I don't think it gets better until you start reading parenting books and implementing.

Most of elementary is pretty easy but some kids need extra help with schoolwork and many many kids in this area have evening activities, whether it be music, sport, tutoring, etc. . . So, less labor but way more on the calendar and that can be just as tough for many working parents.

Middle School and high school are difficult for a whole different set of reasons.

So it never gets tru,y easy, it just gets difficult in different ways.

Yes it got extremely easy for us after 3.5/4.

We have 3 kids btw and our oldest is 11.

4-11 has been smooth sailing of all of them.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:5 is when you will notice a marked uptick in ease. I mean she’s in the terrible twos, you’re right in the thick of it. Families whose youngest is 5 are coasting.

That’s true.
One sort of funny note. Our friends had a 15, and a 6. Coasting...besides all the teenage stuff.
They had a surprise baby! So, they’re in every phase right now. They just need... lots of breaks.

Literally my nightmare. A lot of my coworkers are having babies right now or have 2 year olds and infants and I am happy for them but also think “I am so glad I’m not you.” My kids are 5 and 9 and when I see the parents at the pool with crying toddlers in puddle jumpers I remember being them and shudder.

Elementary school has been the easiest. They do most of the self-care but are never really alone and can't drive so can't get into any real trouble. Hang in there.

I love 5-10. My boys are 6 and 10 and are finally so fun. I really hated the baby stage.

Anonymous wrote:5 is when you will notice a marked uptick in ease. I mean she’s in the terrible twos, you’re right in the thick of it. Families whose youngest is 5 are coasting.

That’s true.
One sort of funny note. Our friends had a 15, and a 6. Coasting...besides all the teenage stuff.
They had a surprise baby! So, they’re in every phase right now. They just need... lots of breaks.

I have 7, 4, 2, so I can’t comment on higher ages.

I love 4-6. I’ll even take a 3yo on a happy day—you could technically take the along on a fun day.

7 has been a combination of very sweet, and we’re also hitting a bumpy spot. I asked my mil about it because I’ve never been so frustrated, and she said with all of her kids they had a rough spot riiiiight before 8. The good times are really sweet. The conversations are getting deeper, and she can read everything. In fact I’m excited we’ll be visiting back in DC (I’m away), and she’s ready for almost every historical site and museum.

So 3+
But better is 4+

Mine are currently 8 and 11 and it’s pretty great right now. I’d say it’s been pretty great for at least two years. Hoping to get another couple years before the oldest goes full blown teenager on me. I have girls - not sure if that matters.

And yet, I’m still wistful for the baby and toddler snuggles and cute preschooler voices. Just sayin’.

This thread has helped me a lot. I've got a 2.5 yo and a 2 month old and it is just so all consuming right now. The "easy" moments last 15 minutes, literally, before someone is melting down again. Knowing that I'm only 1-2 years away from some relief, and maybe 3-4 years away from thinking they are actually easy?! It's so helpful to hear that.

I find that it's either 2 or 3 that sucks. Ours was a doll until nearly 3 and is now much harder. Other kids I've seen make that turn closer to two and by 3 come out the most defiant stages.

5 is when you will notice a marked uptick in ease. I mean she’s in the terrible twos, you’re right in the thick of it. Families whose youngest is 5 are coasting.

With my first things got significantly better around 5 y/o. My second is a wild child so we'll see.

My kid is almost 5, and 4 has been the first year I've thought "wow, our life is pretty easy now" and "the big kid stage is cool, so much more we can do." So...of course I'm pregnant with 2 now and going back to diapers, naps, and no extra money or time off. Wish we'd been able to space them closer together, but that was not in the cards.

My kids are 5 and 7 and it’s still work, but instead of tantrums we can talk through things. Plus they help out around the house.