Anonymous
Post 06/22/2020 17:03     Subject: Re:What are you doing if you live across the country from your parents?
Anonymous wrote:I haven't seen my parents (75) , who live in Northern California, since August. They are not willing to fly here and we are not willing to fly there. I am definitely not doing a week-long drive to California with two kids ages 4 and 6. They live in the middle of nowhere, in a house filled with breakables, with no toys and nothing to do for my kids. They don't live near any family either. They are not involved Grandparents and their idea of a good visit is the kids watching TV while they are on their ipads. There would be nothing for us to do if we were to stay with them for awhile. Even when we go for a week during spring break normally we are bored after a few days.

I don't think we'll be able to see each other until next summer probably. Maybe even longer than that. It sucks but I don't see an alternative. They are the ones who chose to move away and retire out there, knowing full well that it would be incredibly difficult for us to go out and see them there.


Sounds like my family. I thought of renting a van and sleeping in it to avoid hotels and flights, but if anything went wrong, it would be bad. Not to mention sleeping in a hot van would not be good in the middle of summer.
Anonymous
Post 06/22/2020 16:55     Subject: What are you doing if you live across the country from your parents?
We aren't going. We are considering going to our pool when it opens soon, and we do small (2 family) gatherings with neighbors setting up tables across the patio and BYO. All that feels risky enough with a road trip or being in close quarters with seniors.
Anonymous
Post 06/22/2020 16:53     Subject: Re:What are you doing if you live across the country from your parents?
My parents live on the West coast and I'm not seeing them this year, which sucks because they are pushing 80. I feel like I may never see them again, depending on how long this lasts. They probably don't want me to visit because they don't want the risk.
Anonymous
Post 06/22/2020 15:41     Subject: Re:What are you doing if you live across the country from your parents?
Flying to see them this summer - will quarantine a week before seeing them and will try to get tested.
Anonymous
Post 06/22/2020 14:58     Subject: What are you doing if you live across the country from your parents?
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:I would get tested before leaving and stay at a hotel for a week and tested again after the week.


Is it possible to get tested just to go on vacation? Or are you fabricating some kind of exposure or symptoms to get a test?


My doctor and the kids' pediatricians are offering essentially on-demand testing. You need an appt but don't need exposure or symptoms.
Anonymous
Post 06/22/2020 14:56     Subject: What are you doing if you live across the country from your parents?
Anonymous wrote:I would get tested before leaving and stay at a hotel for a week and tested again after the week.


Is it possible to get tested just to go on vacation? Or are you fabricating some kind of exposure or symptoms to get a test?
Anonymous
Post 06/22/2020 14:54     Subject: What are you doing if you live across the country from your parents?
Anonymous wrote:
It is probable there might be new restrictions towards the end of summer because of renewed viral spread as states reopen.

So if you want to travel, it's best to do so sooner rather than later, whether it's just a short visit or a visit that could possibly extend for months. Consider where it would be best to stay long-term, all of you at your parents', or all of you here.

Travel will become progressively riskier throughout the summer and fall. That's my point.




This. We're doing it now. Or next week, rather. My dad has been working but we have largely been at home. That will change in a few weeks and I'm much more worried about us bringing something to them, so I'd rather go when our exposure risk is still low.
Anonymous
Post 06/22/2020 13:50     Subject: What are you doing if you live across the country from your parents?
We are flying to see them in two weeks. We'll stay until school starts.
Anonymous
Post 06/22/2020 10:36     Subject: What are you doing if you live across the country from your parents?
Anonymous wrote:My folks are in California. As of now, I am planning to fly out for two weeks in August with DS. We will most likely not stay with my parents but have socially distanced visits in the back yard. It defeats the purpose of giving me some relief while trying to work and watch DS but at least I'll get to see them. My parents are 80 and while they are youthful and in good shape, my mom had a very serious cancer scare so I'm not ok with not seeing them.

My other approach is trying to convince DH that it's time to move out there.


We are in the same boat but hard to leave as Fed SES right now.
Anonymous
Post 06/22/2020 10:02     Subject: Re:What are you doing if you live across the country from your parents?
A lot of phone calls and instacart for my 80+ parents in CA. It’s hard. Husband was thinking of fly there for Xmas but I don’t think it’d be safe then. It was hard to be cross country before covid and now I think about not having enough time with them for me, and for my kids (only grandkids) to really know them while they are still functional. 😢
Anonymous
Post 06/22/2020 09:57     Subject: What are you doing if you live across the country from your parents?
Anonymous wrote:My parents, who are in their 80s but in good shape, are flying East in July to spend August at the family beach house where my family and my sister's family will be. Everyone but my parents are nervous about this but my parents are so bored and so miss their family that they are willing to risk it. When I suggested that we stay in separate houses, my mom wouldn't hear of it. Basically, she would rather die having seen her kids and grandkids than not seeing them at all in the foreseeable future.
I am much much more afraid of us infecting them than vice versa.
My in-laws are travelling here right before then. We plan to do a full quarantine for 6 days, get tested, then tell them to come (or not) as soon as we have the results. After that, we head to the beach so hopefully, all will be clear.


Yikes. Good that you all are getting pre-tested. August will be leading into climbing numbers worst than April. Your parents might catch something at the airport to/from. How would they (and you) manage post vacay if they fall ill? I would caution against getting together and plan for a big family reunion to look forward to next year. If the beach house is an annual tradition it will feel out of routine- but we are in a pandemic.
Anonymous
Post 06/22/2020 09:55     Subject: What are you doing if you live across the country from your parents?
I would get tested before leaving and stay at a hotel for a week and tested again after the week.
Anonymous
Post 06/22/2020 09:51     Subject: What are you doing if you live across the country from your parents?
My mother lives in the Midwest and we're driving to meet her halfway in a couple of weeks. We're tightening up our social distancing beforehand and are staying in an Airbnb where the owner's posted her sanitizing protocols (deep cleaning, at least one day empty between each round of guests, etc.). It's a cabin so not close to other houses and we plan to take our groceries with us so we can just stay there. There's some risk, yes, but I suspect things will get much worse again this winter.
Anonymous
Post 06/22/2020 09:47     Subject: What are you doing if you live across the country from your parents?
Siiiiick
Anonymous
Post 06/22/2020 09:45     Subject: Re:What are you doing if you live across the country from your parents?
We live in VA near my parents, but my ILs live in FL. I don’t think we will do this, this summer, but at some point in the next year we might rent an RV and drive down to visit them and find some kind of campground to stay at near them and only see them outdoors at 6+ ft apart etc.