Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Revenge is a dish best served cold. Wait until you find someone you lust after and keep it to yourself. Then you can smile all day long and he will be none the wiser.
OP here. I agree with this. I am playing the long game. He thinks I am interested in reconciling. We have our nice talks and talk about the future going forward. He is being super nice and caring. But I know it is all BS. He is a selfish entitled man child and no longer the person I fell in love with. He is scared to death to look bad in front of his kids, friends, and colleagues and losing a big chunk of money. It is going to be fun exposing him for the fraud that he is.
Here’s the thing. It can be fun and cathartic to think about “exposing” him to everyone, but I’d advise you to think long and hard about the actual implications of that. First of all none of his coworkers will care, unless he had an affair with someone he supervises, and even then - would you want to risk him losing his job and your kids’ financial security? Friends don’t want to know the details of your marriage and they might wind up judging YOU. You really open yourself up to criticism or the sad truth that no one really cares as much as you do. Telling your kids is a stupid idea for obvious reasons.
It just isn’t going to be the big blowup you imagine where you look like the good one.
Totally agree with this. One of my business partners ex wife sent a company wide email about his cheating and the universal consensus was she looked crazy and it created a bit of empathy for him
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Revenge is a dish best served cold. Wait until you find someone you lust after and keep it to yourself. Then you can smile all day long and he will be none the wiser.
OP here. I agree with this. I am playing the long game. He thinks I am interested in reconciling. We have our nice talks and talk about the future going forward. He is being super nice and caring. But I know it is all BS. He is a selfish entitled man child and no longer the person I fell in love with. He is scared to death to look bad in front of his kids, friends, and colleagues and losing a big chunk of money. It is going to be fun exposing him for the fraud that he is.
Here’s the thing. It can be fun and cathartic to think about “exposing” him to everyone, but I’d advise you to think long and hard about the actual implications of that. First of all none of his coworkers will care, unless he had an affair with someone he supervises, and even then - would you want to risk him losing his job and your kids’ financial security? Friends don’t want to know the details of your marriage and they might wind up judging YOU. You really open yourself up to criticism or the sad truth that no one really cares as much as you do. Telling your kids is a stupid idea for obvious reasons.
It just isn’t going to be the big blowup you imagine where you look like the good one.
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Revenge is a dish best served cold. Wait until you find someone you lust after and keep it to yourself. Then you can smile all day long and he will be none the wiser.
OP here. I agree with this. I am playing the long game. He thinks I am interested in reconciling. We have our nice talks and talk about the future going forward. He is being super nice and caring. But I know it is all BS. He is a selfish entitled man child and no longer the person I fell in love with. He is scared to death to look bad in front of his kids, friends, and colleagues and losing a big chunk of money. It is going to be fun exposing him for the fraud that he is.
Anonymous wrote:Recently discovered DH’s affair. I have the contact of the AP’s spouse. Considering offering myself to him. I know this is a bad idea but why should DH get to live in fantasyland.
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Revenge is a dish best served cold. Wait until you find someone you lust after and keep it to yourself. Then you can smile all day long and he will be none the wiser.
OP here. I agree with this. I am playing the long game. He thinks I am interested in reconciling. We have our nice talks and talk about the future going forward. He is being super nice and caring. But I know it is all BS. He is a selfish entitled man child and no longer the person I fell in love with. He is scared to death to look bad in front of his kids, friends, and colleagues and losing a big chunk of money. It is going to be fun exposing him for the fraud that he is.
Anonymous wrote:Revenge is a dish best served cold. Wait until you find someone you lust after and keep it to yourself. Then you can smile all day long and he will be none the wiser.
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Why would you want to have an affair with a stranger? Find somebody you like.
This. Have the revenge affair if you want but do it with someone you lust after, not some rando because you are hoping to hurt both your H andnthe OW.
Anonymous wrote:Why would you want to have an affair with a stranger? Find somebody you like.
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Bang his most slutty friend not OWs H... make it a 3-some.
kinda +1 definitely more appealing to do this outside of your/DH's home zone. be it a simple M-F affair or a 3-some (MFM), you get to play out whatever kink/fantasy you want an on your terms. maybe video tape/pics of the romp for you to keep and to use as an Ace card in the future. I don't know, maybe I'm just super vindictive.
Anonymous wrote:My wife had an affair. I didn't want to lose my marriage and access to kids so we are working on it. We have already discussed that if I felt the need to step out myself she would forgive me.
And I have. A couple times. She hasn't found out and I will keep going till she does. I kind of get the appeal of these now.
Anonymous wrote:Why would you want to have an affair with a stranger? Find somebody you like.
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:I have some neighbors who went through this kind of thing exactly as you describe. Both couples ended up divorcing and marrying the affair partners. Five years later, both (new) couples still going strong.
Happy ending?
My best friend from grad school did exactly this too. Although both new couples are remarried and together, it's anything but happy.