Anonymous
Post 12/18/2020 08:20     Subject: Reaction to college acceptance
Anonymous wrote:

You want the truth?

It's because NO ONE CARES.

It's not that they don't like you and your kid, but unless it's Harvard, which merits two exclamation points instead of one in the congratulations, NO ONE CARES.

I would never expect anyone to show the slightest interest in where my kids go to college. This is one of those subjects that are of interest to the parents and kid, but not to anyone else. When other people mention college acceptances, I smile, say the obligatory words of happiness, and change the subject. What on earth do you expect me to do?



+1. My kid got in ED and I texted the one friend who showed an interest in where they were going and got back a congratulatory text and that seems entirely sufficient.

In fact this year as we were going through the process I was much more interested in where my friends’ kids applied enrolled last year than I was last year— because I thought it might be helpful for us as I was looking for ideas of how to winnow down the number of schools to look at.
Anonymous
Post 12/18/2020 08:19     Subject: Reaction to college acceptance
Anonymous wrote:

You want the truth?

It's because NO ONE CARES.

It's not that they don't like you and your kid, but unless it's Harvard, which merits two exclamation points instead of one in the congratulations, NO ONE CARES.

I would never expect anyone to show the slightest interest in where my kids go to college. This is one of those subjects that are of interest to the parents and kid, but not to anyone else. When other people mention college acceptances, I smile, say the obligatory words of happiness, and change the subject. What on earth do you expect me to do?





I disagree. People do care. People who’ve been through it anyway, or who have kids yet to go through it. My kids and their friends (and parents) are all about it right now. Lots of congratulations on Instagram or their parents on FB. It’s a big deal, and not just Harvard. Haven’t seen any Harvards but a Penn, a Stanford, a Vandy, and many other colleges up and down the range of admission difficulty. It’s fun and generally very positive.

I’ve definitely encountered the weird parents. One I know reached out to me because he saw something on social media about my daughter getting into an excellent college. Said nothing about the accomplishment, just kept saying how expensive it is. Didn’t bother me but pretty pathetic.
Anonymous
Post 12/18/2020 08:19     Subject: Reaction to college acceptance
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:They find you annoying when I comes to the subject of colleges and didn’t want to give you the satisfaction of giving you your moment to preen.

At least, that’s how I reacted to the annoying parents.


What on earth is annoying about sharing a college or university acceptance? It’s wonderful news. Congratulations to your DC!


Eh, OP seems like one of those annoying parents who are insanely over-invested in their child's college acceptance.
Anonymous
Post 12/18/2020 08:11     Subject: Re:Reaction to college acceptance
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:People are jealous. I learned my lesson to not share news.


OP here. This is close to my own thinking. Here are my two thoughts:

1) We’re not one of those families that believes a student must cure cancer to go to a good school. My kid took tough courses, got good grades and test scores, and wrote great essays. That’s it. I think there’s disbelief that it can be that simple. So, there’s the notion that we’re “lucky.”

2) We do not believe that somewhat better ranked privates are worth the money; instead we see UVA as a great value. Thus, we were very practical with the ED selection. Many other kids with similar qualifications ED to a reach, and are oftentimes disappointed. Typically, these students cycle back to a better state school. From that perspective, we cut the madness short. Again, we are “lucky.”

In sum, I think it’s jealously and disbelief that we got the “prize” without the craziness.


Are you in VA? 40% instate ED candidates accepted to UVA. It is truly worth celebrating your joy and pride, but it is insane to think that anyone is jealous or thinks you’re so “lucky”.


In state it can be a savings if almost half a million if you bank the difference and wisely invest the difference between the $16k tuition if UVA (30 if living in campus -ours didn’t) and $80 that many privates are now asking. Remember also you pay I. After tax dollars. So we saved like crazy during the UVA years and can now afford to help out with grad school and law school for two children. So yes some do think off it as winning the lottery


Is it really a lottery if 40% of people win?
Anonymous
Post 12/18/2020 08:08     Subject: Reaction to college acceptance
OP, here is the truth. Your friend’s kids are applying to elite colleges. They don’t care your kid got into a public, in-state flagship. People outside your NOVA public school just don’t think getting into UVA is the same thing as getting into an elite school. Sorry. I also suspect you are annoying. Who tells people where their kid got into college without being asked? It is your kid’s news, not yours!
Anonymous
Post 12/18/2020 08:01     Subject: Reaction to college acceptance
Alot of people are very stressed right now. I don't expect any big celebrations from my fellow parents of seniors, too many people are getting rejected and/or deferred and it will settle out in May.
Anonymous
Post 12/18/2020 06:37     Subject: Re:Reaction to college acceptance
Anonymous wrote:It was a like a knife to their hearts, OP. Go easy on them. Congratulations!


Not every cares about uva. Congrats and be on with it. WhT do you want people to do?
Anonymous
Post 12/18/2020 02:20     Subject: Re:Reaction to college acceptance
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:People are jealous. I learned my lesson to not share news.


OP here. This is close to my own thinking. Here are my two thoughts:

1) We’re not one of those families that believes a student must cure cancer to go to a good school. My kid took tough courses, got good grades and test scores, and wrote great essays. That’s it. I think there’s disbelief that it can be that simple. So, there’s the notion that we’re “lucky.”

2) We do not believe that somewhat better ranked privates are worth the money; instead we see UVA as a great value. Thus, we were very practical with the ED selection. Many other kids with similar qualifications ED to a reach, and are oftentimes disappointed. Typically, these students cycle back to a better state school. From that perspective, we cut the madness short. Again, we are “lucky.”

In sum, I think it’s jealously and disbelief that we got the “prize” without the craziness.


Getting my popcorn...


Anonymous
Post 12/18/2020 01:53     Subject: Re:Reaction to college acceptance
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:People are jealous. I learned my lesson to not share news.


OP here. This is close to my own thinking. Here are my two thoughts:

1) We’re not one of those families that believes a student must cure cancer to go to a good school. My kid took tough courses, got good grades and test scores, and wrote great essays. That’s it. I think there’s disbelief that it can be that simple. So, there’s the notion that we’re “lucky.”

2) We do not believe that somewhat better ranked privates are worth the money; instead we see UVA as a great value. Thus, we were very practical with the ED selection. Many other kids with similar qualifications ED to a reach, and are oftentimes disappointed. Typically, these students cycle back to a better state school. From that perspective, we cut the madness short. Again, we are “lucky.”

In sum, I think it’s jealously and disbelief that we got the “prize” without the craziness.


Are you in VA? 40% instate ED candidates accepted to UVA. It is truly worth celebrating your joy and pride, but it is insane to think that anyone is jealous or thinks you’re so “lucky”.


In state it can be a savings if almost half a million if you bank the difference and wisely invest the difference between the $16k tuition if UVA (30 if living in campus -ours didn’t) and $80 that many privates are now asking. Remember also you pay I. After tax dollars. So we saved like crazy during the UVA years and can now afford to help out with grad school and law school for two children. So yes some do think off it as winning the lottery
Anonymous
Post 12/18/2020 01:08     Subject: Re:Reaction to college acceptance
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:People are jealous. I learned my lesson to not share news.


OP here. This is close to my own thinking. Here are my two thoughts:

1) We’re not one of those families that believes a student must cure cancer to go to a good school. My kid took tough courses, got good grades and test scores, and wrote great essays. That’s it. I think there’s disbelief that it can be that simple. So, there’s the notion that we’re “lucky.”

2) We do not believe that somewhat better ranked privates are worth the money; instead we see UVA as a great value. Thus, we were very practical with the ED selection. Many other kids with similar qualifications ED to a reach, and are oftentimes disappointed. Typically, these students cycle back to a better state school. From that perspective, we cut the madness short. Again, we are “lucky.”

In sum, I think it’s jealously and disbelief that we got the “prize” without the craziness.


Just stop OP.


I actually think OP is right. This is an extremely competitive area and people don't even try to hide it. Congratulations, OP! That said, I am mindful that some of these other parents likely are completely stressed out over their own kid's applications. Because this definitely is a sensitive subject, I suggest not volunteering this news further to other parents of seniors unless they specifically ask you about your kid's college plans. I am sure your kid will do great at UVA!!
Anonymous
Post 12/18/2020 01:05     Subject: Reaction to college acceptance


You want the truth?

It's because NO ONE CARES.

It's not that they don't like you and your kid, but unless it's Harvard, which merits two exclamation points instead of one in the congratulations, NO ONE CARES.

I would never expect anyone to show the slightest interest in where my kids go to college. This is one of those subjects that are of interest to the parents and kid, but not to anyone else. When other people mention college acceptances, I smile, say the obligatory words of happiness, and change the subject. What on earth do you expect me to do?



Anonymous
Post 12/18/2020 01:00     Subject: Re:Reaction to college acceptance
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:People are jealous. I learned my lesson to not share news.


OP here. This is close to my own thinking. Here are my two thoughts:

1) We’re not one of those families that believes a student must cure cancer to go to a good school. My kid took tough courses, got good grades and test scores, and wrote great essays. That’s it. I think there’s disbelief that it can be that simple. So, there’s the notion that we’re “lucky.”

2) We do not believe that somewhat better ranked privates are worth the money; instead we see UVA as a great value. Thus, we were very practical with the ED selection. Many other kids with similar qualifications ED to a reach, and are oftentimes disappointed. Typically, these students cycle back to a better state school. From that perspective, we cut the madness short. Again, we are “lucky.”

In sum, I think it’s jealously and disbelief that we got the “prize” without the craziness.


Are you in VA? 40% instate ED candidates accepted to UVA. It is truly worth celebrating your joy and pride, but it is insane to think that anyone is jealous or thinks you’re so “lucky”.
Anonymous
Post 12/18/2020 00:34     Subject: Re:Reaction to college acceptance
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:People are jealous. I learned my lesson to not share news.


OP here. This is close to my own thinking. Here are my two thoughts:

1) We’re not one of those families that believes a student must cure cancer to go to a good school. My kid took tough courses, got good grades and test scores, and wrote great essays. That’s it. I think there’s disbelief that it can be that simple. So, there’s the notion that we’re “lucky.”

2) We do not believe that somewhat better ranked privates are worth the money; instead we see UVA as a great value. Thus, we were very practical with the ED selection. Many other kids with similar qualifications ED to a reach, and are oftentimes disappointed. Typically, these students cycle back to a better state school. From that perspective, we cut the madness short. Again, we are “lucky.”

In sum, I think it’s jealously and disbelief that we got the “prize” without the craziness.


Getting my popcorn...
Anonymous
Post 12/18/2020 00:26     Subject: Reaction to college acceptance
Anonymous wrote:They find you annoying when I comes to the subject of colleges and didn’t want to give you the satisfaction of giving you your moment to preen.

At least, that’s how I reacted to the annoying parents.


What on earth is annoying about sharing a college or university acceptance? It’s wonderful news. Congratulations to your DC!
Anonymous
Post 12/17/2020 23:33     Subject: Reaction to college acceptance
They find you annoying when I comes to the subject of colleges and didn’t want to give you the satisfaction of giving you your moment to preen.

At least, that’s how I reacted to the annoying parents.