Anonymous wrote:DH and I spent our 10th anniversary at an oceanfront hotel but it was the least romantic anniversary. He snored and plopped gas for two consecutive nights. I just couldn’t stand it. Early in the morning I tip toed to the door and went to the hotel’s deck to watch the sunrise and meditate. Please help me find a solution to these unhappy nights.
My guess is that it is not really the snoring and the farting that made it feel unromantic to you. My husband and I both wear mouth guards. We've both been known to fart. That stiff is going to happen whether it is our anniversary or not. It sounds to me like you had expectations of what a romantic 10th year anniversary getaway should look like and the one you had did not look like that. It did not meeet expectations. I've been there and realized that I was responsible for creating my own expectations. I realized that my expectations were mine. They were not necessarily his or anyone else's. If I expected people to meet them but didn't let them know what they were, I was setting them up for failure and myself up for disappointment. My husband and I have been together over 20 years (yikes!). When I am irritated with him it usually means that I feel unappreciated or my needs aren't being met. They are often simple needs. Little things that let me know I matter to him. It could be letting me sleep after I've been up with a sick kid. Running an errand that he'd rather not because it makes my life easier. Etc. I do the same for him. It sounds trite but marriage really is work. It would be great if our partners just knew exactly what we needed at all times but that only happens in romance novels and movies. Figure out what feels romantic to you and tell your husband.Ask him what he finds romantic. Communicate.
Also, I highly recommend earplugs.