I’m sorry, OP. That’s really hard.

Mine passed 3 weeks apart. Dad couldn’t last after mom passed away. He simply gave up.

My folks have been dead for a few years now. It doesn't get better. You have been hit with the reality that your time will be up next. Life is a downward spiral from here.

OP, thinking of it this way helped after the death of my mother: As a daughter, I missed my mother. It hurt so much. But she was also a daughter. She was a daughter who lost her mother. A long, long time ago. There is no reason for me to think it hurt any less. And it's been so many long years. She now has the opportunity to be reunited with her own mother, to be in her mother's arms, with the mother she loved so much. I need to be ok with this.

Anonymous wrote:My parents died 11 months apart. It’s mind numbing and I really didn’t grieve until after the second parent died. Hugs to you. It’s a process.

My parents died 6 months apart. 5 months after my dad died, I was feeling like I would be able to move forward through my grief. A week later, my mom was diagnosed with stage 4 cancer and died three weeks later. My mother's death has taken a piece of me...if that makes sense. I am always aware of her loss, even though I have grieved and moved on. Op, I am sorry for your pain. Losing ones parents is heartbreaking, no matter the circumstances and, when both of them are gone, it opens up all kinds of existential issues.

I'm so sorry, OP. Awful. My dad was one of those vibrant people struck down with cancer...a tough 18 month battle. I as a zombie. It's been 2.5 years and still tough. I can't imagine losing both parents so close together.

I have read a lot about the 'adult orphan'. There are many books out there about the feeling when both parents are gone. They describe an 'unmoored' feeling. Parents are the ones that provide unconditional love no matter what (when you are lucky enough to be born to a great set). Spouses can always leave or desert you, but that parental love is so comforting.

I’m sorry, op. That’s really rough. I also lost both my parents close together. Go easy on yourself and don’t second guess how you are handling it (whether that’s thinking you should be more or less affected.) it was over a year before I started to feel like myself again.