Anonymous
06/25/2019 13:27
Subject: SIL with house but no money
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:She was the caregiver of her father until he died and now you want her brother to drop her now that she is not of use? Cold.Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:In a depressed area. Not likely to increase in value. House too dilapidated for roommates. I’m concerned that if she sells, she won’t be able to afford anywhere to live.
How is this your problem? Is she special needs?
That's why I asked if she's special needs. If not, then she should get a job. This is not her sibling's problem if she's an able bodied adult. Sounds like she's just entitled and lazy and has been saying she was the "caregiver" for years just to not have to work and have free housing. If she's not special needs, then OP needs to stop enabling her and let her fail.
Your a cruel human being.
Just jaded by generations of slacker relatives in my family who think nothing of "borrowing" money from family for basic living expenses.
Anonymous
06/25/2019 13:26
Subject: SIL with house but no money
I like how everyone is always anti OP. In this thread everyone is telling OP she's cruel for not supporting her sister.
But if OP needed help, everyone would tell her she's terrible for wanting help. You just can't win as an OP
But if OP needed help, everyone would tell her she's terrible for wanting help. You just can't win as an OP
Anonymous
06/25/2019 13:25
Subject: Re:SIL with house but no money
Pp here. DH and I both believe in helping out family.
I would hope that my son would help out my daughter if she was in need.
We are asian American. It is common to help financially.
I would hope that my son would help out my daughter if she was in need.
We are asian American. It is common to help financially.
Anonymous
06/25/2019 13:24
Subject: Re:SIL with house but no money
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:My brother is in a similar situation but my parents are still living. He takes care of them and has a job that covers his spending. He would not be able to pay real estate taxes or repairs. I would pay for them and I’m a SAHM. Many people on this site are cold. My brother is not special needs but he suffers from depression.
So you mean your husband would pay for them?
Yes, my DH earns a high enough income so I don’t have to work. If he didn’t, I would absolutely work to help support my family.
Anonymous
06/25/2019 10:50
Subject: Re:SIL with house but no money
Sell the house and have her rent a one bedroom apartment in a nicer area using the proceeds. Forget about fixing it up and then renting out rooms. That's a lot of effort and she is not capable of managing it and I'm sure you don't want to.
Anonymous
06/25/2019 10:14
Subject: Re:SIL with house but no money
Anonymous wrote:
In a depressed area. Not likely to increase in value. House too dilapidated for roommates. I’m concerned that if she sells, she won’t be able to afford anywhere to live.
But according to you she can’t afford to keep the house either? It sounds like she has no money to cover her living expenses regardless of what happens with the house.
I agree. If the house is dilapidated, someone will have to put money into it sooner or later and it sounds like that might be you OP. Are you willing to do that?
Anonymous
06/25/2019 08:27
Subject: SIL with house but no money
Anonymous wrote:In a depressed area. Not likely to increase in value. House too dilapidated for roommates. I’m concerned that if she sells, she won’t be able to afford anywhere to live.
But according to you she can’t afford to keep the house either? It sounds like she has no money to cover her living expenses regardless of what happens with the house.
Anonymous
06/25/2019 08:23
Subject: Re:SIL with house but no money
Anonymous wrote:My brother is in a similar situation but my parents are still living. He takes care of them and has a job that covers his spending. He would not be able to pay real estate taxes or repairs. I would pay for them and I’m a SAHM. Many people on this site are cold. My brother is not special needs but he suffers from depression.
So you mean your husband would pay for them?
Anonymous
06/25/2019 07:49
Subject: SIL with house but no money
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:She was the caregiver of her father until he died and now you want her brother to drop her now that she is not of use? Cold.Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:In a depressed area. Not likely to increase in value. House too dilapidated for roommates. I’m concerned that if she sells, she won’t be able to afford anywhere to live.
How is this your problem? Is she special needs?
That's why I asked if she's special needs. If not, then she should get a job. This is not her sibling's problem if she's an able bodied adult. Sounds like she's just entitled and lazy and has been saying she was the "caregiver" for years just to not have to work and have free housing. If she's not special needs, then OP needs to stop enabling her and let her fail.
Your a cruel human being.
Anonymous
06/24/2019 21:46
Subject: Re:SIL with house but no money
My brother is in a similar situation but my parents are still living. He takes care of them and has a job that covers his spending. He would not be able to pay real estate taxes or repairs. I would pay for them and I’m a SAHM. Many people on this site are cold. My brother is not special needs but he suffers from depression.
Anonymous
06/21/2019 18:49
Subject: SIL with house but no money
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:She was the caregiver of her father until he died and now you want her brother to drop her now that she is not of use? Cold.Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:In a depressed area. Not likely to increase in value. House too dilapidated for roommates. I’m concerned that if she sells, she won’t be able to afford anywhere to live.
How is this your problem? Is she special needs?
That's why I asked if she's special needs. If not, then she should get a job. This is not her sibling's problem if she's an able bodied adult. Sounds like she's just entitled and lazy and has been saying she was the "caregiver" for years just to not have to work and have free housing. If she's not special needs, then OP needs to stop enabling her and let her fail.
While I have this exact situation going on in my extended family, you're still an ass for immediately assuming the worst when OP has given no indication of her personality or temperament. I know plenty of good, decent people who have no financial awareness. Just because OP wants to help his sister doesn't immediately make her entitled and lazy.
Anonymous
06/21/2019 11:36
Subject: SIL with house but no money
What's the likely value of the house? Does dilapidated in this depressed area mean it's worth $100k? 50k? 25k? Less?
The more it's worth the more it's worth selling, and then just using those funds to buy a smaller but not-dilapidated place for cash, or just to cover rent for several years.
The more it's worth the more it's worth selling, and then just using those funds to buy a smaller but not-dilapidated place for cash, or just to cover rent for several years.
Anonymous
06/21/2019 09:13
Subject: SIL with house but no money
Anonymous wrote:She was the caregiver of her father until he died and now you want her brother to drop her now that she is not of use? Cold.Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:In a depressed area. Not likely to increase in value. House too dilapidated for roommates. I’m concerned that if she sells, she won’t be able to afford anywhere to live.
How is this your problem? Is she special needs?
That's why I asked if she's special needs. If not, then she should get a job. This is not her sibling's problem if she's an able bodied adult. Sounds like she's just entitled and lazy and has been saying she was the "caregiver" for years just to not have to work and have free housing. If she's not special needs, then OP needs to stop enabling her and let her fail.
Anonymous
06/21/2019 09:00
Subject: SIL with house but no money
I’m with the other posters that she should just sell, but one possible other option. Is she old enough for a reverse mortgage? If so, would the payments be enough to cover taxes and repairs? This would allow her to stay in the house until she wants to sell or passes on. Just a thought.
Anonymous
06/20/2019 13:57
Subject: Re:SIL with house but no money
What's the advantage of keeping the house if it's dilapidated? Seems like she should try to find decent housing.