This tread makes me so happy because I know I’m not alone.

Yall need to learn how to say "ask your father."

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Well, it's a 24/7 job so... I am sure you knew that.

Nope. We are not servants. Our “job” is to help them become good, resilient, self sufficient adults.

And that takes parenting, which takes time, which you choose not to give them so they are needier as you haven't worked with them and they have to figure it out on their own.

Yup.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Holy Crap OP. This is my life too.

Mine are 5th, 8th and 8th graders. I think i hear "MOM!" about 30 times a day.

Meanwhile my husband is working from the "Bubble that cannot be disturbed" in the attic from 7am to 7pm each day.

+1

DH went back into the office in June. He “needed more space”

9th and 4th.

And my clients whine even worse than my kids.

They at least show gratitude, but the idea that they can manage DL on their own is a joke.

Why do you allow your husbands to check out? Next time your kid asks for you, tell them to ask dad.

Anonymous wrote:Well, it's a 24/7 job so... I am sure you knew that.

Nope. We are not servants. Our “job” is to help them become good, resilient, self sufficient adults.

Anonymous wrote:Holy Crap OP. This is my life too.

Mine are 5th, 8th and 8th graders. I think i hear "MOM!" about 30 times a day.

Meanwhile my husband is working from the "Bubble that cannot be disturbed" in the attic from 7am to 7pm each day.

+1

DH went back into the office in June. He “needed more space”

9th and 4th.

And my clients whine even worse than my kids.

They at least show gratitude, but the idea that they can manage DL on their own is a joke.

There is a sign on my home office door that says “Think VERY HARD about whether knocking on this door is a good idea”. I will give teenagers the Mommy Death Glare and say “do you really think knocking on my door was a good idea? No? Me neither”.

That said, I WFH 3 days a week even pre-COVID. Now WFH FT. And my kids always came home from school, dropped backpacks, knocked on my door and talked to me for 10-15 minutes. I could hear about their day and touch base with what they needed to do while I finished work.

During online school I checkin briefly in the morning, cross paths with them at lunch, and ask them to come by and see me “after school” and tell me about their day. And I’m glad to help out then or chit chat.

Outside these times, they need to ask themselves whether knocking is really a good idea. I don’t interrupt online classes to fuss about dishes not done. I expect them to treat my work with similar respect.

Nobody needs to be yelling Mom! Full stop. We have two teleworkers and two telelearners and you don’t disrupt three other people because you don’t feel like walking upstairs and knocking on my door.

Also, I see zero problem with saying “I can’t right now. You either need to wait for an hour or ask your father”. Given the demands of our jobs, he is every bit as able to help as me.

Look, we are six months into this and could be here all school year. You put 2-3 kids in a house for school plus two adults trying to work and either you develop boundaries or you go crazy.

Also, noise cancelling headphones.

I have a rule that if they ask me to find something and I can find it within 30 seconds they owe me money from their allowance because they just “stole” MY time instead of using their brains and their eyes.

Anonymous wrote:Same here! Two teens only know how to ask Mom for help and both seem to respect Dad’s WFH space. WTF? It never stops. Sometimes when I go into the bathroom for some “me time,” the dog noses her way in. But at least the pooch (usually) is not asking me for something other than an ear scratch. I think the dog is trying to escape the chaos too.

My DH isn’t even working! They’re like “oh well Dad was in the middle of a race <PlayStation> and he probably wouldn’t know anyways <true sadly>”

Same here! Two teens only know how to ask Mom for help and both seem to respect Dad’s WFH space. WTF? It never stops. Sometimes when I go into the bathroom for some “me time,” the dog noses her way in. But at least the pooch (usually) is not asking me for something other than an ear scratch. I think the dog is trying to escape the chaos too.

Yes parenting is relentless

Thank you for posting this OP. It helps to know that I’m not alone.

This is me, except my kids are younger - 6, 8 and 10 (almost 11). I’m so so so tired of never being able to go pee without being interrupted. I *need* them to go to school but it’s remote.

Drives me bat s*^t crazy. Especially when they ask me instead of husband/their father about computer issues when that is his FIELD!! It has taken about 10+ years to make some headway on that.