I finished the writing about it part. What a mess. I hope the other parties involved in this do the right thing. Thanks for the ideas for resources and offers to help.

I'm so sorry, OP. My dissertation (now long ago) focused on infertility and its representation, and ironically I subsequently experienced male/female infertility (multiple factors) and ultimately had several miscarriages both with IVF and with a spontaneous pregnancy, ultimately having a successful full-term (spontaneous) pregnancy but also a great deal of PTSD, from the fertility issues, from a horrific birth story, from ... a lot. I can't say that I've dealt with all of it successfully or unsuccessfully: indeed, even writing the diss was in and of itself a process that's probably still unresolved . . . .

If you're interested in talking privately offline/online, let me know and send me a burner email or a way to DM/PM you and I'll do same. I don't have any great resources to share and as I no longer live in the area I don't have any therapists to recommend locally (nor were my fertility specialists local -- plus this was all a decade plus in the past) but I do have broad shoulders, a good ear, and a lot of sym/em-pathy. I also understand that writing both awakens and resurrects the challenges (and there is a CRUCIAL difference between awakens and resurrects ...) and that you not be ready for either one right now.

I'm terribly sorry for what you're dealing with and what you have dealt with, and I applaud you for seeking help.

Hang in and take care.

Oh please that is such a weird thing to say. It's all body parts to doctors. Even if they find a woman to be in an overall sense attractive. They are not in the business to gawk. I'm sure it can gross most of them out too.

Any male in the Gynecology business is a pervert. Some are more restrained, thats all. Don't go to a male doc.

There was a dr affiliated with Columbia who had been doing this. He was an OB-GYN not an RE though. There should always be two people there, a nurse or other assistant with the RE.