OP here with quick update. Second person at the facility has just told us that state regulations prevent the mats from being used as they are a hazard. I would understand that if they were left out all day but the idea is that they are out only after mom is in bed and folded and placed underneath the bed as soon as she is out of bed in the morning. We haven't cancelled the order yet and are still making sure they can't be used. BIL is a firefighter and has seen them in place in Virginia facilities so it may very from county to county or facility to facility but we are confused by the "state regulations" comment. Hard to get some things answered on a Sunday.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:95 year old mother was hospitalized again after a fall. The highly rated assisted living facility she is at checks on her every 2 hours at night. They claimed to have checked on her at 2am and she was asleep but they found her on the floor at 3am. There are restraint laws in Virginia that prevent her from being belted into the bed. The staff seems helpful but not overly concerned. Anyone have experience with using fall mats next to the bed to prevent injury? We are starting the process of looking for a night aid to hire to ensure that she does not get out of bed on her own but that may take a week or more to get into place. Any ideas appreciated.

Assisted living is just that. Assisted. It's not 24 care. Yes, you will need to hire someone to warch her. This is a frequent gap issue in the care system, with assisted living encompassing too broad of a spectrum of needs.

this. It's not safe for her to be alone anymore.

The residents of AL often have those Life Alert type necklaces. If they fall between caregiver checks or overnight they can push the button and paramedics will be summoned. If they get lost on an outing, they can press that button and help will be summoned.

Once they've pressed the button "X" amount of times they are usually recommended to a higher level of care - memory care, nursing home..

Can you take a minute to explain how hospice works, Op? What about your mom's situation qualifies for hospice?

We've got parents well into their 80's now and at some point this might be a concern for us.

Like you, I've always considered hospice to be end of life palliative care. I wasn't aware that hospice would do lift assists and help elderly/infirm people to the bathroom, etc.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:95 year old mother was hospitalized again after a fall. The highly rated assisted living facility she is at checks on her every 2 hours at night. They claimed to have checked on her at 2am and she was asleep but they found her on the floor at 3am. There are restraint laws in Virginia that prevent her from being belted into the bed. The staff seems helpful but not overly concerned. Anyone have experience with using fall mats next to the bed to prevent injury? We are starting the process of looking for a night aid to hire to ensure that she does not get out of bed on her own but that may take a week or more to get into place. Any ideas appreciated.

Assisted living is just that. Assisted. It's not 24 care. Yes, you will need to hire someone to warch her. This is a frequent gap issue in the care system, with assisted living encompassing too broad of a spectrum of needs.

this. It's not safe for her to be alone anymore.

Anonymous wrote:OP here. We are bringing in hospice care per the recommendation of her GP. It is not considered end of life care (a learning point for us--I had misunderstood this about hospice) but will mean she has someone with her 24/7. Until that is in place we are putting a mattress on the floor and will take turns staying with her. The mats are ordered. They were suggested as a good idea even after the hospice aid is in place. Thank you all for your input.

Great job, op! Your mom raised a wonderful child.

Anonymous wrote:She is 95. Take her home and let her go around family

This is what I would seriously consider. Overnight nurse or share a bedroom and figure out day care. Even if she lives a few more years at least I would be 100% involved in her care.

Anonymous wrote:OP here. We are bringing in hospice care per the recommendation of her GP. It is not considered end of life care (a learning point for us--I had misunderstood this about hospice) but will mean she has someone with her 24/7. Until that is in place we are putting a mattress on the floor and will take turns staying with her. The mats are ordered. They were suggested as a good idea even after the hospice aid is in place. Thank you all for your input.

It's great you have a plan in place. Good for you, Op!

OP here. We are bringing in hospice care per the recommendation of her GP. It is not considered end of life care (a learning point for us--I had misunderstood this about hospice) but will mean she has someone with her 24/7. Until that is in place we are putting a mattress on the floor and will take turns staying with her. The mats are ordered. They were suggested as a good idea even after the hospice aid is in place. Thank you all for your input.

Anonymous wrote:She is 95. Take her home and let her go around family

That is one option. Just be aware that she could live for another 3 years or more. Are you prepared to place a revolving door on your home for other family members to visit? Are you prepared to always have someone at home to watch Mom whenever you have to run to the store? Are you prepared to not go on vacation or even spend a night away w/o having to find a willing family member to step in and give you a break? People have a way of coming up with a million excuses why they can't help out. Don't assume that you would get any help with this. What happens if you, your child or your spouse gets sick and winds up in the hospital? Do you want to be in the position of trying to decide between staying at home and helping Mom OR going to the hospital to stay by your spouse/child?

Your best bet is either keeping her in AL and possibly hiring an overnight aid to stay with her. Or you move her to a nursing home. One of the two.

Has she had a recent check up? Look especially at her meds, because many cause balance problems.

Anonymous wrote:If you don’t think they are watching her can you put a camera in the room? Is that allowed?

Not likely.

She is 95. Take her home and let her go around family

Your parent is beyond assisted living. Yes, you can hire someone to monitor at night. That would be your best bet. Falls are common. my parent was falling all the time toward the end. You cannot blame the assisted living when your parent's needs are now at 24-7 level.

Anonymous wrote:Yeah, BTDT. You need to transition her to a higher level of care. Fwiw once she's in a skilled nursing or memory care facility, they tend to manage nighttime waking via meds. So it's not necessarily a better outcome from a quality of life point of view, but it's probably better than dying from a fall.

It's a double edged sword. If you are taking them away from their friends, social activities, entertainment and familiar routine in AL and placing them in a Memory Care unit or nursing home that is more about their physical care and keeping them safe....a severe transition like that could cause a decline as rapidly as a bad fall could.

If you don’t think they are watching her can you put a camera in the room? Is that allowed?