Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My hometown (entire home state, really) is a national embarrassment full of backwards rednecks, and I got tired of the stereotypes. Much easier to say I've lived in DC longer than anywhere else than to grit-smile through ignorant comments about not having an accent or seeming well-educated.

Floridian, huh?

South Carolina?

A lot of people have insecurities. It's best not to judge them and try to come from a place of compassion

I'm an Army brat and third culture kid so it's complicated. I've lived a lot of places, including overseas. So sometimes I just say my birthplace, upstate NY (also went to college there). Sometimes I say DC (I've lived her half my life, 25 years). That's why.

I lived in the us until I was 2, moved to Beijing until I was 7, lived in Paris, London and Oslo from 7-10. Lived in Vancouver from 10-23, my parents moved to Toronto when I was 21 (so I’ve been going there ever since), I lived in Chicago from 23-24, 24-27 basically lived all over Europe, then from 27-46 I’ve lived in DC. When people ask me where I’m from, I say Toronto because that’s where my family lives. I lived longest in Vancouver, but I haven’t gone back since my parents moved and go to TO many times a year.

This is why I've started asking people "where did you grow up?" Everyone wants to seem like a lifelong urban dweller, and they will do anything to maintain that illusion. It's kind of sad.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:? It’s not a lie, it’s a different way of answering the question.

It is a lie, ESPECIALLY if it's asked in that same city they're currently living. The obvious implication is "where did you grow up/ where are your roots". People trying to find out the town that truly raised and shaped you.

it's disingenuous at best, and I'm curious why anyone would engage in it.

Why are you so bothered by this? When we are traveling, people make small talk and ask where you're from. The answer is "we come from DC, nice weather you have here," not "Well, my wife is a DC native but I was born and raised in small town Ohio, but I spent several years living overseas before moving to DC where we have lived for 13 years."

If you care so much, you can ask people specifically where they were born. I can't imagine being so strident about this.

Who not just say "I'm from Ohio and she's from DC"? Pretty simple, actually. But more importantly, I'm asking about people who answer that to someone WHILE they're in DC.

If you met someone in DC and they asked where you're from, what would you say?

If I knew the person I met already knew I lived in DC, I'd tell them my hometown. But I've lived here for 15+ years, and I haven't lived in my hometown for over 25 years, so unless the person is specifically asking where I was born/grew up, I'm likely to answer "DC." I'm not ashamed of it, it's just rarely relevant information anymore.

And when travelling, if someone asks where I'm from, I say "DC," unless I'm in or near my hometown, in which case I will say, "DC, but I grew up near here."

Well you can rationalize your lies however you like, but you are lying. you're not "from" DC, you're from small town Ohio. But I guess you dont want to say it.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:? It’s not a lie, it’s a different way of answering the question.

It is a lie, ESPECIALLY if it's asked in that same city they're currently living. The obvious implication is "where did you grow up/ where are your roots". People trying to find out the town that truly raised and shaped you.

it's disingenuous at best, and I'm curious why anyone would engage in it.

Why are you so bothered by this? When we are traveling, people make small talk and ask where you're from. The answer is "we come from DC, nice weather you have here," not "Well, my wife is a DC native but I was born and raised in small town Ohio, but I spent several years living overseas before moving to DC where we have lived for 13 years."

If you care so much, you can ask people specifically where they were born. I can't imagine being so strident about this.

Who not just say "I'm from Ohio and she's from DC"? Pretty simple, actually. But more importantly, I'm asking about people who answer that to someone WHILE they're in DC.

If you met someone in DC and they asked where you're from, what would you say?

Well, DC, because I was born and raised here. But I am not all holier than thou about those McLean people who like to say they're from "DC" and not VA. I just roll my eyes internally.

If you want to ask where people are ORIGINALLY from, then you should ask that. "I know you've lived in the neighborhood for the past five years, but where do you and your wife originally hail from?"

Also: some people might not want to share details about their lives with relative strangers . You need to let that go. A PP mentioned growing up in an alcoholic family, which is an excellent reason why someone might not want to head down that road. As another example, my BIL is special forces and he literally will not answer ANY personal questions, even the most banal. It's a product of years of training.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:? It’s not a lie, it’s a different way of answering the question.

It is a lie, ESPECIALLY if it's asked in that same city they're currently living. The obvious implication is "where did you grow up/ where are your roots". People trying to find out the town that truly raised and shaped you.

it's disingenuous at best, and I'm curious why anyone would engage in it.

I was born in a city I do not remember, I lived in another city until I was about 9, and lived in another city until moving away for college. Fast forward to more recently, and I lived in DC until later moving out to the MD suburbs.

Depending on the context, I could answer where I'm from at least five different ways, none of them being a lie.

Anonymous wrote:My hometown (entire home state, really) is a national embarrassment full of backwards rednecks, and I got tired of the stereotypes. Much easier to say I've lived in DC longer than anywhere else than to grit-smile through ignorant comments about not having an accent or seeming well-educated.

Floridian, huh?

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:? It’s not a lie, it’s a different way of answering the question.

It is a lie, ESPECIALLY if it's asked in that same city they're currently living. The obvious implication is "where did you grow up/ where are your roots". People trying to find out the town that truly raised and shaped you.

it's disingenuous at best, and I'm curious why anyone would engage in it.

Why are you so bothered by this? When we are traveling, people make small talk and ask where you're from. The answer is "we come from DC, nice weather you have here," not "Well, my wife is a DC native but I was born and raised in small town Ohio, but I spent several years living overseas before moving to DC where we have lived for 13 years."

If you care so much, you can ask people specifically where they were born. I can't imagine being so strident about this.

Who not just say "I'm from Ohio and she's from DC"? Pretty simple, actually. But more importantly, I'm asking about people who answer that to someone WHILE they're in DC.

If you met someone in DC and they asked where you're from, what would you say?

If I knew the person I met already knew I lived in DC, I'd tell them my hometown. But I've lived here for 15+ years, and I haven't lived in my hometown for over 25 years, so unless the person is specifically asking where I was born/grew up, I'm likely to answer "DC." I'm not ashamed of it, it's just rarely relevant information anymore.

And when travelling, if someone asks where I'm from, I say "DC," unless I'm in or near my hometown, in which case I will say, "DC, but I grew up near here."

When I asked, I state that I was born and raised in the DC area, which I was. Digging any further beyond that question let's me know that the person asking is just being nosey/judgmental.

Context matters.

If I'm in London and someone asks where I'm from they'll get "New Jersey".

If I'm in my city at a coffee shop the response would be the neighborhood I live in and a "but I grew up in the burbs".

Haha, people ask the most ridiculous things when they find out my kids are 12th generation Northern Virginians.

Because I'm ashamed to be from McLean. I hated growing up there, and never felt comfortable or like I fit in.

Anonymous wrote:My husband lies about odd things like this. I've tried to break him of this habit because it's embarrassing when he is caught in the lie.
In his case, he does it because his parents were alcoholics and he just grew up lying about everything that went on in his home, so now lying about something relatively trivial seems as natural as telling the truth.

This makes a lot of sense.