Anonymous wrote:I’m struggling with jealousy a lot these days. I can relate. A lot these of days I’m like eeyore moping around like a kid, it’s so annoying I need to snap out of it.

At least you recognize that, unlike a ton of posters on here who are full of complaints and excuses.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I’m sorry. I could never have married someone whose family disrespected me like that. My mil is lovely and always complements me on how we (her son and I) parent, manage our household, etc. SIL and BIL are not the nicest people but we can mostly ignore them.

Compliments. She COMPLIMENTS you.

Ever heard of autocorrect?

Ever hear of reviewing your writing?

Shut up. This is a website, not a Supreme Court brief. Jesus. How miserable are you?

NP. You're the one telling another adult to shut up. Why are you not just ignoring?

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I’m sorry. I could never have married someone whose family disrespected me like that. My mil is lovely and always complements me on how we (her son and I) parent, manage our household, etc. SIL and BIL are not the nicest people but we can mostly ignore them.

Compliments. She COMPLIMENTS you.

Ever heard of autocorrect?

Ever hear of reviewing your writing?

Shut up. This is a website, not a Supreme Court brief. Jesus. How miserable are you?

I’m struggling with jealousy a lot these days. I can relate. A lot these of days I’m like eeyore moping around like a kid, it’s so annoying I need to snap out of it.

I miss my MIL. Sadly she has passed away.

My BIL was the best part of my family hands down. Sadly he passed away at a young age from cancer.

You pick the whole thing, it isn’t luck. I picked a man AND his family. Unless your partner has chosen to have no contact with his family, you should be planning on the whole group. I’d also not marry someone who tolerating their family treating me poorly. Again, choices.

Anonymous wrote:Sorry people are being so harsh. I know it’s easy to say “well you should have thought of that! You made your choice!” but few of us are taught how to pick a spouse. Plus we’re pressured to marry young, before we gain enough experience to make good choices.

She may have gotten lucky because she saw your experience with your ILs and realized how important it is to pick good ones.

Why does your husband let his family treat you that way?

My FIL, MIL, BIL, and SIL's all treated me like gold from day one. When MIL and FIL passed away I was as devastated as if they were my own parents. They made an effort to treat me as well as they treated their own children, they praised me to the sky, and supported me for the two decades I was fortunate to have them. Today my BIL and SIL's are my best friends. I vowed that I would honor my inlaws by treating my kids spouses as well as I was treated. It is not fake, there are truly loving people and functional families out there.

OP, if you have a loving spouse, that is so much more important than how his family treats you. If you are still struggling with this enough that it’s impacting your ability to be happy for your sister, then you should think about therapy to help give you distance.

I have a very good relationship with my in-laws and it would make me really sad if my sister couldn’t be happy for me and was resentful and jealous.

My ILs were just like your sisters ILs, so kind and loving. The first time I met my MIL she said call me mom and we had our own relationship separate from my husbands and her relationship. To them I was perfect and I used to wish my own family could be like his. Fast forward 10 years later when I found out DH was cheating and confided in MIL/SILs and they were so compassionate. HOWEVER by the time everything was over I found out he had a 3 year old affair baby that the whole family knew about (separate from the women I busted him cheating with. I completely stopped any relationship after they went with my husband and kids on a vacation with current husbands affair partner.

Sorry people are being so harsh. I know it’s easy to say “well you should have thought of that! You made your choice!” but few of us are taught how to pick a spouse. Plus we’re pressured to marry young, before we gain enough experience to make good choices.

She may have gotten lucky because she saw your experience with your ILs and realized how important it is to pick good ones.

Wait until they’re married a few years. This exactly describes how my sisters in laws treated her as newly weds. She was the daughter they always wanted! Fast forward just over 10 years and she’s no longer on speaking terms with them. Not saying this WILL happen but they’re all in a honeymoon period. Things can and probably will change as life gets more complicated - health problems, children, splitting holidays etc.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:You pick the family too. Your sister is smart.

+1 family is part of the package

+2 Growing up my dad used to say "you make your own luck" and I am sharing this with you now, OP. Why has your sister made the decisions she has and you've made the decisions you have? THAT should be your question.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I’m sorry. I could never have married someone whose family disrespected me like that. My mil is lovely and always complements me on how we (her son and I) parent, manage our household, etc. SIL and BIL are not the nicest people but we can mostly ignore them.

Compliments. She COMPLIMENTS you.

Ever heard of autocorrect?

Ever hear of reviewing your writing?