Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I am in the "B" category. We loved the third so much we had a fourth and we love her even more than the third. Just kidding. Kind of.

I had two kids when I was a teenager, and then when I was older and more .... in a place to be a parent, had the third and fourth kids.

Your experience is certainly not the norm on this board.

Yep, I know I'm special.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:B-ish. Try not to sit at home as much but tag along with the fun older kid stuff with baby in tow. Agree with PP, had a 4th, love them more than the 3rd. Not the child themselves, but their fit in the family, etc. 3rd almost broke us but so glad we had another to complete the fam.

For the sake of the well-being (mental and physical health and otherwise) of everyone in your family I’m glad these choices ended up working for you but I cannot imagine feeling like having a third child almost “broke” the family and then deciding that adding another soul is the right choice. Russian roulette seems less risky.

He was a hard baby for the first 6 months. That is all. Very very hard. Not for my older children, they absolutely adored him but it was a struggle for my husband and I. I’m not an idiot here. We knew we were strong enough to handle another rough baby patch if that is what happened with the fourth. Do I think another hard 6 months would be worth it for the years of love and enjoyment beyond that? Yes. Luckily for us the fourth has been a joy as a baby but even if not my family would be just fine. No, I do not think Russian roulette is quite the same. I’m going to assume you are in camp D with your snarkiness. Thanks for your judgment ?

Anonymous wrote:B-ish. Try not to sit at home as much but tag along with the fun older kid stuff with baby in tow. Agree with PP, had a 4th, love them more than the 3rd. Not the child themselves, but their fit in the family, etc. 3rd almost broke us but so glad we had another to complete the fam.

For the sake of the well-being (mental and physical health and otherwise) of everyone in your family I’m glad these choices ended up working for you but I cannot imagine feeling like having a third child almost “broke” the family and then deciding that adding another soul is the right choice. Russian roulette seems less risky.

Anonymous wrote:Ugh we struggle with this every day. Had our first in our mid 20s and second in our early 30s. I’m now 34 and sorta want one more but... that’s so many more years of private school tuition, diapers, bedtimes...

So your oldest is 8-9? No way. NO WAY. Mine are almost-10 and 5.5 and I seriously get flashbacks when I see exhausted run down parents at the pool
or restaurants with screaming 1-2 year olds. Even worse when they have 3/4 kids and the oldest is a happily playing 9 year old who has to be told they need to leave in 5 minutes because their toddler brother is losing his shit.

Once your kids are at the age of no naps, school aged, self sufficient, can do fun stuff all day, it’s insanity to think about going back. Or making those kids deal with a severely curtailed family life because their new 10 years younger sibling needs 2 naps a day. I don’t see how/why people do it. To each their own.

B

Ugh we struggle with this every day. Had our first in our mid 20s and second in our early 30s. I’m now 34 and sorta want one more but... that’s so many more years of private school tuition, diapers, bedtimes...

B

What do you mean by starting over? I had my third when the older ones were 3 and 5 and it felt like starting over but it wasn’t really.

B

Anonymous wrote:this website has a search function

The title says it all. Don't read the post if you don't like it. Go away.

Anonymous wrote:I am in the "B" category. We loved the third so much we had a fourth and we love her even more than the third. Just kidding. Kind of.

I had two kids when I was a teenager, and then when I was older and more .... in a place to be a parent, had the third and fourth kids.

Your experience is certainly not the norm on this board.

Anonymous wrote:Team D allllllll the way

Yes!!!

D. Really wanted a 3rd but my spouse didn’t. So glad we didn’t go for it. 2 kids is stressful and difficult enough as it is.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Team D allllllll the way

Yup, D here, too. So glad we quit while we were ahead!!!

Team D too!!!

Team D by a mile

Anonymous wrote:You forgot E and F: what if I reeeeally want a third (or fifth) and husband does not, and we end up having another and later divorcing? Or, we end up not having another, and I end up being resentful and depressed over feeling that our family is incomplete??

Nope those are included in A and C