We have had Au Pairs for almost 9 years. It was a godsend when I used to travel and spouse had erratic work hours. Costs:
- ~$9K matching fee (can pay up front or in installments)
- $500 educational stipend
- $196 weekly stipend, although we pay $215 for “gas money”
- ~$75 extra weekly in groceries - we used to send some Au pairs shopping but they overslept so now I ask our Au pair to add to our weekly shopping list. Helps keep costs in check. You need to provide basics (milk, bread, eggs, meat, in-season fruits and vegetables), but you do not need to buy them their special flavor of high-end sparkling water or almond milk (they can buy that with their stipend)
- $150 - Christmas gifts
- $75 - birthday gifts
- $25 weekly if we take her out to dinner (doesn’t happen weekly)
- Extra car insurance - not sure how much this is
- Car or transportation if you want them to take your kid to activities. If you are more urban, may not need this.
- TBD - if you take them on vacation. I have found that they usually are excited if you tell them they get extra vacation time. If we are traveling over Thanksgiving or Christmas, we take them. Other trips depend on if it is convenient and if the Au Pair has really bonded with us.
- All In - ~$28K annually

Seems like a lot but for us, it has been amazing because once our two kids hit school age, we no longer had to load them up on expensive camps and they could relax and do fun activities like go to parks or our local pool or just rude bikes. If you assume 8 weeks of full-day camps, it can really add up. We also love having built-in babysitter. And extra hands if you want to run out to the grocery store, etc.

Anonymous wrote:You know that au pair is way cheaper than a nanny. Way to exploit a vulnerable young woman from a foreign country who is looking for a ‘cultural experience’ but winds up spending the majority of her time raising your child for less than a living wage. I couldn’t do it...

We had one for two years and she still visits us when she visits the states years later. I don’t know if many experiences like you describe among her peers

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Do you have a separate bedroom for the au pair? That’s a limiting factor for a lot of people.

Not exactly. We have a basement space that's nicely fixed up but probably wouldn't count as a real room. There is access from the upstairs and a door to the back patio.

Can you tell us more about this?

Is there a door that can close it off from the upstairs? Is there a bathroom down there? From what I gather from your descriptions, it doesn't sound like it would be too hard to make it a "legal" bedroom?

OP said her basement has a door to the patio. It sounds like a legal basement.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Do you have a separate bedroom for the au pair? That’s a limiting factor for a lot of people.

Not exactly. We have a basement space that's nicely fixed up but probably wouldn't count as a real room. There is access from the upstairs and a door to the back patio.

I doubt this would pass the local fire code as there must be a window in which s firefighter in full regalia must be able to get through. Also, some jurisdictions do not allow non family to live in basement.

The firefighter would be able to go through the door.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Do you have a separate bedroom for the au pair? That’s a limiting factor for a lot of people.

Not exactly. We have a basement space that's nicely fixed up but probably wouldn't count as a real room. There is access from the upstairs and a door to the back patio.

When your LCC (or whatever the local agency person is called in other agencies) checks your home, you have to show a legal bedroom. That means two exits, one of which has to be a lockable door, but the other can be a window or door.

Really? So if the Au Pair gets an entire basement, finished, but the egress is upstairs that won't pass muster? Seems odd because legally a member of the household is allowed to live in the basement even if there isn't egress.

Well, maybe you don't care about the family member you put on basement but the local fire code does care.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Do you have a separate bedroom for the au pair? That’s a limiting factor for a lot of people.

Not exactly. We have a basement space that's nicely fixed up but probably wouldn't count as a real room. There is access from the upstairs and a door to the back patio.

I doubt this would pass the local fire code as there must be a window in which s firefighter in full regalia must be able to get through. Also, some jurisdictions do not allow non family to live in basement.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:You know that au pair is way cheaper than a nanny. Way to exploit a vulnerable young woman from a foreign country who is looking for a ‘cultural experience’ but winds up spending the majority of her time raising your child for less than a living wage. I couldn’t do it...

Then don't. But stay away from giving advice where you have none, since you clearly have no real expereince with it. It shows.

My sil has one and I see her regularly so I’m not that clueless.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Do you have a separate bedroom for the au pair? That’s a limiting factor for a lot of people.

Not exactly. We have a basement space that's nicely fixed up but probably wouldn't count as a real room. There is access from the upstairs and a door to the back patio.

When your LCC (or whatever the local agency person is called in other agencies) checks your home, you have to show a legal bedroom. That means two exits, one of which has to be a lockable door, but the other can be a window or door.

Really? So if the Au Pair gets an entire basement, finished, but the egress is upstairs that won't pass muster? Seems odd because legally a member of the household is allowed to live in the basement even if there isn't egress.

Anonymous wrote:You know that au pair is way cheaper than a nanny. Way to exploit a vulnerable young woman from a foreign country who is looking for a ‘cultural experience’ but winds up spending the majority of her time raising your child for less than a living wage. I couldn’t do it...

Then don't. But stay away from giving advice where you have none, since you clearly have no real expereince with it. It shows.

You know that au pair is way cheaper than a nanny. Way to exploit a vulnerable young woman from a foreign country who is looking for a ‘cultural experience’ but winds up spending the majority of her time raising your child for less than a living wage. I couldn’t do it...

It's a lot more than you think, like a PP mentioned. It's been a few years since we had an au pair, but we took ours on vacation, gave her an extra car (a Volvo S80 that was 2 yrs old), an in law suite to live in...that was for starters. Then her friends were often at our house, so more food. She was young, so ate a like a young woman with no calorie restrictions. My kids are roughly her age now, and they eat like wolves too...but at the time I had forgotten how much that can be. If you're on a budget, it won't work for you. We had two, then switched to a FT nanny which actually ended up being less costly when all was said and done. Largely because it is also less emotionally exhausting, IMO. Many au pairs (not all, of course) have never been away from home, and are young. you become de facto mother and boss, which you may not be quite prepared for since you have young kids.

And there is a lot of "my host family X,Y, Z" type of comparisons. Some host families are great and others are awful. Our au pair had a friend whose family was really not nice to hair and totally mislead her about where and how they lived--she came from a major European city thinking she'd be close to DC and she was in La Plata with no transporation. She spent every weekend with us--so suddenly we had 2. It's can be hard.

It's also much easier to start off with strict rules and expectations and then loosen up when they get here and you get to know each other. It really varies.

To answer OP’s actual question:

Id plan on about $20k/year fully loaded with all the expenses many of the PPs have described.

If you can swing it I think it would be an amazing option for you!!

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Make sure you factor in the costs of car insurance, cell phone, food, etc. in addition to the $350-$400/week cost to have the au pair.

Is that the average for DC area? Thank you. That's another question I meant to ask. What would you say is the annual cost with all costs added up?

No. It’s 195.75 per week.

That’s just the stipend. There are also mandatory costs ($7-11k agency fee, $500/semester for college classes, coverage for 2 weeks of vacation), costs that most families have (car insurance, gas/parking/tolls, birthday present, Christmas gift, accompanying to dinner and events out, etc.), and costs that some families cover (vacation with family, friends or relatives staying over, etc.).

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Do you have a separate bedroom for the au pair? That’s a limiting factor for a lot of people.

Not exactly. We have a basement space that's nicely fixed up but probably wouldn't count as a real room. There is access from the upstairs and a door to the back patio.

When your LCC (or whatever the local agency person is called in other agencies) checks your home, you have to show a legal bedroom. That means two exits, one of which has to be a lockable door, but the other can be a window or door.