I am the opposite of a morning person, so my only alone time is after the kids are in bed. My sole mission every day is wearing them out So they go to bed by 7 PM. If this didn’t happen I would get no time to work out, decompress, take care of myself. In my opinion kids go to bed way too late in general, and I’m sure most people are using quarantine as reasons for their kids to stay up even later. It always leads to disaster. Kids need 10-12 hours of sleep, and the best quality sleep is earlier in the night. Do yourself a favor and try it for a week and you’ll find you get a lot more time to yourself in the evening that is kid free, whether you use it to get more work in or you use it to relax it’s up to you.

I'm a single mom with a 7 year old. What is "me" time?

^^^ I should note, I am a morning person, although I'm not springing out of bed then, I have to set an alarm and drag myself to the bathroom. If you're a night owl, consider setting a time to stop work so you can get an hour or so before bed. I understand the need to feel like you work until you crash, but just set a time that you'll be done and turn it off then.

Anonymous wrote:Curious how others are finding time for themselves these days because I can’t seem to make it work and am seriously burnt out. DH and I are both working from home while homeschooling a 7 year old and trying to keep our 2.5 year old alive. Younger one is up by 6:30 latest and I am on duty from then until 12pm during the week. After lunch DH and I switch and I work from about 1-5pm before prepping dinner and then spending a little time with the kids before bedtime at 7pm for the younger one and 8pm for the older one. From 8pm until midnight or sometimes later DH and I log back on to finish work. Unfortunately we both have a lot going on with work right now so while our companies are flexible about when we are working, we still have a lot to get done.

Weekends are better but we do each spend 2-3 hours catching up on work as needed, and it’s really the only time we have to clean up and do laundry. The kids are generally glued to me so sometimes DH will sneak off to go for a 20 min jog but I can’t seem to find even half that amount of time.

How do others do it? Need to figure something out that does not involve me waking up earlier because I can’t function on any less sleep than I am already getting.

I get up at 5 or 5:30 in order to have an hour to walk or work out by myself.

It sounds like you are getting a ton of family time in, and I am not really sure that’s necessary right now.

1) Each of you work either Saturday or Sunday, then take a different day off during the week. On the day you aren’t working, you take a few hours of “me” time when your spouse is on with the kids.

2) Once a week, don’t have dinner with the family. Finish up your work at 5pm, then just go somewhere else and come back at bedtime.

3) Do housework while you are homeschooling and watching your 2.5 year old. The great thing about housework is that you can stop doing it at any moment and just pick it up again later.

I try to run or walk most days and I stay up too late after the kids go to bed for me time.

We ordered a peloton and the fact that it’s my 30 min of me time a day is a real motivator to actually use it. Haha.

We have a 5 and 3 year old and a similar schedule to the OP. It’s not easy and my colleagues are all childless and have taken to complaining about being bored on the weekends. With the nice weather coming, hoping to start doing super early coffee outside with a book. Breathe deep when you can. It’s not hard because you’re doing it wrong - it’s hard because it’s hard.

Your dh gets a 20 minute jog in, you need to get a 20 minute break. YES you can fit it in if he can. Sit down and schedule it. Go for a walk. Sit in the car. There’s no reason he should get 20 minutes and you shouldn’t. It’ll be good for the 7 year old for you to get away, he needs to be okay wth you being gone for a short time. Doing it at the same time each day will help him understand.

I have an hour to myself when my kid is in bed, that’s it. I work 12 hour shifts out of the home and spouse works 4pm- midnight during the week, also out of the home. Can’t help you with alone time, but if you want time to jog or walk take the kids with you. 7yocan tide s bike and 2yo in a jogging stroller. Do it in the morning while you’re on kid duty.

Anonymous wrote:I mix errands and alone time by going to the far away grocery store

For the win! NICE.

Anonymous wrote:I have a ton of down time, but I am in a unique position. I am an essential worker who works every other week and cannot work at home at all.

I am on paid leave when I’m not in the office. DH works from home in a private sector job.

We have a 3 year old, but she naps every afternoon, so I have a large chunk of the day when I can clean, do laundry, or just relax.

It’s one of the many reasons I love my job.

Do you always spend your Saturday nights searching the Internet for opportunities to be a jerk to someone who’s struggling? How do you think your post is useful for the OP?

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I have a ton of down time, but I am in a unique position. I am an essential worker who works every other week and cannot work at home at all.

I am on paid leave when I’m not in the office. DH works from home in a private sector job.

We have a 3 year old, but she naps every afternoon, so I have a large chunk of the day when I can clean, do laundry, or just relax.

It’s one of the many reasons I love my job.

Thanks for coming out.

?

If you don’t get that, it’s time to crank up your snarky meter, sister!

lol to that poster.

We switch work & parenting on weekdays.

Our schedule for work is:
DH:6-8 am
Me: 8 am-12 pm
DH: 12 pm-5 pm
Me: 7 pm - 9 pm

I’m taking leave every week, DH can’t, unfortunately.

So, very little me time. Maybe 2 hours a day.

One hour in the evening after I’m done with work and DS already in bed. This is usually like 9-10 p.m. If all goes well, an hour in the morning before DS is up and I start work.

Weekends are a little better, we do family stuff but also switch off running an errand or taking DS for walks, etc., so we each get some alone time.

OP. we are on a similar schedule. DH and I trade off child care during the day. Kid is 1.5, so it is impossible to work while with her. I try to squeeze in 4-5 hours of work during the day and another 4-5 after she goes to sleep, usually turning in around midnight and then she's up between 6/6:30 and it starts again. A couple of things that have helped:

- We try to switch off who does wake up and let the other one sleep in a little, so a couple of times a week I get an extra hour or so of sleep in the morning.

-I take at least 20 minutes to exercise during the night block of work, usually about halfway through. It helps give me a little more energy.

- I don't know if this is doable with homeschooling, but it has helped me tremendously to start involving my kid in things that interest me. So, while it's my time with her we'll sometimes bake together or do 20 minutes of yoga or some other thing I actually enjoy that is not just sitting on the floor playing with her toys. Or, though not exactly "me" time, she'll help me with stuff around the house like handing me clothes while I fold laundry. It saves a little time to be able to do those things with her. That said, she's really into "helping" right now and I recognize we're kind of in the sweet spot for that, so I don't know if that's doable with your age ranges.

- We also do a few hours of work on the weekend, but I can usually keep it limited to ~2 hours after she goes to bed. It has helped to still switch off childcare during the weekend even though we are not working during the day. We still get some time with all of us together, but try to also block off 1-2 hours a day where we can each just go in the bedroom and watch a tv show or read a book or something.

Honestly though, it sucks, and this is the first week it started to really feel like burn out for me.

I’m divorced with primary custody. The every other weekend break is lifesaving with three kids 10-13 and a high pressure wah job.