Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:What are the different between the three? Are all three explicitly defined when you're with someone? Does the guy usually initiate each?

Grown-up people who are negotiating these questions talk to each other. Please, please, please do not wait on a man to initiate a conversation about the status of your relationship. If you want to have that conversation, bring it up. It is unfair to assume that he has the same set of understandings as you, and you are entirely likely to get your feelings hurt.

Just seems like after a few months it's almost assumed

Never assume

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:What are the different between the three? Are all three explicitly defined when you're with someone? Does the guy usually initiate each?

Grown-up people who are negotiating these questions talk to each other. Please, please, please do not wait on a man to initiate a conversation about the status of your relationship. If you want to have that conversation, bring it up. It is unfair to assume that he has the same set of understandings as you, and you are entirely likely to get your feelings hurt.

Just seems like after a few months it's almost assumed

Anonymous wrote:What are the different between the three? Are all three explicitly defined when you're with someone? Does the guy usually initiate each?

Grown-up people who are negotiating these questions talk to each other. Please, please, please do not wait on a man to initiate a conversation about the status of your relationship. If you want to have that conversation, bring it up. It is unfair to assume that he has the same set of understandings as you, and you are entirely likely to get your feelings hurt.

It makes me think of early days with my now husband. 20 years ago we met through mutual friends and started causally hanging out in college (“hey, if you’re at x thing Sat night maybe I’ll see you there!”) We kissed at one event. I then went to buy tickets to a show he was in. As I walked away someone said “did you see that woman? That was Ben’s...” I wanted to run back and hear whether I was his girlfriend or fling or stalker etc! A few days later he asked if I’d be his girlfriend.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:“How? We both took down our dating profiles”

So next opportunity for a casual conversation, say “hey, I have a question. We both took down our profiles but never really discussed what that means. What does it mean for you? “

Is it OK over dinner?

Over dinner in private - like in your home or his, or perhaps at a park over a picnic are fine. Not great at a restaurant because those are crowded and have interuptions.

What do you expect to discuss? If he never brings it up do you assume he's not too interested?

Anonymous wrote:The sex progressively goes down!

Sadly true.

Doesn't work this way for me. I don't sleep with the multiple people and if I really like a woman, give it my best effort. It's so difficult to meet a compatible person so why complicate it with urban professional BS?

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:“How? We both took down our dating profiles”

So next opportunity for a casual conversation, say “hey, I have a question. We both took down our profiles but never really discussed what that means. What does it mean for you? “

Is it OK over dinner?

Over dinner in private - like in your home or his, or perhaps at a park over a picnic are fine. Not great at a restaurant because those are crowded and have interuptions.

Anonymous wrote:How do you know he took his profile down?

Look withine hidden