I went for six years without six until we became empty nesters and divorced. She was pretty surprised because we never fought, though we discussed it ad nauseam, and I treated her very well as she is the mother of my children and she is a very good mother. When I finally said I was done because of it she was very upset that I would leave her but she showed no interest in changing. I didn’t date until after our divorce was final and I was very happy to meet women with very active libidos. My kids say my ex has no interest in dating which makes sense if she has no interest in sex so I guess it just wasn’t about me.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I try to do more chores.

This definitely does help.

IMO, there are about a handful of reasons why your wife doesn't want sex with you:

1. she resents you
2. she's tired
3. you are no longer attractive (could be related to #1)
4. medical reasons (drop in hormones or other illnesses)

These are good reasons. Here are some more:

1. Do you pay attention to her pleasure? Sex gets boring when you get nothing out of it.
2. To want sex, you have to feel sexy. To feel sexy, you need to feel confident and attractive. If you constantly belittle her or criticize her, she won't feel up for anything.

Anonymous wrote:I try to do more chores.

This definitely does help.

IMO, there are about a handful of reasons why your wife doesn't want sex with you:

1. she resents you
2. she's tired
3. you are no longer attractive (could be related to #1)
4. medical reasons (drop in hormones or other illnesses)

Anonymous wrote:Do not accept a sexless marriage. If she's not interested, declare the marriage open. Problem solved in 15 seconds.

+1 Do be prepared that a divorce could happen but that’s really for the best.

I’m in my mid 60’s and this is a group I’d hate to join and you have my sympathy. I’d prefer greater frequency which is now once a week but I’d be an idiot to complain. It also helps that my wife who is my age is very enthusiastic in bed.

Anonymous wrote:No one cares about your boners.

Honey, what are you doing in here?

Not a guy either but I was in a sexless marriage for about ten years:

Non-physical but intimate relationships
Self love
Waited until kids graduated HS
Divorce
Lots of great sex

Not a guy, but: I have spent $200 on fancy sex toys. It helps a lot. It doesn’t solve the longing to be desired and touched but great orgasms definitely improve my mindframe and physical relaxation.

Anonymous wrote:Just get a divorce. The sooner the better. You might not be as jaded when you start dating again.

+1

Just get a divorce. The sooner the better. You might not be as jaded when you start dating again.

I know a guy who said he messed around with his guy friends to blow off steam. Anyone else?

I try to do more chores.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Do not accept a sexless marriage. If she's not interested, declare the marriage open. Problem solved in 15 seconds.

And you're here. Didn't take long.

Yep, if this guy invested as much time in his marriage as he did here trying to validate his cheating, he might solve his own problem.

No one cares about your boners.

Anonymous wrote:Mine refuses to go on getaways by ourselves

Well the world is crazy now, there is that.

But when things get closer to normal, I bet she would love to have a meal at a nice restaurant, followed by drinks and an overnight at one of the nicer hotels downtown.

When my kids were little I didn't want to get too far away from them, either. I think I would have done an overnight at a nearby hotel though.