This makes no sense. At minimum you will qualify for 6 weeks short term disability.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I honestly could have been okay physically, but I was nursing all night long and had trouble doing major things in life due to sleep deprivation (using knives, making left hand turns, remembering anything). Maybe your husband could formula feed all night long instead of you breastfeeding? I definitely bled for a good 6 weeks, but it was probably because I was at stroller strides at 3 weeks and just never rested.

It's just not doable without massive help and $$$.

who would take care of the new born? 12 weeks is very young for daycare. Nobody sends a 1 week old baby to daycare.

The youngest I've ever even heard of a daycare taking a baby is 6 weeks.

I'm guessing it was a home daycare.

That took a 6 week old? Actually it was my in-house daycare at my old law firm.

Thanks for answering my question!

How much leave are you asking for?
I would have the discussion with your boss first and then decide what to do.

I think the suggestion to bottle feed right away is a good. The thing that will take most of your energy and most of your sleep is feeding the newborn.
I was breastfeeding and took 3 months off, but I really needed 4 months. I was so sleep deprived when I went back that the second week of work I bent over to pick something up in the bathroom and broke my two front teeth on the counter.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I honestly could have been okay physically, but I was nursing all night long and had trouble doing major things in life due to sleep deprivation (using knives, making left hand turns, remembering anything). Maybe your husband could formula feed all night long instead of you breastfeeding? I definitely bled for a good 6 weeks, but it was probably because I was at stroller strides at 3 weeks and just never rested.

It's just not doable without massive help and $$$.

who would take care of the new born? 12 weeks is very young for daycare. Nobody sends a 1 week old baby to daycare.

The youngest I've ever even heard of a daycare taking a baby is 6 weeks.

I'm guessing it was a home daycare.

That took a 6 week old? Actually it was my in-house daycare at my old law firm.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I honestly could have been okay physically, but I was nursing all night long and had trouble doing major things in life due to sleep deprivation (using knives, making left hand turns, remembering anything). Maybe your husband could formula feed all night long instead of you breastfeeding? I definitely bled for a good 6 weeks, but it was probably because I was at stroller strides at 3 weeks and just never rested.

It's just not doable without massive help and $$$.

who would take care of the new born? 12 weeks is very young for daycare. Nobody sends a 1 week old baby to daycare.

The youngest I've ever even heard of a daycare taking a baby is 6 weeks.

So if you were planning to use daycare, just tell your DH that the daycares you called have a 6 week minimum age. Done! Then, make your budget for what you will do if you lose your job. Depending on how long you worked, you might not qualify for unemployment, so look into that.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I honestly could have been okay physically, but I was nursing all night long and had trouble doing major things in life due to sleep deprivation (using knives, making left hand turns, remembering anything). Maybe your husband could formula feed all night long instead of you breastfeeding? I definitely bled for a good 6 weeks, but it was probably because I was at stroller strides at 3 weeks and just never rested.

It's just not doable without massive help and $$$.

who would take care of the new born? 12 weeks is very young for daycare. Nobody sends a 1 week old baby to daycare.

The youngest I've ever even heard of a daycare taking a baby is 6 weeks.

I'm guessing it was a home daycare.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I honestly could have been okay physically, but I was nursing all night long and had trouble doing major things in life due to sleep deprivation (using knives, making left hand turns, remembering anything). Maybe your husband could formula feed all night long instead of you breastfeeding? I definitely bled for a good 6 weeks, but it was probably because I was at stroller strides at 3 weeks and just never rested.

It's just not doable without massive help and $$$.

who would take care of the new born? 12 weeks is very young for daycare. Nobody sends a 1 week old baby to daycare.

The youngest I've ever even heard of a daycare taking a baby is 6 weeks.

This will be a problem. Daycares won’t take babies before six weeks.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I honestly could have been okay physically, but I was nursing all night long and had trouble doing major things in life due to sleep deprivation (using knives, making left hand turns, remembering anything). Maybe your husband could formula feed all night long instead of you breastfeeding? I definitely bled for a good 6 weeks, but it was probably because I was at stroller strides at 3 weeks and just never rested.

It's just not doable without massive help and $$$.

who would take care of the new born? 12 weeks is very young for daycare. Nobody sends a 1 week old baby to daycare.

The youngest I've ever even heard of a daycare taking a baby is 6 weeks.

Anonymous wrote:I honestly could have been okay physically, but I was nursing all night long and had trouble doing major things in life due to sleep deprivation (using knives, making left hand turns, remembering anything). Maybe your husband could formula feed all night long instead of you breastfeeding? I definitely bled for a good 6 weeks, but it was probably because I was at stroller strides at 3 weeks and just never rested.

It's just not doable without massive help and $$$.

who would take care of the new born? 12 weeks is very young for daycare. Nobody sends a 1 week old baby to daycare.

Who is going to care for baby! I thought most places do not even take until 3 mos.

You will be exhausted, your breast will be engorged, you will cry at drop of hat. I cannot even imagine only a week of leave ( especially with first!) However, I had two c-sections so a different scenario.

I hope you can somehow get 12 weeks as that is best case, but if not, I hope for at least two!

with dummies like this, you just need to not listen. there’s no use trying to prove to him that you’ll need more than a few days, and that you don’t put a brand-new newborn in daycare.

so just tell him, don’t ask. “if I get terminated for taking the 12 weeks I need, here’s our budget including unemployment.”

My dd is 10, my wife took two months and still gets sad talking about how little leave she took. Take what you need, you don’t get a do over any you aren’t going to regret have more time with your baby

Calm down. Your boss hasn't even said yet that they're not going to approve you for unpaid leave.

I honestly could have been okay physically, but I was nursing all night long and had trouble doing major things in life due to sleep deprivation (using knives, making left hand turns, remembering anything). Maybe your husband could formula feed all night long instead of you breastfeeding? I definitely bled for a good 6 weeks, but it was probably because I was at stroller strides at 3 weeks and just never rested.

It's just not doable without massive help and $$$.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I...think you might have some bigger problems coming up than this alone. Has your husband been around babies before? Does he understand the work involved?

Yeah some men who haven't been around babies can be delusional. Before our first was born and we were talking about care, DH who works from home said we didn't need to hire any help -- the baby would just sleep in a bassinet next to his desk and he was just going to give her a bottle once in a while.

yeah reminds me of my DH and MIL ... they claimed “MIL will be the nanny!” When I pointed out we would need childcare 5 days a week for 8-9 hours/day, MIL was like “oh, I guess I won’t be the nanny.” In that case I think they weren’t realizing that *I* had to work at my real job.