OP, our beloved Dane started to fail around the same age. The poop thing will likely eventually become a general weakness in the back end.

Start to come to terms with this being a decline, but also consider what you see the end looking like. We didn’t know “the day”, but one day, her whole back end gave out and there was no choice. For me, I’m glad to some degree it went as it did, because we had a wonderful day, and I didn’t have any option but to make an awful choice.

By breed standard, your wonderful companion has lived a good and strong life. It’s not going to get better, and if you choose to extend their life, you will have other choices, like making sure they never go up and down the stairs, etc.

There never a right time, or right answer. Our girl has been gone almost 2.5 years now, and my heart hurts still.

I’m so sorry, you’re going though this.

Dogs can be suffering s lot of pain and discomfort and yet be very stoic. They are still suffering. It’s time for this dog. I’m sorry. It’s so sad.

I think once an elderly blind dog starts to have accidents like this, it's time. I'm so sorry.

Your husband is going to suffer grief now or six months from now. Give him a deadline of December 26. Make the appointment.

I have heard that when a formerly house trained dog starts to have accidents like the ones Op is describing, it is upsetting to the dog. Dogs don't want to defecate in their own den which is what your home is to your dog.

If I don't notice that my dog is having a hard time standing up at first (maybe I'm in the shower, making the bed or doing a million other things) and she has been trying and failing to get it up without success...by the time I get to her she is shaking and scared. It breaks my heart. I help her up and she's o.k. again but it's gotten to the point where I worry about leaving her alone.

We are dealing with an old dog as well. She is 15 and has trouble on stairs, doesn't eat much and has lost a lot of weight (and we have to make special food), spends most of the time sleeping, and has pee pads for overnight. I think pooping in the house would be the last straw for me.

I wish she could just pass peacefully overnight but I think we are going to have to help her along soon. It sounds like it's time for you.

I'm an earlier pp (not Op) with the almost 13 year old dog who is having some similar issues. I got her a lift assist harness so that it's easier to help get her up when she's having a hard time standing - she's a solid 80 pound dog. Once she's up she seems to do o.k., a lot slower than normal, but o.k. She's still enjoying food, she still likes going outside and wandering around in the yard. Today was a really good day for her - she got treats, attention and she seemed to really enjoy it. But her bad days are a worry.

She does appear to be nearly blind. She's arthritic in her hind quarters and we can feel some fatty tumors in her abdomen.

Ugh, I so hate this. We've had her since she was a puppy.

My vet had a helpful philosophy: "It's better to be one day early, than one day too late."

Waiting too long only prolongs pain and may actually make it worse when you do decide to let him go. Veins may collapse, animal may be in severe distress, etc. Better to let him go now than wait till he is in agony.

The other thing to consider is the size of your dog. Can you and your DH lift, carry and transport him by car to the vet - especially if he is in distress? Unless you are lucky and your vet does euthanasia house calls (mine did - doing it at home while pet was in its own bed made it very peaceful and loving)

Some points for your DH to ponder...