NP. We moved to McLean and there are very few kids in our immediate neighborhood. Our 4 and 6yos get along fine. We go to the pool a lot during the summer, they are active in sports and have no shortage of excuses to play with friends and schoolmates. And yes we coordinate play dates from time to time. The idea that your kids will be robbed of something because they don't get to have unplanned AD HOC play is something many kids don't do - even when its an option. And like PP said, some kids and parents ARE just a bit different/weird - PP isn't terrible for acknowledging what we've all experienced in life.

We live in a neighborhood with 4 other girls in my DD’s fourth grade (same school). They are all 9-10yrs and dont play together anymore. One girl is a terrible bully — my daughter avoids. A second girl — my DD doesnt like her. 3rd girl — occassional playdates; mom is dating and always tries to use us for free childcare. 4th girl — occasional playdates; mom is raging alcoholic. You cant engineer this stuff sadly.

I grew up in a neighborhood with a swim team and active pool culture. We had tons of informal play dates. From what I hear, that neighborhood still functions in a similar way. The kids are now grown, and many are choosing to move back into the neighborhood, because it was such a wonderful neighborhood. Is there a pool- focused neighborhood in nearby McLean where your family could be happy?

Generally kids outgrow the neighborhood kids by 7th grade and then it doesn't matter, unless truly they were meant to be best friends.

How old are your kids? I think it’s really wonderful to have neighborhood friends for kids under the age of 10. After that, kids become so particular in who their friends are, they aren’t necessarily going to be friends with the neighbors. So, think about how many years this will be important for.

We are in a neighborhood with several kids my kids play with, and although we want to move to a different neighborhood/house, we will stay until my kids are maybe 12, 10, and 7 so they have more time to spontaneously play. After that age I think it won’t be a big deal to live someplace more isolated.

Mine doesn't have any neighborhood friends because she goes to a non-neighborhood school. There also weren't any similarly-aged girls on our block until this year. She goes to extended day and plays with kids there, and she knows girls through soccer, basketball and girl scouts, so she's not lonely.