I am a wife and my husband deals with the moms as far as meet ups or even messaging the babysitters. I don’t have time for that crap. I am never on the messages. These women are cute by the way. Never bothered me at all. However, messaging every day about stuff not related to the kids would be pretty red flag for me. Really sad that your husband doesn’t respect your feelings enough to stop messaging her so often. Very odd.

There was a mom like this who got too friendly with my best friend’s STBXH. She was married but complained how unhappy she was. On an out of town tournament she offered him a BJ, no strings attached and he accepted. Claims it didn’t mean anything but my friend left. You need to shut it down now.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I am not OP, but have a somewhat related problem. We have an EC activity that DH is coaching. A mom of one of the kids in that activity texts DH often. It is purely about the activity itself or something directly related to kids other school activities. It is always about the kids but it seems like suddenly she has become his friend. I just find it really annoying but not sure if I am over reacting.

She even calls DH sometimes to discuss these activities. DH is fairly curt in his responses but he responds to her texts.

Any advice for me?

I think this is more normal since he’s the coach and they talk about the activity. If she starts texting about random daily crap, that’s a problem. She’s probably a helicopter parent wanting her kid to be the best

Yea, this is pretty weird. I am very secure and wouldn’t be ok with this type of daily chit chat.

At this point it should be a group text with you on it. I have several group texts that include dads, but my husband is on it
Too and so are their wives.

I would've said this is okay until very recently when one of DS's friends' dad texted me. Just like a random conversational thing We have multiple group chats where he and I are on together and they are pretty active. It felt so weird and out of place. I ended up telling my husband who laughed and said oh so he's flirting with you.

Where the h@ll are all these wives husbands that they are the ones always contacting the coach?? I guess off with their APs which is why their wives are looking for D.

Anonymous wrote:I am not OP, but have a somewhat related problem. We have an EC activity that DH is coaching. A mom of one of the kids in that activity texts DH often. It is purely about the activity itself or something directly related to kids other school activities. It is always about the kids but it seems like suddenly she has become his friend. I just find it really annoying but not sure if I am over reacting.

She even calls DH sometimes to discuss these activities. DH is fairly curt in his responses but he responds to her texts.

Any advice for me?

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:She is a fair bit more attractive than me and that is part of my problem I think.

She's not tho. She's in an unhappy marriage and open about it, she's openly flirting with your DH, etc. What's attractive about her *to him* is that she's paying attention to him. That's it. I mean come on. Most of us are close to, if not over 40. No one here is Heidi Klum. Dollars to donuts your DH wants you. But something's up with him and that needs exploration.

But what if she is? You have no idea what any of these people look like

I cannot stand women like this, married women targeting other women’s husbands. Disgusting.

Next thing you know, she’ll ask him to fix the flush in her bathroom.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:You have to be on the text chain. Period.

We often have both parents on text chains- even when one is more the point of contact; when opposite sex is involved.

Just ignore what I don’t need to know.

Have your husband ass I to the text chat. If she texts only to him; his response has u copied on it too.

This woman is shady AF, btw.

Add you to the text chain (not ass you )

Yes. Absolutely this. Have him copy you in. That will end it quickly. Or it won’t, and he’s showing you a lot about him...and your relationship. I’m sorry OP. I hope he acts decisively and quickly.

BTW, and slight hijack —- DH asked for this with our daughter’s soccer coach who had started to get more chatty on text with me. Nothing weird, just more along the lines of what OP described. But I started to ghost and then copied DH in. Other things fed into this, but we realized coach was probably ‘grooming’ me because he had also started getting more handsy with our daughter. Not at all what’s happening with OP....

Op, you're right. There's red flags all over this. I would be more hurt/mad/annoyed at DH's response to your concerns than the texting itself. He needs to shut it down.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:She is a fair bit more attractive than me and that is part of my problem I think.

She's not tho. She's in an unhappy marriage and open about it, she's openly flirting with your DH, etc. What's attractive about her *to him* is that she's paying attention to him. That's it. I mean come on. Most of us are close to, if not over 40. No one here is Heidi Klum. Dollars to donuts your DH wants you. But something's up with him and that needs exploration.

What’s wrong? Nothing. He has a practiced Ho throwing herself at him and pumping up his ego. Hos like this study the wife and position themselves to try to be the opposite. She probably alludes to you are overly critical and they probably commiserate. She knows exactly what she’s doing.

He’s acting like a loser and sinking to her disgusting level.

I’d personally confront the Ho.

If you are normally fine with his female friends, he should respect your feelings on this one. The fact that he hasn’t is a big problem.

Anonymous wrote:She is a fair bit more attractive than me and that is part of my problem I think.

She's not tho. She's in an unhappy marriage and open about it, she's openly flirting with your DH, etc. What's attractive about her *to him* is that she's paying attention to him. That's it. I mean come on. Most of us are close to, if not over 40. No one here is Heidi Klum. Dollars to donuts your DH wants you. But something's up with him and that needs exploration.