Anonymous wrote:Ice breakers are dumb. I have 2 bachelor's and a master's and several certifications and recently for asked at work what superhero I was. I wanted to respond "I don't give a f* what superhero I am or my coworkers are; I have work to do and you're wasting my time." But I smiled and said I'm Catwoman and I survived the whole ordeal because that's what people do. I'm glad he learned early that this is just what you do, even if you think it's dumb.

And learning teammates' names is arguably a lot less dumb than what superhero they are. Being able to yell out "Mike--I'm open!" or understand what to do if the coach says "Kemaris, John, and Evan--go scrimmage while I work with Carlo and Tim" makes the team more effective.

OP, your kid was disrespectful. It's ok to get embarrassed. It's not ok to let your shame come out as rudeness. This is an important life lesson. It sounds like the coach tried to give him an out (encouraging him to ask what a kid's name was, which is a good thing to feel comfortable doing...certainly I've had to swallow my embarrassment at times and say to someone "I'm so sorry, but can you remind me of your name?") and your kid just dug a deeper hole. I'd focus with your son on how he can listen so he learns the kids' names, and how to be polite even when he's feeling awkward. If you're going to argue with the coach about discipline and tell your kid he doesn't have to do what the rest of the team is doing, it would be better to just take your kid off the team right now.

My son plays baseball with a mix of boys ages 7-9 and I can’t imagine any of them responding like this to the coach or any other adult helping out. One time we had player throwing a fit about playing a certain position and started to argue with coach and his dad immediately came over and told him he would be happy to take him home if he didn’t want to play and he’d let his all stars coach know he wasn’t interested in playing either. The kid never said another word about not wanting to play that position.

Wow my DH has coached boys rec soccer for many seasons and I have never heard of a kid being that rude. Serious yikes.

Your DS is a brat and talked back. Raise him better to respect adults

Anonymous wrote:If this remotely bothers you OP, neither you nor your kid are cut out for sports.

+1

Anonymous wrote:When my kids are fighting at home, I make them run 2 laps around the block. I just started this during covid and it works here.

We also run laps here. It's used as a logical consequence, as in "You are mouthing off because you clearly have extra energy you need to burn. Go run <X reasonable number for time of day/kid> of laps around the block." We also started during covid. It also helps - a lot, actually.

Anonymous wrote:Team coach.

OP your kid was displaying poor and disrespectful behavior. If he's part of a team, he need to be respectful of the other kids (and the coach!).

+1
Responding like that to an adult he had just met? Yikes.

A coach is not just a coach, he is an adult helping shape kids lives- teaching them how to operate in a team atmosphere and have respect for each other.

I get on my kids when they say "I don't care" because i personally think its disrespectful.

If a coach has no consequences, then kids (especially 8yo boys who are testing boundaries) will continue to be disrespectful. What would you prefer- push ups? Hit him on the arm? Running laps is an acceptable way for a coach to show what is or isnt allowed on his team. Then the other kids stop participating and hes lost the entire practice.

If you dont like it, change teams to a coach who is less tough, but that may not benefit your ds in the long run.

Alot of these kids are so unconditioned from loss of activity that they can stand to run a lap...or 5.

I think it was rude for your son to say that- soccer is not just soccer and if he cant conform to a team environment then possibly he doesn't need to play.

Im not a coach- mom of a 8yo son who plays soccer and appreciates the few male figures in his life (besides dad).

When my kids are fighting at home, I make them run 2 laps around the block. I just started this during covid and it works here.

Ice breakers are dumb. I have 2 bachelor's and a master's and several certifications and recently for asked at work what superhero I was. I wanted to respond "I don't give a f* what superhero I am or my coworkers are; I have work to do and you're wasting my time." But I smiled and said I'm Catwoman and I survived the whole ordeal because that's what people do. I'm glad he learned early that this is just what you do, even if you think it's dumb.

Learning your teammates names is NOT babyish. It is critical.

I would have backed up the coach and had my son do another lap at the end before we left to go home.

It’s really, really easy to run a couple laps.

Anonymous wrote:DS 8 had his first soccer practice last night on a new team. The coach was playing some game trying to help the kids learn each other names. Like kick the ball and say their name. I’ll admit it was a little bit babyish. My DS couldn’t remember any of the names so coach pointed to a kid and said “hey, why don’t you ask him to tell you his name.” My DS was kind of rude and said “I don’t really care what his name is.” I think he just thought the game was silly. The coach got upset and made my DS dribble the ball around the soccer field once. Honestly this just upset my DS more and he was pretty mouthy the rest of the practice. I do not think the coach handled this way. My DS didn’t know a kids name, on the first day of practice, and then got embarrassed, so he said something stupid. DH thinks I should leave it alone, but the “running laps” As punishment thing is really bothering me. I didn’t think coaches still did that.

Your son is a little brat. And if he ever works at a summer camp or goes to a college (or high school) orientation, he’ll be expected to play “silly” icebreaker games like that.

Anonymous wrote:This is exactly what happened on my team growing up. One lap for any mouthy remark. One lap for every minute you show up late. etc. etc. I would talk to your kid about improving behavior/not being rude. If not, I'd just leave the team.

Yep. The coach was in the right. This is a sport. It requires physical fitness, discipline, and following directions. Running extra laps, doing pushups, extra drills, etc. is entirely appropriate as a consequence- and very effective. Sure your son may have hated it, but if he wants to stay on the team and his behavior is buying him a lot of extra laps, he will cut it out real quick.