Anonymous
Post 05/30/2020 11:14     Subject: How many people are actually having affairs?
No idea if they survived the pandemic but at least a half dozen guys I know from work were having affairs or randomly sleeping with women when traveling and at least one female acquaintance was sleeping with a married man (they knew each other from their kids’ school). I also know of three marriages that imploded in the last 18 months over affairs (each couple had 3 kids and SAH wives). Two of the men had long term (10 yr plus) affairs where lunches and going to the gym/working late or early provided plenty of opportunity. The 3rd had an affair with a much younger colleague and got her pregnant with twins.
Anonymous
Post 05/30/2020 10:54     Subject: How many people are actually having affairs?
I don't think most people talk about if they are having affairs. You just really don't know.
Anonymous
Post 05/30/2020 10:53     Subject: How many people are actually having affairs?
Anonymous wrote:How many? A very low percentage of those with a good married sex life. A very high percentage (and about 100% of these men) with a poor married sex life.


+100
Anonymous
Post 05/30/2020 10:52     Subject: Re:How many people are actually having affairs?
I’m in an open marriage. Some of our friends know but not many because people are very judgmental. My spouse is friendly with my lover and I am friendly with my spouse’s. It’s not really open. More poly.
Anonymous
Post 05/30/2020 10:21     Subject: Re:How many people are actually having affairs?
I'm in an open marriage. It's not something I share with my friends, and neither do most of the otherwise-normal couples I know who are in open marriages. You just really wouldn't know because there's no reason to.
Anonymous
Post 05/30/2020 10:04     Subject: Re:How many people are actually having affairs?
I have no idea as most of our friends have been married a long time with no divorces. But, I guess the odds are high that someone has and it better not be my husband as he gets plenty of sex at home with a BJ often added in for good measure.
Anonymous
Post 05/30/2020 09:58     Subject: Re:How many people are actually having affairs?
To me, the affair has to have an emotional component. Otherwise it is nothing more than assisted masturbation.


So if you have sex with someone other than your spouse but it’s just physical, you don’t think it’s cheating? I doubt your spouse would agree.
Anonymous
Post 05/30/2020 09:57     Subject: Re:How many people are actually having affairs?
Woman here. No cheating on my part and no woman in close circle of friends and family have cheated. I guess based n what I hear here, it's hard to say foe men in my close circle. It seems like mist don't ( I have suspicion about 2 though).
Anonymous
Post 05/30/2020 09:53     Subject: How many people are actually having affairs?
Anonymous wrote:Probably half the guys I work with (I work in finance). Everyone in the office knows about them. Most of them travel a lot (not now obviously) so there is a lot of opportunity. They also have a lot of dinners and events so late night opportunities. It amazes me that their wives don’t know but perhaps they put up with it because their husbands earn a lot of money.

The strangest ones are the affairs that have been going on for over 10 years and the wife still doesn’t seem to care. One guy spends a lot of time at his second home with the lawyer girlfriend. Not sure what the wife does when he is with the girlfriend.

My job has left me very suspicious of high income earning men with SAHM wives. It also surprises me how vicious some people get against women having affairs when it seems so prevalent


Just curious: what have you seen for those men with working spouse? Any difference in cheating rates? Also, when you say you work in finance, does this mean finance people in large Corp. or something else?
Anonymous
Post 05/30/2020 09:49     Subject: How many people are actually having affairs?
Anonymous wrote:For me, it depends on how you define affairs. If you define it as emotional relationship with a physical component...nope. I did have a 99% cyber emotional affair with ex-GF. (We did cybersex but the one time we met in person it was not happening. Her MAGA hat took away all desires).

And if you are talking about 100% physical with no emotions, I plead the fifth.

To me, the affair has to have an emotional component. Otherwise it is nothing more than assisted masturbation.


Of course any physical has to count as an affair. So yes for y o u. Question is what % if other men?
Anonymous
Post 05/30/2020 07:22     Subject: How many people are actually having affairs?
For me, it depends on how you define affairs. If you define it as emotional relationship with a physical component...nope. I did have a 99% cyber emotional affair with ex-GF. (We did cybersex but the one time we met in person it was not happening. Her MAGA hat took away all desires).

And if you are talking about 100% physical with no emotions, I plead the fifth.

To me, the affair has to have an emotional component. Otherwise it is nothing more than assisted masturbation.
Anonymous
Post 05/30/2020 07:11     Subject: How many people are actually having affairs?
Anonymous wrote:Probably half the guys I work with (I work in finance). Everyone in the office knows about them. Most of them travel a lot (not now obviously) so there is a lot of opportunity. They also have a lot of dinners and events so late night opportunities. It amazes me that their wives don’t know but perhaps they put up with it because their husbands earn a lot of money.

The strangest ones are the affairs that have been going on for over 10 years and the wife still doesn’t seem to care. One guy spends a lot of time at his second home with the lawyer girlfriend. Not sure what the wife does when he is with the girlfriend.

My job has left me very suspicious of high income earning men with SAHM wives. It also surprises me how vicious some people get against women having affairs when it seems so prevalent


Their wives do not have to be SAHM. I have a high earning spouse and have a good career myself.

These guys cheat with the SAH wives while the husband is at work. Ashley Madison.

Anonymous
Post 05/30/2020 06:25     Subject: Re:How many people are actually having affairs?
Affairs for men is about 20-25% and long term (years) numbers are less.
Anonymous
Post 05/30/2020 04:47     Subject: Re:How many people are actually having affairs?
Anonymous wrote:Between 25-75% of people will cheat at some point.

Yes, that is an enormous range, so who knows. You can google this and finds lots of support its only 25% and lots of support its as high as 75%. Even if you take the middle number, it's about half of people cheat. At some point. Doesn't mean half of people are currently cheating, it could have been a one time thing in the past.

Echoing what someone said upthread, I work in an industry with lots of travel and work conferences and I would guess 75% infidelity rate for men is about right in my view. If men can, most will (not all, and yes, yes, of course not YOUR husband).


But not all of theses cheaters are having affairs. Often its a one-off or short term thing. The percentage of actual affairs is probably much closer to the 25% range but again, you can find support for whatever number suits your worldview.
Anonymous
Post 05/30/2020 04:45     Subject: Re:How many people are actually having affairs?
Between 25-75% of people will cheat at some point.

Yes, that is an enormous range, so who knows. You can google this and finds lots of support its only 25% and lots of support its as high as 75%. Even if you take the middle number, it's about half of people cheat. At some point. Doesn't mean half of people are currently cheating, it could have been a one time thing in the past.

Echoing what someone said upthread, I work in an industry with lots of travel and work conferences and I would guess 75% infidelity rate for men is about right in my view. If men can, most will (not all, and yes, yes, of course not YOUR husband).