OP, you sound like you have a very distorted view of things. You should be exercising to be fit and healthy not to have a certain body shape. You seem totally unaware that fit and healthy can look like many things. And skinny people aren’t always fit and healthy. You also miss the point of good fitness instruction is the instruction! They aren’t catalog models where you are shopping for a body.

I am very healthy and fit, I teach a couple fitness classes a week, I work out regularly (cardio and weight training), I eat a healthy diet. And I’m built like every other woman on my mother’s side of the family - 5 ft tall, stocky and solid, and with a c section flap stomach that isn’t going anywhere and makes me look flabby. I’m pretty much a fire hydrant or a tree stump. I would probably be the same shape if I didn’t work out if my sister is any indication. My body is nothing that my students would aspire to, but I bet I’m in better shape than most of them, and in better shape than many of the more attractive trainers. And I’m a good teacher, I can motivate anyone, and am great at explaining how to get the most out of your workout.

Don’t judge a book by its cover. Not skinny doesn’t equal out of shape.

As a competitive athlete, I literally could not care less about this issue. I want my fitness instructors to teach and motivate me; those things have nothing to do with appearance. My favorite instructor gained some weight recently—should I stop taking his classes? He kicks my ass is and is awesome, and his body is his business. You worry about yours, OP.

Just go to a different class if you’re that demotivated. The studio isn’t going to fire her for her body shape.

OP, I say this gently and I hope you take it that way - I honestly think you may be a little warped in your thinking about bodies. Your "weight loss journey" should take you to wherever is right for your body, but the truth is that there's a pretty wide range of healthy bodies and exercise (particularly Barre) does a lot of great things for bodies but is only one factor in weight loss/management.

Also, how about a little generosity towards your fellow man? I think you know that this is coming from a pretty negative place, and that's why you're asking if you're a horrible person. I don't think you're a horrible person - it's much more likely that this is just spillover from a pretty toxic self-image that you're trying to rectify by working out to "look like" someone else. Long run, that's probably not going to work no matter how much you weigh.

How about you focus less on what others look like and more on your goals. Genetics...I know people who look more out of shape than some thin people I know, they carry their weight in their stomach and yet, they are out there running ten miles at a time.. something many can't do. Stop putting people in boxes...

Barre is really not going to make you super thin or fit on its own. It’s highly possible she just loves/is good at barre and doesn’t do much other exercise or eat well.

Anonymous wrote:I am on a weight loss journey and belong to a barre studio where there are lots of different and not ideal shapes, myself included. They recently hired an instructor who belongs to that category - not obese but no visible muscle tone and probably 15 lbs overweight. I’m trying to be understanding because I’m not in amazing shape myself, but it is so demotivating working out with an instructor who I have zero interest in looking like. It sucks because she took over several time slots that work best for my schedule. Am I just a horrible person or does anyone else feel like this?

I’ve never wanted to look like any of my fitness instructors, so your complaint is very odd. It’s more important that they’re good at their jobs, approachable and fun. Say you have a really fit and toned instructor who you you want to look like. Years go by and you finally realize you’ll ever achieve her body shape. Would you give up and revert to your unhealthy life? You place too much importance on your instructor’s shape.

I’ve had big-bodied instructors work out with the class and do all the moves we’re doing and I’ve had thin instructors who show the move once but doesn’t work out with us. I prefer the former.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:..."it is so demotivating working out with an instructor who I have zero interest in looking like."

Why does this matter so much to you? I would start from there.

NP here. It matters to me because I’m working out to improve my physical fitness. If the exercise class I’m taking will only result in a physique that’s 20 pounds overweight, well that’s not very motivating.

Most people take barre, Pilates, whatever class because they’re interested in having a toned fit body. The end goal is not to learn to do the perfect plié. People are doing the plié because it promises the end goal of a toned body. An out of shape instructor sends the message that the class doesn’t work. That no matter how well you master the class, you will not be toned and fit.

I don’t know about you, but it would be super demoralizing for me - especially since time is at a premium.

A weekly class does not determine a person's physique. You have no idea what physical/health issues she has, what her diet is, what her sleep is like, what else she does outside of class. I think you need to stop looking at the instructor as your end goal. Even if the instructor had your ideal body, you wouldn't get it from taking their weekly class. You don't have their genes, diet, lifestyle, etc...

For me, I want to be healthy, fit, and injury free. I do a combination of tennis, lifting, pilates, yoga, and hiking. It's not realistic for me to think I'll look the tennis pro, yoga instructor, pilates instructor, or my hiking friends. This is the combo that currently makes me feel fit and energized. I look better when I make good choices, I look bloated when I go out and eat Mexican food and Chinese food and drink over the weekend. It all comes down to all the choices you make for your body.

Anonymous wrote:I get it, OP. Part of it is aspirational. And having an instructor whose body you do not aspire to doesn't fulfill that need.

This is a really sick attitude. Fitness instructors bodies aren't there because they owe you inspiration by conforming to an ideal body type. There is no such thing as an ideal body type -- and the fact that someone doesn't have a BMI of 18 does not mean they aren't fit. And conversely a BMI of 18 does not mean they'll be a good instructor. I can't tell you how many thin, boring, condescending yoga instructors I've had.

I get it, OP. Part of it is aspirational. And having an instructor whose body you do not aspire to doesn't fulfill that need.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I am on a weight loss journey and belong to a barre studio where there are lots of different and not ideal shapes, myself included. They recently hired an instructor who belongs to that category - not obese but no visible muscle tone and probably 15 lbs overweight. I’m trying to be understanding because I’m not in amazing shape myself, but it is so demotivating working out with an instructor who I have zero interest in looking like. It sucks because she took over several time slots that work best for my schedule. Am I just a horrible person or does anyone else feel like this?

The body image issues in this country make me wary of a statement like this. Maybe you think she has no muscle tone and is overweight, but that might not actually be true. Maybe you need to rethink what overweight looks like.

I totally agree. I could see if it were someone who is morbidly obese and could barely move etc. But this description is flawed in so many ways. Does Serena Williams have a “not ideal body type?” My guess is youd say yes.

OP here. Don’t be patronizing - you know I’m not saying my instructor looks like Serena. Like the PP said, I work out to look fit and toned. That comes in many variations, but soft and fluffy is never it.

Pretty ironic that you’re calling people patronizing. And you didn’t answer the question.

+1

OP needs therapy as well as barre.

I would find it motivational to have a good instructor who looks more like me. I would probably pick those classes. I think some of the super fit instructors can be judgmental and I don't like that in an instructor.

Sorry OP not everyone shares your opinion.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I am on a weight loss journey and belong to a barre studio where there are lots of different and not ideal shapes, myself included. They recently hired an instructor who belongs to that category - not obese but no visible muscle tone and probably 15 lbs overweight. I’m trying to be understanding because I’m not in amazing shape myself, but it is so demotivating working out with an instructor who I have zero interest in looking like. It sucks because she took over several time slots that work best for my schedule. Am I just a horrible person or does anyone else feel like this?

The body image issues in this country make me wary of a statement like this. Maybe you think she has no muscle tone and is overweight, but that might not actually be true. Maybe you need to rethink what overweight looks like.

I totally agree. I could see if it were someone who is morbidly obese and could barely move etc. But this description is flawed in so many ways. Does Serena Williams have a “not ideal body type?” My guess is youd say yes.

OP here. Don’t be patronizing - you know I’m not saying my instructor looks like Serena. Like the PP said, I work out to look fit and toned. That comes in many variations, but soft and fluffy is never it.

Pretty ironic that you’re calling people patronizing. And you didn’t answer the question.