Anonymous
Post 09/27/2019 09:29     Subject: Tell me your reasons for not allowing sleepovers
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:Your kids are more likely to get shot in a school shooting or get into a car accident driving with you, than something happen to them at a sleepover.

Fear mongering at it's finest.


I don't allow sleepovers. I was sexually abused when I was 5 by a "trusted adult", a nice, very born again Christian man, church leader. In my experience I've never been shot at, or in an accident, but I was abused. It's much more common than what you think.


Sorry this happened, but how what does this have anything to do with letting a 10 year old so sleep over a friend's house?

Do your kid's go to church, school, play sports, or have activities. Aren't there risks in all of those things too. The Church and schools especially.

Anonymous
Post 09/27/2019 09:22     Subject: Tell me your reasons for not allowing sleepovers
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:Your kids are more likely to get shot in a school shooting or get into a car accident driving with you, than something happen to them at a sleepover.

Fear mongering at it's finest.


I don't allow sleepovers. I was sexually abused when I was 5 by a "trusted adult", a nice, very born again Christian man, church leader. In my experience I've never been shot at, or in an accident, but I was abused. It's much more common than what you think.
... and it stings that some of you laugh it off as if it wasn't a real concern, but I'm not surprised. There are a lot of hypocrites on DCUM.


I don't think anyone was saying it can't happen. But if you avoid any situation where something could happen, you will never go anywhere or do anything. The chance of abuse happening at a sleepover is lower than many other types of "risks" we take without a second thought everyday. That you personally have never been in an accident doesn't change that.
Anonymous
Post 09/27/2019 09:11     Subject: Tell me your reasons for not allowing sleepovers
I generally don't allow them, but not for the reasons others listed. We pay a ton of money for DS to do two travel sports, which usually have weekend games. He can't be tired for them and we expect him to play his best. Sleepovers are not conducive to that. Also, I really don't want to host them. I have a very demanding job and long commute, and I don't want to lose a night of sleep. We allow and arrange for plenty of play dates so that DS gets to see friends.
Anonymous
Post 09/27/2019 09:11     Subject: Tell me your reasons for not allowing sleepovers
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:Your kids are more likely to get shot in a school shooting or get into a car accident driving with you, than something happen to them at a sleepover.

Fear mongering at it's finest.


I don't allow sleepovers. I was sexually abused when I was 5 by a "trusted adult", a nice, very born again Christian man, church leader. In my experience I've never been shot at, or in an accident, but I was abused. It's much more common than what you think.
... and it stings that some of you laugh it off as if it wasn't a real concern, but I'm not surprised. There are a lot of hypocrites on DCUM.
Anonymous
Post 09/27/2019 09:08     Subject: Tell me your reasons for not allowing sleepovers
Anonymous wrote:Your kids are more likely to get shot in a school shooting or get into a car accident driving with you, than something happen to them at a sleepover.

Fear mongering at it's finest.


I don't allow sleepovers. I was sexually abused when I was 5 by a "trusted adult", a nice, very born again Christian man, church leader. In my experience I've never been shot at, or in an accident, but I was abused. It's much more common than what you think.
Anonymous
Post 09/27/2019 09:08     Subject: Tell me your reasons for not allowing sleepovers
Anonymous wrote:As long as you know the family and the kid, I don't see why you wouldn't allow it. I'm less comfortable with large-group sleepovers than one-on-one, which I generally think are fine. I agree with the PP that said the sleep deprivation of the kid and cranky attitude the next day make sleepovers unappealing to me, but I don't disallow them except when we have other things going on that will be severely impacted by my kid being super tired. Also, I do limit how often.


A guy I dated in high school spent a year in prison in his thirties for charges relating to trying (and maybe succeeding?, I don’t know the specifics) to get a minor to have sex with him. I had spent more time one-on-one with him than I ever will with any of my children’s friends’ dads. I knew this guy’s family. They were a very wholesome, religious family and the guy was very respectful and even somewhat timid. I would never in a million years have suspected him of future creepy behavior.

One of my dd’s friends has no contact with her father because he’s in prison for being a purveyor of child pornography. Her mother married the guy and had children with him having no idea.

My kids will be able to attend sleepovers in 8th-9th grade if I feel like they’d know what to do and follow through if something turned inappropriate, but I think my kids would have been paralyzed with fear if someone had tried something with them in 2nd-4th grade. We talk about these things and I coach them on how to handle it, but I know my kids and I just think they would have froze up when they were younger. They are extremely reluctant to stand up to adults.
Anonymous
Post 09/27/2019 09:02     Subject: Tell me your reasons for not allowing sleepovers
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:Your kids are more likely to get shot in a school shooting or get into a car accident driving with you, than something happen to them at a sleepover.

Fear mongering at it's finest.


Thank you!

These anxiety ridden Mommies destroying their kid's lives one neurotic episode at a time.

They can't walk to the bus stop alone.
They can't cross a street.
Go to the park - alone? Never!
Sleepovers? A complete travesty waiting to happen.



No it's not. It's called crippling your kid to the point of not ever growing up.

It’s called parenting. Try it.
Anonymous
Post 09/27/2019 08:56     Subject: Tell me your reasons for not allowing sleepovers
Sometimes the abusers are the people you know. Could be best friends, neighbors, and teachers.
Anonymous
Post 09/27/2019 08:48     Subject: Tell me your reasons for not allowing sleepovers
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:Your kids are more likely to get shot in a school shooting or get into a car accident driving with you, than something happen to them at a sleepover.

Fear mongering at it's finest.


Thank you!

These anxiety ridden Mommies destroying their kid's lives one neurotic episode at a time.

They can't walk to the bus stop alone.
They can't cross a street.
Go to the park - alone? Never!
Sleepovers? A complete travesty waiting to happen.



It’s called parenting. Try it.


Oh, bless your heart. That is what you call parenting? I call that coddling and making sure your kid is sucking from the teet still at 10yrs old. Unable to do a single autonomous task in his life without his mommy or holding his mommy's hand. As his brain grows you continue to halt any natural progress by doing everything for them. Making them more and more fearful or being independent, having normal social interactions, and increasing his anxiety/stress 10 fold. Great parenting!!
Anonymous
Post 09/27/2019 08:41     Subject: Tell me your reasons for not allowing sleepovers
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:Your kids are more likely to get shot in a school shooting or get into a car accident driving with you, than something happen to them at a sleepover.

Fear mongering at it's finest.


Thank you!

These anxiety ridden Mommies destroying their kid's lives one neurotic episode at a time.

They can't walk to the bus stop alone.
They can't cross a street.
Go to the park - alone? Never!
Sleepovers? A complete travesty waiting to happen.



But but! My precious might get extra "screens" time


You made me spit my coffee out!!
Anonymous
Post 09/27/2019 08:40     Subject: Tell me your reasons for not allowing sleepovers
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:As long as you know the family and the kid, I don't see why you wouldn't allow it. I'm less comfortable with large-group sleepovers than one-on-one, which I generally think are fine. I agree with the PP that said the sleep deprivation of the kid and cranky attitude the next day make sleepovers unappealing to me, but I don't disallow them except when we have other things going on that will be severely impacted by my kid being super tired. Also, I do limit how often.


You never really know what goes on behind closed doors. Everyone worries about the men but women are equally abusive. I worked in child welfare for many years. Seen too much.


Once again, there are more chance for a child predators in school, than a friend's home. Are you homeschooling too?
Anonymous
Post 09/27/2019 05:52     Subject: Tell me your reasons for not allowing sleepovers
Anonymous wrote:My reason is the kids don't sleep. Can't deal with it the next day.


I say no to sleepovers often for this reason but phrase it as my DD won’t sleep and it affects her too much the next day. It’s the truth. She can hang out and I can pick her up late. We’ve done that. She has had sleepovers and I’m not worried if I know the family but she’s always so exhausted the next day. Even if the kids have a lights out time she doesn’t sleep well.
Anonymous
Post 09/27/2019 00:57     Subject: Tell me your reasons for not allowing sleepovers
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:Your kids are more likely to get shot in a school shooting or get into a car accident driving with you, than something happen to them at a sleepover.

Fear mongering at it's finest.


Thank you!

These anxiety ridden Mommies destroying their kid's lives one neurotic episode at a time.

They can't walk to the bus stop alone.
They can't cross a street.
Go to the park - alone? Never!
Sleepovers? A complete travesty waiting to happen.



But but! My precious might get extra "screens" time


LOL
Anonymous
Post 09/27/2019 00:42     Subject: Tell me your reasons for not allowing sleepovers
It's much safer to have a sleepover in today's world with cell phones than when I was a kid in the 70s. Parents can check in with their children easily. Children can discreetly text a parent to pick them up or if there is an issue. It's a fact that crimes against children have steadily dropped every decade.

Childhood slumber parties are fun. Don't be the weird parent that makes your child leave a party when the other girls start getting their pajamas on. IDK how some of you function on a daily basis with all you worry about.
Anonymous
Post 09/27/2019 00:30     Subject: Tell me your reasons for not allowing sleepovers
Anonymous wrote:As long as you know the family and the kid, I don't see why you wouldn't allow it. I'm less comfortable with large-group sleepovers than one-on-one, which I generally think are fine. I agree with the PP that said the sleep deprivation of the kid and cranky attitude the next day make sleepovers unappealing to me, but I don't disallow them except when we have other things going on that will be severely impacted by my kid being super tired. Also, I do limit how often.


You never really know what goes on behind closed doors. Everyone worries about the men but women are equally abusive. I worked in child welfare for many years. Seen too much.