Anonymous
Post 05/12/2020 09:44     Subject: Did your kid not apply for to a college because of visit? Excellent School
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:My DD is interested in going into a very specific major. Researching schools in advance, we both thought one particular school would be “perfect” for her. Our experience with the school including the virtual visit was so bad that she’s thinking of not applying. On paper the university sounds great and has great reviews.

I’m just trying to reconcile this in my head with I am reading with what we experienced. We tried to make an appointment to visit the University back in Jan (pre-COVID). We started off on the wrong foot because we wanted to meet with an academic advisor in the department my DD will be majoring in. I called and got a very snippy receptionist who told us who to contact. DD contacted and didn’t hear back for a week. DD sent a follow up message requesting a meeting. Person setting up meeting with academic advisor made DD feel like she was impatient. FWIW- all the other schools she set up meetings with got back with her Within 24 to 48 hours. Due to COVID visit was understandably cancelled. They offered a virtual tour. It was horrible. The AV was poor, they had technical difficulties and we were unimpressed with the admission rep. We met with the academic advisor later and she cut of off and was downright rude. My daughter was in tears after the virtual visit.

I’m sure if I posted the name of the school people here would say that’s an amazing school For the major- yet our experience was anything but. The school went from being a top choice for DD to I don’t think I should apply.

I am just wondering if others had similar experiences with colleges letting them down pre-admissions but applied anyway and went. My thought is if they can’t treat DD well when she’s a prospective student, why should I think they will treat her any differently if she were to be accepted?



Most faculty are focusing on enrolled student. During my time as a Tenure Track Professor (No tenure for me), I had prospective undergrads contact me to come in. They would want to spend 1 hour or so with me. 1 or 2 a month were not an issue. But when kids are applying to 10+ colleges, and it becomes 10 per month, that becomes a significant time sink. The time came out of my research time or my personal time/sleep time. And usually the questions or what they wanted to know were things that were in the catalog. (Like how many classes of X do I need to take; Um, I would have to look it up...what if I want to take x instead of y...dean would have to approve it. Or my favorite...I am a christian, and do not believe in evolution. Do I have to take historical geology? Yes. Then parents complained to the dean. Dean responds why are you doing this? Why are you talking to prospective freshmen?). This was at a Tier 1 research school.


I think this end of this story is informative for people who claim Tier 1 research schools are great places to learn science. THe pressures on faculty are NOT to give more attention to undergrads, believe me. I prefer a SLAC any day of the week.
Anonymous
Post 05/12/2020 09:44     Subject: Did your kid not apply for to a college because of visit? Excellent School
OP again. Thank you for your thoughtful responses. I guess the thing that bothers me the MOST about the "perfect school" is that we've done virtual visits with other schools and NONE have treated us poorly except this particular one. The other one was larger and in the same state and treated us SO well and they were dealing with the exact same issues. We actually did back to back virtual visits (2 days in a row). The second school did a stellar job.

Isn't there a famous saying, "When people show you who they are believe them." I realize she didn't interact with the staff though and it was just the administration.

Do higher ranked schools "treat" prospective students worse? Is that a thing?

Another part to this is the whole experience is it feels like a flashback when I registered my DD for what I thought was the right private grade school. The administration was similarly snippy and my DD suffered many years before we realized it and made a change.
Anonymous
Post 05/12/2020 09:42     Subject: Re:Did your kid not apply for to a college because of visit? Excellent School
Flip side can also happen. Maybe the stars align one day and you visit a place on a beautiful day, with a fantastic tour guide, every student seem happy, and you have a great experience.

Reality will never be like that. It's freezing and snowy much of the time and the work load is a beast.

Just do your homework as best you can. A visit is important but is just one slice of the pie.
Anonymous
Post 05/12/2020 09:30     Subject: Did your kid not apply for to a college because of visit? Excellent School
Anonymous wrote:Had very unpleasant tour at a top ivy. The representative giving the introduction was snobby and off putting and "what can you do for us instead of what can we do for you".....central casting could not have done better. Student guide was fine.

Actually went back a second time because it is a top school and I did not want a poor quality tour to cross it off list unnecessarily. 2nd visit was better .

I think you have to look at the visits as just one piece of the puzzle. Can have a bad experience not really indicative of the school.


This makes sense. One stressed out college student tour guide shouldn't be more important in your research than all other resources.
Anonymous
Post 05/12/2020 09:28     Subject: Did your kid not apply for to a college because of visit? Excellent School
I didn’t think prospective students asking for meetings with faculty was a thing anywhere but small colleges. My senior never asked or expected that.
Anonymous
Post 05/12/2020 09:23     Subject: Did your kid not apply for to a college because of visit? Excellent School
Had very unpleasant tour at a top ivy. The representative giving the introduction was snobby and off putting and "what can you do for us instead of what can we do for you".....central casting could not have done better. Student guide was fine.

Actually went back a second time because it is a top school and I did not want a poor quality tour to cross it off list unnecessarily. 2nd visit was better .

I think you have to look at the visits as just one piece of the puzzle. Can have a bad experience not really indicative of the school.
Anonymous
Post 05/12/2020 08:45     Subject: Did your kid not apply for to a college because of visit? Excellent School
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:OP again. The weird thing is at the moment that my DD LOVES her safety though that seems so cliché. While the safety has an okay academic reputation, the honors program which she will probably qualify for seems amazing. When we visited, we went on a special tour for kids applying to honors. We both felt like it was a place that she’s really fit in.


Sounds like the safety is for her. She needs to be where she’s happiest.


+1. If it's financially within your means, you've hit a home run.


+2 She can always keep "fancy university" in mind for grad school.
Anonymous
Post 05/12/2020 08:30     Subject: Did your kid not apply for to a college because of visit? Excellent School
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:OP again. The weird thing is at the moment that my DD LOVES her safety though that seems so cliché. While the safety has an okay academic reputation, the honors program which she will probably qualify for seems amazing. When we visited, we went on a special tour for kids applying to honors. We both felt like it was a place that she’s really fit in.


Sounds like the safety is for her. She needs to be where she’s happiest.


+1. If it's financially within your means, you've hit a home run.
Anonymous
Post 05/12/2020 08:29     Subject: Did your kid not apply for to a college because of visit? Excellent School
If you still think the school looks good on paper, dive a little deeper. The school might be open in the fall when you can get a real tour vs a virtual. Next, can your high school guidance counselor be of help? Maybe she knows a current student who your DD could talk to.
Anonymous
Post 05/12/2020 08:25     Subject: Did your kid not apply for to a college because of visit? Excellent School
I opted against a university because the town was a war zone. Didn’t realise it until I was on campus and got a vibe from students about go and no go areas next to campus.
Anonymous
Post 05/12/2020 08:02     Subject: Re:Did your kid not apply for to a college because of visit? Excellent School
"going into a very specific major."

Part of your problem may start here. Many of the most specific majors have very few undergrads and so have spent very little time preparing anything for undergrads because most years not a single one wants to visit.

Anonymous
Post 05/12/2020 07:54     Subject: Did your kid not apply for to a college because of visit? Excellent School
Also some universities keep productivity statistics and admissions folks can be rewarded based on number of 'leads' they generate at the college fair, number of apps they generate etc. They are not motivated to give you good advice, but to hit their targets, kinda like the insurance salesman who ALWAYS thinks you need more insurance
Anonymous
Post 05/12/2020 07:51     Subject: Did your kid not apply for to a college because of visit? Excellent School
Our university academic advisors often give students info that seems questionable, including exaggerating facts about availability of classes and career prospects associated with various degrees. Even if you have a great interview with admissions folks the onus is on you to do your due diligence. Trust but verify. Our advisors also really exaggerate things like faculty availability to undergrads etc.
Anonymous
Post 05/12/2020 07:41     Subject: Did your kid not apply for to a college because of visit? Excellent School
I think a visit can have a large affect on a kids impression either good or bad that has nothing to really do with the school itself. DS and I reminded ourselves of this after leaving an open house when a fire alarm forced us to evacuate the engineering building during a tour in to the rain for 25 minutes. Our lunch choice took a long time which was not the schools fault but made the rest of our day stressful.

It is like going to a restaurant on a bad night. You never go back but the restaurant might be a favorite had you gone on a different night.
Anonymous
Post 05/12/2020 07:40     Subject: Did your kid not apply for to a college because of visit? Excellent School
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:My DD is interested in going into a very specific major. Researching schools in advance, we both thought one particular school would be “perfect” for her. Our experience with the school including the virtual visit was so bad that she’s thinking of not applying. On paper the university sounds great and has great reviews.

I’m just trying to reconcile this in my head with I am reading with what we experienced. We tried to make an appointment to visit the University back in Jan (pre-COVID). We started off on the wrong foot because we wanted to meet with an academic advisor in the department my DD will be majoring in. I called and got a very snippy receptionist who told us who to contact. DD contacted and didn’t hear back for a week. DD sent a follow up message requesting a meeting. Person setting up meeting with academic advisor made DD feel like she was impatient. FWIW- all the other schools she set up meetings with got back with her Within 24 to 48 hours. Due to COVID visit was understandably cancelled. They offered a virtual tour. It was horrible. The AV was poor, they had technical difficulties and we were unimpressed with the admission rep. We met with the academic advisor later and she cut of off and was downright rude. My daughter was in tears after the virtual visit.

I’m sure if I posted the name of the school people here would say that’s an amazing school For the major- yet our experience was anything but. The school went from being a top choice for DD to I don’t think I should apply.

I am just wondering if others had similar experiences with colleges letting them down pre-admissions but applied anyway and went. My thought is if they can’t treat DD well when she’s a prospective student, why should I think they will treat her any differently if she were to be accepted?



As a tenured faculty member, I can tell you that universities are big places with lots of employees. I've barely even known the admin people who do work for ME, let alone those who do work for students. I couldn't name a single person in the academic advising office. Admissions rep? This is probably somebody who otherwise would be an insurance salesman. There can be a huge disconnect between the quality of classes and extracurricular activities that make up a "program" or "major" than two nobody administrators. Public or Private, universities are large bureaucracies. COVID aside (which might explain part of this), there are some wonderful people and there are people who should not be employed in any job. This was true even at an ivy league university I worked at. The campus experience is defined by interactions with 100 different people before your child graduates. I would be mortified to know that I put all this effort into designing courses that are excellently reviewed only to have it ruined by some incompetent advisor or admissions rep. I would just look at reviews or talk to students who went through the programs before you make any decision. That would be wayyyyyy more reliable than your brief experience with a very small sample (almost doesn't deserve to be called a sample) of low level grunt employees. Finally, don't forget that most "academic advisors" job is literally to look down a pre-printed list of courses that satisfy requirements and tell your student, "Durrrrr you can take A, B, or C." You might as well make a university decision based on how helpful the barista was at the campus starbucks.


Holy crap you come off as a huge jerk in this post, can you hear yourself?


I really resent the administrative bloat at universities. If thinking that about 25% of these people should be fired makes me a jerk, then so be it.


My academic advisor was the only person at my college who ever seemed to care about me as a human. Without the “administrative bloat” of “grunt” receptionists and staffers to guide me through the maze of higher ed, I never would have finished. And your class was just a stupid waste of time box I had to check to get to the end.


Congrats