Anonymous
Post 08/27/2019 21:16     Subject: Taking comfort object away as punishment
Anonymous wrote:Quick help us dcum- our difficult DD 4 took off her pants and underwear at dinner (egged on by big brother) and ran around shaking her hurt at us and interrupting dinner. She was told to stop, didn’t, kept irritating family and working up younger brother, and punishment for that is losing her toys she likes (baby stroller and babies). While these toys were taken away she taunted parent and danced with no pants saying I don’t care I don’t care. Parent said ok fine and told her she lost her snuggly favorite blanket (one of three loves) for tonight. Dd has been full on melting down for this punishment for the past two hours and bedtime is rapidly approaching. One parent says this is cruel punishment and to give in. The other parent is standing firm. Tell us what to do!

**blanket will return tomorrow , it’s not being thrown out. She has been told this.


You tell brother to knock it off or he gets a timeout/sent to room and can finish dinner later. And, you warn her, then take the clothing, put them on her and put her in a time out. If she refuses a time you, she goes in her room and/or early bed. You stop eating and parent your kid.
Anonymous
Post 08/27/2019 21:06     Subject: Taking comfort object away as punishment
So she’s holding the whole family hostage over an incident from hours ago and you are still dragging it out? Deal with things on the spot when they happen. She’s 4 and that timeline is teaching her to make the entire evening about a dance that lasted two minutes at dinner. You lost this one. Give her back the lovey and do better next time.
Anonymous
Post 08/27/2019 21:02     Subject: Re:Taking comfort object away as punishment
Definitely too harsh. Please give it back and don’t keep it just to feel a sense that you “didn’t give in.” Not worth it in this instance and doesn’t mean you will lose control. Sometimes we make mistakes and have to say woops I thought this was a good punishment but I think this is enough.
Anonymous
Post 08/27/2019 21:01     Subject: Taking comfort object away as punishment
Anonymous wrote:OP this is hilarious! You were at home right? Not a restaurant?

This is small potatoes. Give her the object back, y’all about manners, make sure you praise her when she sits nicely at dinner tomorrow.


Girl you know we can’t handle these maniacs out at a restaurant after a long day! Yes we were home. This is not an unusual thing for my kids to do. They call it the butt show. It drives my DH crazy lol!
Anonymous
Post 08/27/2019 20:57     Subject: Taking comfort object away as punishment
OP this is hilarious! You were at home right? Not a restaurant?

This is small potatoes. Give her the object back, y’all about manners, make sure you praise her when she sits nicely at dinner tomorrow.
Anonymous
Post 08/27/2019 20:40     Subject: Taking comfort object away as punishment
Anonymous wrote:I wouldn't choose that route. I'd do time out and remove her from the situation. Her comfort object for sleep etc is her comfort object.


OP didn't want to stop eating.
Anonymous
Post 08/27/2019 20:33     Subject: Re:Taking comfort object away as punishment
My mom would have smacked me immediatly, and I never would have done that again. A 4 year old is old enough to know consequences and how to behave properly.
Anonymous
Post 08/27/2019 19:37     Subject: Taking comfort object away as punishment
Anonymous wrote:What punishment did her brother get for prompting her to undress at the table?



Excellent point. Nothing...yet
Anonymous
Post 08/27/2019 19:37     Subject: Taking comfort object away as punishment
Thanks all. Apology procured from 4 year old. blankie returned . Will keep up the good fight tmrw.
Anonymous
Post 08/27/2019 19:37     Subject: Taking comfort object away as punishment
What punishment did her brother get for prompting her to undress at the table?
Anonymous
Post 08/27/2019 19:34     Subject: Taking comfort object away as punishment
Punishment is you are done dinner and excused from the table. Child goes to her room or washroom until she is willing to redress. Once dressed she can rejoin. If she won't leave then you leave. Removing her audience kills the show.

If she has 3 comfort items, I would not feel as horrible about the removal of one. Not a punishment I would repeat though.
Anonymous
Post 08/27/2019 19:28     Subject: Taking comfort object away as punishment
I wouldn't choose that route. I'd do time out and remove her from the situation. Her comfort object for sleep etc is her comfort object.
Anonymous
Post 08/27/2019 19:26     Subject: Taking comfort object away as punishment
At her age this punishment is not immediate enough in addition to being cruel.
Anonymous
Post 08/27/2019 19:25     Subject: Taking comfort object away as punishment
Cruel and abusive
Anonymous
Post 08/27/2019 19:13     Subject: Taking comfort object away as punishment
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:Make her apologize one change for blanket.


This should say in exchange


Agree. Give her a way to earn it back. As a PP said it’s not related to the behavior and it’s also disproportionate. But you need to save some face here, so give her a way to get to a win-win for everyone.


This.

I think that was a cruel punishment too.