I did a quick estimate of 500 between in the rooms of my four children. These are just the books in their rooms on bookshelves & dressers, and do not include the ones in the eight bookcases downstairs or the in the master bedroom, or the office, or put away in boxes for later or....

That having been said, if she's not actually *reading* them to your daughter, or she's overinvesting in workbooks with little concrete plans to use them, or she's spending a ton of cash on this process (I buy nearly everything used), or you're running out of storage space, then what's up? Just surrounding the child with books is not going to do very much.

Why are YOU not reading to her and why is this all on your wife?

People saying 200 books sounds excessive... if you get them cheap and keep them from cluttering up the place (could be true of anything, like toys)... You can fit 2-3 kids' books in a horizontal inch of shelving, so we're talking about, let's see... maybe 6 feet of shelf space? Two 3-foot shelves?

And I guess I don't see how, if space/money/organization aren't the issue, one can ever really have "too many" books. Maybe the wrong *kind* of books, if they aren't being utilized at all. But I don't see how one could say, "Well, 50 books is enough for a 4-year-old" or whatever. Sure, you can make do with any number, but I don't see where there should be a limit, per se. Seems really subjective.

I agree with this! We have easily triple this number (though granted 2 kids, not 1) and I'd say that decently organized, they would probably only take up a medium bookcase. As is, we have them divided between the living room and the kids rooms, and nowhere do these books occupy more than 2-3 "average" shelves. I don't really get the "clutter" issue.

This is op. Yes, DW mostly shops from amazon, and she tends to buy more when there is Buy 2 get 1 sale promotion. She got extra 9 books yesterday. DD loves to do workbooks, and she does not need adult supervision. She only reads a small section of books based on her interest & reading levels, and she only reads books when she is bored. It is true that many books are like decors for now, but DW says that DD may grow to read them when she gets older. Her daycare teacher says she is a good reader at daycare, but I rarely see her read books at home. Her little brother ,20 months old, picks up a book to “read” whenever he sees DD reads a book or does workbook. Maybe we should setup a routine to read like 10 mins every night.

We don’t have a bookshelf on the living room, maybe we should consider to get one for better organization. We have a loveseat designed for her to read & books are piled up on the playmat & bin. She has an ikea bookshelf in her bedroom, but she rarely reads in her bedroom. The bookshelf stores a bunch of board games, card games & puzzles.

They if they are NOT getting used...

If many of them are workbooks, the kid won't read those without adult supervision, so stop getting those if they are getting used. Agree with others suggestions on reading aloud to child. Lots of research on the multiple Ben of this activity.

It's subjective. Also, there's so much humble bragging in some of these posts, including OP's.

People saying 200 books sounds excessive... if you get them cheap and keep them from cluttering up the place (could be true of anything, like toys)... You can fit 2-3 kids' books in a horizontal inch of shelving, so we're talking about, let's see... maybe 6 feet of shelf space? Two 3-foot shelves?

And I guess I don't see how, if space/money/organization aren't the issue, one can ever really have "too many" books. Maybe the wrong *kind* of books, if they aren't being utilized at all. But I don't see how one could say, "Well, 50 books is enough for a 4-year-old" or whatever. Sure, you can make do with any number, but I don't see where there should be a limit, per se. Seems really subjective.

Maybe you and your wife could set up a neighborhood socially distanced book exchange. Then she could get her new books, and you could keep down the clutter and spending.

Huh. When my kid was 4, we had about 1200.

Granted:

-we read about 20 per day (picture books are mostly short)

-we got almost all from the thrift at <$1 each or even free, so it worked out to ~$250/year

-we lived in an apartment, but they were well-organized so didn't add clutter, really (I also did KonMari, so books were the
main thing I HADN'T mostly eliminated)

And, yes, we also went to the library regularly. We just liked books.

I agree it depends on your specific objection, but 200 books generally only takes up one smallish bookcase, if a kid reads or is read 5-10 per day (maybe an hour), 200 books (not counting workbooks) is a month's worth. Kids that age like to re-read things a lot, too, so it's nice to have books they own, if one can afford it.

OP, if your kid can already read, that's all the MORE reason to have lots of books around, though maybe more fiction picture books and easy readers would be better than textbook-like things. It sounds like English may not be your first language but that you live in the US-- again, all the more reason to have a lot of books around.

Pre-covid this would sound excessive at this age, especially given your current use of them. But, now that we aren't using libraries like we used to, it's not too bad. Sounds like an organizational and system issue. Designate the area for books, and limit it to that area. Get some good bookshelves to line an entire wall for example. Get your DD to help you come up with categories so she can get excited about the process and make sure she has access to reach a good number of them. Next, read to her daily. This is your job too, not just your wife's.

If you think 200 books are a problem...

I love books and have tons of them at my house. But if it's cluttering things up and the kid isn't actually reading them, it's reasonable to seek a solution. Stop buying books for a while while you organize the ones you have. Have a couple small shelves in different places in the house with a selection of books on them. Keep the favorites out, but rotate through the others.

Use the library to try new titles -- you don't have to buy every book you want, especially when you don't know what your kid will actually like. Our library in DC offers bundles of picture books on different themes for checkout, even during the pandemic.

It's great to have lots of books, but if you aren't reading to your kid -- and if you and your wife aren't reading in front of your kid, modeling it as an enjoyable activity -- it's not guaranteed to have much benefit. The books can just become part of the decor.

Books in the house are great, but that doesn't mean buying hundreds of books is necessary.

I've read studies that show homes with books promote and encourage readers. As a kid when I'd get really bored I'd grab a book from our bookcase (that nobody every seemed to read) and read it-crazy books way above my level and understanding but I developed a love of reading. Once I was at my grandmother's house and started reading a Danielle Steels book and I was maybe 9 or 10? My grandmother ran to my mother appalled and my mother exclaimed 1. She's reading 2. She doesn't understand those parts (which I didn't and I remember skipping over them) and 3. If she has questions then she'll come to me and I'll explain it (which I did and she did and that continued throughout my adult life and we are very close to this day).

If money is your biggest issue but you can afford it, I’d let it go. Not really great for a marriage to nitpick each other’s spending.

If the issue is clutter, then it’s okay to ask for a solution.

I’m kinda of jealous, lol. I’m the author of the toys thread and I would WAY prefer if my H bought DC workbooks instead of more useless, plastic pieces of crap.