This is what social media is for.

Anonymous wrote:I have two good friends with whom I can share the good, bad, and ugly with and they do the same.

Ditto.

If you do share, you gotta be willing to listen. I have a brother-in-law who loves to talk about his kids’ successes - they’re great kids and I love to hear about them. I realized something was off when I knew the names, shortcomings/failures of his kids’ friends.

The Grandpa story *happy tears*

Tell us!

You can brag to me. I'm always happy for my friends' kids when the post their achievements on Facebook.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:... who can you tell? I hate braggers but sometimes my kids do really great things and I can only tell DH! My parents are both deceased and DH’s mom is very defensive about her daughter’s kids and takes anything I say as a challenge to them.

This might only works if you're Catholic but my kid's Grandpa is always bragging about the kids to Grandma. Grandma died before they were born, but he tells the kids "Tonight, at bedtime, I'm going to tell Grandma about your spelling grade." and then the next day he'll say "I told Grandma . . . "

My kids love it. They beam with pride.

Oh my god. I just teared up. What an amazing Grandpa!

Anonymous wrote:... who can you tell? I hate braggers but sometimes my kids do really great things and I can only tell DH! My parents are both deceased and DH’s mom is very defensive about her daughter’s kids and takes anything I say as a challenge to them.

This might only works if you're Catholic but my kid's Grandpa is always bragging about the kids to Grandma. Grandma died before they were born, but he tells the kids "Tonight, at bedtime, I'm going to tell Grandma about your spelling grade." and then the next day he'll say "I told Grandma . . . "

My kids love it. They beam with pride.

I really don’t like listening to people who constantly brag about their kids. Sadly, those kids often don’t amount to much. I’m proud of my kids but I just share that with my husband and my parents.

Anonymous wrote:Childless friends. That’s who I brag to, and also talk to about my child’s many issues, because they aren’t competitive and are more supportive than my parent friends most of the time.

And then they tell their other childless friends how obnoxious parents are about their kids!

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Childless friends. That’s who I brag to, and also talk to about my child’s many issues, because they aren’t competitive and are more supportive than my parent friends most of the time.

Plus one. And honestly they have less skin in the game so can give you honest perspective on troubles and triumphs.

Or friends with totally different aged kids. So, e.g., when my kids were little, I had a work friend who was older with kids in their late teens. She loved to hear about cute little kid things (actually asked for cute stories) and really seemed to develop a fondness (from afar) for my kids. It was nice.

I now have a younger colleague with little kids, and I ask her for cute stories. She can brag about her little ones to me any time. And likewise, she seems ok hearing about things my older kids are doing. I think because the kids are so far apart in age/experience there's no danger of "competitiveness."

Anonymous wrote:Keep a diary as a graduation gift for each kids. Gushing in the journal helps me tone down my enthusiasm for DC1, who has just learned to ride a big boy bike. He’s old enough to remember the milestone, but I hope my entry will bring it back.

If you couldn’t tell, I am dealing with my own gushing issues today. But seriously, the journal helps me not to blab to all my friends. Doubles as a great gift.

Keep a diary as a graduation gift for each kids. Gushing in the journal helps me tone down my enthusiasm for DC1, who has just learned to ride a big boy bike. He’s old enough to remember the milestone, but I hope my entry will bring it back.

Anonymous wrote:Tell your kids! If you still feel the need to tell others beyond your kids and husband, you do have external validation issues.

Yes, your kids. And focus on how hard they worked for the achievement not the achievement itself.

I'm sorry to hear that about your parents, OP. I usually tell my mom. Sometimes I talk to other adults involved. My daughter just gave a very sweet answer in front of the church about the nature of love the other day, and I talked with my mom, DH, and our priest. It's funny that you can't talk to other parents about it, but people are competitive about everything.

Kids, dh, and my mom. If it's a really big thing I have a couple friends I would tell (and they share similarly). Sometimes I post something on FB like when DS got a promotion in his martial arts but most of my friends post things like that.