Anonymous wrote:No, you cannot move the jurisdiction. It will always be under the jurisdiction of the Virginia court.

Anonymous wrote:Gold-digging much?

Anonymous wrote:Child support would move to where the paying parent lives. As long as you lived in VA they would continue to retain jurisdiction, but now that neither of you live there, the location of the parent who pays support would determine jurisdiction for child support. For custody, it would be where you live, but not support.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:There is a lot of incorrect advice on here. Answers to your questions below:

1. No, you cannot move the order to DC. VA has jurisdiction to continue to enforce the order but if you have both left the state it cannot modify the order. If you are seeking to modify the order his home state will have continuing exclusive jurisdiction. The only caveat here is if you both consent to VA having CEJ.
2. Child support will be based on his state's guidelines subject to the caveat above.
3. Impossible to tell because you did not identify his state. As a general matter though your need to have a child with severe disabilities to have private school paid for.

This makes no sense. If OP moves to DC and files, it will go to DC as that is the child's home state. If Dad is not in VA anymore then VA will not take jurisdiction. If a child has severe disabilities then OP hires an advocate to get the school system to pay for the private and no private will be $40K - try $60-80K for special needs.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:There is a lot of incorrect advice on here. Answers to your questions below:

1. No, you cannot move the order to DC. VA has jurisdiction to continue to enforce the order but if you have both left the state it cannot modify the order. If you are seeking to modify the order his home state will have continuing exclusive jurisdiction. The only caveat here is if you both consent to VA having CEJ.
2. Child support will be based on his state's guidelines subject to the caveat above.
3. Impossible to tell because you did not identify his state. As a general matter though your need to have a child with severe disabilities to have private school paid for.

Many thanks for this! He moved to a state in west coast since separation. The child never lives there. That is why I filed the case in VA where I live. So the question is if we leave VA whether we would have to keep asking VA for any future issues regarding the child support. The child support needs to be reviewed periodically I think? I would not mind receiving less if my income share is now higher or whatever reasons. I find it weird the same amount should be paid for 10+ years.

It goes by guidelines so you can file and get a review but you also risk it going down if the formula changed or his income has gone down or your income has gone up. You'd file where you live. If you move to DC you can file there but its doubtful they'd change it to 21 given your original divorce decree probably says till age 18. It makes no sense to move to DC from VA when child goes to school in MD except if you work in DC.

You can probably move as no court is going to hold you accountable as the custodial parent given Dad is no longer in the area.

No court is going to give you private school and activities on top of child support except if it is in your original court order. That is all included.

Thanks again! The move to DC is indeed based on commute reasons - it is mid way between the school and my work in downtown with easy public transport options. Theoretically I can also move to MD but the commute would not be as good. The child support issue only comes to my mind in recent days as the school has announced fall plans and it seems that the move needs to be firmed. It is not a legal arbitrage as a starting point. I only learned about the 21 v.s. 18 difference in these two days when researching the jurisdiction issue online.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:There is a lot of incorrect advice on here. Answers to your questions below:

1. No, you cannot move the order to DC. VA has jurisdiction to continue to enforce the order but if you have both left the state it cannot modify the order. If you are seeking to modify the order his home state will have continuing exclusive jurisdiction. The only caveat here is if you both consent to VA having CEJ.
2. Child support will be based on his state's guidelines subject to the caveat above.
3. Impossible to tell because you did not identify his state. As a general matter though your need to have a child with severe disabilities to have private school paid for.

Many thanks for this! He moved to a state in west coast since separation. The child never lives there. That is why I filed the case in VA where I live. So the question is if we leave VA whether we would have to keep asking VA for any future issues regarding the child support. The child support needs to be reviewed periodically I think? I would not mind receiving less if my income share is now higher or whatever reasons. I find it weird the same amount should be paid for 10+ years.

It goes by guidelines so you can file and get a review but you also risk it going down if the formula changed or his income has gone down or your income has gone up. You'd file where you live. If you move to DC you can file there but its doubtful they'd change it to 21 given your original divorce decree probably says till age 18. It makes no sense to move to DC from VA when child goes to school in MD except if you work in DC.

You can probably move as no court is going to hold you accountable as the custodial parent given Dad is no longer in the area.

No court is going to give you private school and activities on top of child support except if it is in your original court order. That is all included.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Per point 3, child support is formulaic and doesn’t include anything about child support. That would normally be covered elsewhere in a marriage settlement agreement. If you were never married, no dice. No court will compel him to pay private school. It doesn’t work that way.

If a child was in private during the marriage and the parent can afford it, then it can be ordered in the divorce. However, mom has sole custody, Dad didn't agree to private or paying for private so she can use the child support and her income to pay. If she signed up for private she can clearly afford it.

The parent being able to “afford it” is pretty subjective.

Divorce often leads to all sorts of belt tightening because there are now two households to support, and often big legal bills to pay. Switching to public is an easy and common way for costs to be cut, so I wouldn’t count on a court order mandating private if one parent doesn’t want to pay for it.

Anonymous wrote:OP. Many thanks for the responses. Yes I will consult my lawyer but the hourly rate is 500! I have done some research on the internet also and try to get some ideas from here.

I am very grateful that I can support my self and my child with just my own income. During the 5 or 6 years we were separated no child support was provided at all as I did not file a case for it (various reasons including stints being overseas). The father never talks to the child after the child support agreement (an only a couple times in the separated years) and stopped responding to emails or calls (no issue from me for visitation but just no request at all). The private school we got accepted tried to contact and could not reach him either. We maintained separate finances during the marriage and the marriage settlement is just an agreement to dissolve the marriage without any alimony or financial dealings. The annual child support is about 5-6 percent of his annual gross income, which is 1.5-2 times of mine.

Yes the decision to attend private school is mine as I feel it might provide better development opportunities for the child. I am fortunate to be able to afford it myself, but it does not mean no financial pressure from somewhere else, especially now the child is also having more expensive extra curriculum activities such as piano at Levine and art classes. No extra curriculum activities are included in the current child support agreement at all. I am just trying to figure out if legally there is ground for the father to shoulder a bit more, as he is financially much stronger than me. I will talk to my attorney definitely and hopefully can help others with similar situations.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:There is a lot of incorrect advice on here. Answers to your questions below:

1. No, you cannot move the order to DC. VA has jurisdiction to continue to enforce the order but if you have both left the state it cannot modify the order. If you are seeking to modify the order his home state will have continuing exclusive jurisdiction. The only caveat here is if you both consent to VA having CEJ.
2. Child support will be based on his state's guidelines subject to the caveat above.
3. Impossible to tell because you did not identify his state. As a general matter though your need to have a child with severe disabilities to have private school paid for.

Many thanks for this! He moved to a state in west coast since separation. The child never lives there. That is why I filed the case in VA where I live. So the question is if we leave VA whether we would have to keep asking VA for any future issues regarding the child support. The child support needs to be reviewed periodically I think? I would not mind receiving less if my income share is now higher or whatever reasons. I find it weird the same amount should be paid for 10+ years.

Anonymous wrote:There is a lot of incorrect advice on here. Answers to your questions below:

1. No, you cannot move the order to DC. VA has jurisdiction to continue to enforce the order but if you have both left the state it cannot modify the order. If you are seeking to modify the order his home state will have continuing exclusive jurisdiction. The only caveat here is if you both consent to VA having CEJ.
2. Child support will be based on his state's guidelines subject to the caveat above.
3. Impossible to tell because you did not identify his state. As a general matter though your need to have a child with severe disabilities to have private school paid for.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Per point 3, child support is formulaic and doesn’t include anything about child support. That would normally be covered elsewhere in a marriage settlement agreement. If you were never married, no dice. No court will compel him to pay private school. It doesn’t work that way.

If a child was in private during the marriage and the parent can afford it, then it can be ordered in the divorce. However, mom has sole custody, Dad didn't agree to private or paying for private so she can use the child support and her income to pay. If she signed up for private she can clearly afford it.

Anonymous wrote:There is a lot of incorrect advice on here. Answers to your questions below:

1. No, you cannot move the order to DC. VA has jurisdiction to continue to enforce the order but if you have both left the state it cannot modify the order. If you are seeking to modify the order his home state will have continuing exclusive jurisdiction. The only caveat here is if you both consent to VA having CEJ.
2. Child support will be based on his state's guidelines subject to the caveat above.
3. Impossible to tell because you did not identify his state. As a general matter though your need to have a child with severe disabilities to have private school paid for.