I'm not sure how deep it runs.

They have aunts/uncles/cousins but we're very geographically distant from each other so they don't see each other often enough to have that real bond.

DH and I, grandparents, 2 uncles, 1 aunt, 2 cousins they see often, a Godparent

My parents and my brother and sister and I believe their spouses feel the same way. We are all very close.

DH’s best lifelong friend (who is our DD’s Godmother) is the only one who truly loves our child. She doesn’t have children nor ever wanted to. But she truly loves and knows DD and would do anything for her.

I wish my DD had more people in her life like her Godmother.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Sometimes I wonder if my mother truly loves her grandchildren or if they are merely a reflection of her and possessions to brag about.

My grandmother and my MIL truly love our kids and delight in their every word, burb or giggle. I have no doubt that they would sell everything if my kids needs the money (or organ!). Both would die for my kids. Sadly, I doubt my own mother would reschedule a tennis date for them.

Just my DH and I, the rest do self serving type of love.

+1. Same, sadly.

“Truly loves...” is an interesting distinction.

I know my brother and sister love my kids but not above or equal to the love they feel for their own.

I know my parents love my kids but not in the same way they love their own children.

I know my in-laws say they love my kids, their only grandchildren, but don’t know them.