Hell no

My DH was adopted at birth (70s) a complete blank slate medically.

I know my family medical history and it turns out I have a whole range of surprise medical issues that we could never have predicted.

So there is only so much good the basic history can do.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Before getting married?

On the first real date —long story, but we are both mixed ancestry AA. Sickle cell disease/trait status and thalassemia disease/trait status are a critical conversation for dating couples who have African, Arab, and Southern Italian ancestry.

My AA husband is sickle cell carrier. He did not tell me. It only came out when we had a son (we also had a girl but she does not have the trait). We actually got a letter from the DC dept of Health informing us. At that point he "remembered" being a carrier. Our son will have to tell his future partner if they plan to have children.

Are you sure he knew?

No, but I met her Mom and she’s nuttier than a fruitcake at Christmas so we stopped dating. I wasn’t about to get involved with those Fuktards!

Yes, but I only found out a decade later that my parent had a deadly genetic disease that I am 50 percent at risk of inheriting.

No. We got married 12 years ago, and dated for a decade. We were very familiar with each other’s families and didn’t really know of any important medical histories. We chose to do genetic testing but unfortunately did it when I was pregnant rather than trying to conceive. I found out I carry 3 very serious mutations. Due to a lab error we didn’t find out until I was 21 weeks pregnant. We rushed his results and found out he was not a carrier at 24 weeks. It was a huge relief we could have avoided if we’d tested prior to conception. But if I knew he were a carrier or vice versa? I don’t think that would have changed my mind about marrying him.

No. We got engaged at 24. We were pretty serious about marriage and discussed a lot of serious topics like religion, our family's current health status, politics but I have to say this didn't come up and probably should have now that I look back. We did talk about how we would handle prenatal testing and other genetics testing for our kids and results.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Before getting married?

On the first real date —long story, but we are both mixed ancestry AA. Sickle cell disease/trait status and thalassemia disease/trait status are a critical conversation for dating couples who have African, Arab, and Southern Italian ancestry.

My AA husband is sickle cell carrier. He did not tell me. It only came out when we had a son (we also had a girl but she does not have the trait). We actually got a letter from the DC dept of Health informing us. At that point he "remembered" being a carrier. Our son will have to tell his future partner if they plan to have children.

Anonymous wrote:Before getting married?

On the first real date —long story, but we are both mixed ancestry AA. Sickle cell disease/trait status and thalassemia disease/trait status are a critical conversation for dating couples who have African, Arab, and Southern Italian ancestry.

I didn’t think it needs to be a topic unless there is something known like my father has hemophilia or my brother died of cystic fibrosis in his teens.

I didn't know about DH's father's dyslexia.

PP. but many people get carrier testing prior to conception. If he thinks a convo is enough he’s a dummy. If this is coming up because he can’t accept whatever the condition is then that’s a different issue.

No...but honestly talking about this is not as foolproof as people think it is.

Yes. I am a carrier of a known genetic disease.

Wish we had talked about mental disorders in the family. But he would have lied, just like his mother does on it.