Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:HHI is currently $280k. We are very comfortably middle class with two kids and no debt, but wouldn't have been able to afford our house without downpayment help from parents.

LOL. You are not middle class by any definition. You are in the 1%.

This is the problem. The people OP is comparing him or her self to are are not middle class.

Your idea of what "middle class" can afford is what is totally off. We can afford all of the things on your list, but we make $350K not $180K.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:HHI is currently $280k. We are very comfortably middle class with two kids and no debt, but wouldn't have been able to afford our house without downpayment help from parents.

LOL. You are not middle class by any definition. You are in the 1%.

NP, and I agree. But I think this is one of the challenges of living in this area, that we all end up with strange ideas about what middle class is, both in terms of money and in terms of what we have. I'm in a similar income bracket as OP, and I have to remind myself regularly that what I see around me (million dollar houses, families taking lots of expensive vacations) is not what middle class really is.

Debt can be OK if you manage it well. Do you expect to move up in your careers? Most people do, so the $180k you make now might be $350k in 5 years if you both get promoted. Not all jobs are like this, but many are, so OK to take on some debt now (mortgage) and save less now, if you can be good about handling it later once your income goes up.

Do you have student loans? I can't figure out your math.

Honestly, I'm wondering where your money goes. Our mortgage is lower than your rent, but we save about 40k a year after maxing retirement.

Anonymous wrote:HHI is currently $280k. We are very comfortably middle class with two kids and no debt, but wouldn't have been able to afford our house without downpayment help from parents.

LOL. You are not middle class by any definition. You are in the 1%.

Anonymous wrote:HHI is currently $280k. We are very comfortably middle class with two kids and no debt, but wouldn't have been able to afford our house without downpayment help from parents.

*no debt besides mortgage, I should say.

HHI is currently $280k. We are very comfortably middle class with two kids and no debt, but wouldn't have been able to afford our house without downpayment help from parents.

I lucked out on real estate and being an early employee in an IPO company in my 20s. No family money except they paid for undergrad. I'm not wealthy at all but college funding for the kids is complete, and I own my home. I still work and will until I'm in my 60s. I wonder if some of the Gen Z folx will make their fortunes on some crazy post-pandemic gold rush...

You don't have to put 20% down. With the interest rates being so low, it would actually be a bit foolish to put that much cash down on a house. When my DH and I were just starting out in this area, I was making 50k gross and my DH was still in school. I saved and saved and we were able to buy a starter home 5 years later (FHA loan so low down payment). DH eventually graduated and started making good money and we started saving up for a larger home zoned for better schools. We upped our savings rate as our incomes grew. That took another 5 years. Automatic direct deposit to savings and pretend like that money isn't there. Others also get lucky and buy in an area that appreciated ALOT. We were not so lucky but had very disciplined savings and smart investments.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP. I feel you. It is harder than you think on that kind of salary.

Just looking at your post...maybe you are oversaving on retirement if you are maxing out? And maybe you don't need new clothes all the time?

I mean I hardly ever buy new clothes, and if I do, probably once every year or two at places like TJMaxx or Marshalls or at outlets. I rarely buy new clothes. My phone is a cheap $150 Nokia and we don't even own a TV so no cable bills. We are actually very low consumerists, but I just can't figure out how people find their retirements and pay for everything else. Oh, and thank God we don't have medical problems or an injury yet.


I mean maybe we save too much for retirement. Worst case scenario would be to tap savings to help pay for a house and you pay yourself back with interest that goes back to you.

How much do you take home per month? It doesn’t make sense that your expenses are as low as you say, you only pay $1700/month in rent, and you can’t save at *least* 2k per month. At that rate, it’s only a few years before you’ll have a down payment. You don’t have to put 20% down.

Anonymous wrote:OP. I feel you. It is harder than you think on that kind of salary.

Just looking at your post...maybe you are oversaving on retirement if you are maxing out? And maybe you don't need new clothes all the time?

I mean I hardly ever buy new clothes, and if I do, probably once every year or two at places like TJMaxx or Marshalls or at outlets. I rarely buy new clothes. My phone is a cheap $150 Nokia and we don't even own a TV so no cable bills. We are actually very low consumerists, but I just can't figure out how people find their retirements and pay for everything else. Oh, and thank God we don't have medical problems or an injury yet.


I mean maybe we save too much for retirement. Worst case scenario would be to tap savings to help pay for a house and you pay yourself back with interest that goes back to you.

They're more comfortable with debt than you are and aren't maxing out retirement. A lot of people pull back on retirement savings to afford a house. Also, they probably have family wealth - no student loans, help with down payment, maybe even large gift cards ($500+) to clothing stores for birthdays/holidays.

Driving a new car every 5 years and buying fancy new clothes all the time is considered middle class? That's your problem - you think the average joe and jane is doing this and feel inadequate. Hint - the people doing this are either not middle class, or they have a lot of debt.