Anonymous
05/05/2019 13:52
Subject: Re:Is it okay to ghost an SP?
ghosting is immature way of not facing your feelings
Anonymous
05/05/2019 13:46
Subject: Is it okay to ghost an SP?
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:OP here.
I asked him if he had feelings for me so it was not anything offensive. I just felt crazy at that point because he was acting romantic before and he showed his real colors and intention after the sex. I did regret asking and it was crazy I did but I dont think it was something I need to apologize?
You said in the OP that you had sex just once--did I read that right?
So: He "acted romantic." That got you into bed. Then after he had sex with you, "he showed his real colors and intention" by making an extremely hurtful comment to you. And he has neither tried to talk you into sex again nor has he brought up your "do you have feelings for me" comment. Is that right?
It's clear but you're not seeing it. He wanted sex, not a relationship, and never was romantic or had feelings but played a role just long enough to get you into bed once and he's done. He hoped the comment he made would drive you away. That's immature of him but it's also immature to ghost people so be the adult at last and text him that you and he want different things so you're checking out and won't be in touch. Then block him.
Please think about why you fell for his BS. Don't mistake sex for love or lust for "feelings." Maybe take some time off dating to consider whether your radar for guts is not working.
An arse is always smart in hindsight. lmao
Anonymous
05/05/2019 13:40
Subject: Re:Is it okay to ghost an SP?
Ha. Should be radar for guys, above.
Anonymous
05/05/2019 13:39
Subject: Is it okay to ghost an SP?
Anonymous wrote:OP here.
I asked him if he had feelings for me so it was not anything offensive. I just felt crazy at that point because he was acting romantic before and he showed his real colors and intention after the sex. I did regret asking and it was crazy I did but I dont think it was something I need to apologize?
You said in the OP that you had sex just once--did I read that right?
So: He "acted romantic." That got you into bed. Then after he had sex with you, "he showed his real colors and intention" by making an extremely hurtful comment to you. And he has neither tried to talk you into sex again nor has he brought up your "do you have feelings for me" comment. Is that right?
It's clear but you're not seeing it. He wanted sex, not a relationship, and never was romantic or had feelings but played a role just long enough to get you into bed once and he's done. He hoped the comment he made would drive you away. That's immature of him but it's also immature to ghost people so be the adult at last and text him that you and he want different things so you're checking out and won't be in touch. Then block him.
Please think about why you fell for his BS. Don't mistake sex for love or lust for "feelings." Maybe take some time off dating to consider whether your radar for guts is not working.
Anonymous
05/05/2019 13:32
Subject: Is it okay to ghost an SP?
context clues are your friend.Anonymous wrote:Good grief OP — WHAT IS AN SP?
Anonymous
05/05/2019 13:29
Subject: Is it okay to ghost an SP?
Good grief OP — WHAT IS AN SP?
Anonymous
05/05/2019 12:58
Subject: Is it okay to ghost an SP?
Just tell him in a text, and then block him. Done and done.
Anonymous
05/05/2019 11:57
Subject: Re:Is it okay to ghost an SP?
Special person? Somebody pissed?
Anonymous
05/05/2019 11:48
Subject: Is it okay to ghost an SP?
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Is it bad to just ghost my SP? We dated a bit before sleeping together. Once although we had plans for more. But then my hormones got the better of me and I went crazy on him. He lashed back with an overly honest comment that I couldn't take. Is it better to just ghost him (dont want more hurt) or would you be honest and tell him that comment really offends me? He probably doesnt care
Straightforward - do not engage with the person you can not talk about anything and everything without feeling secure and wonderful.
Relationships usually start with people being really sweet, nice and kind and patient to each other. Then it goes down from there. If you start with emotional jerk then you have no down to go down from there.
Not always the case PP. This is very situational and we don’t have enough details to know what is going on. People here are very quick to shout move on or divorce but people who matter will understand and not quick to write someone off due to a perceived emotional jerk. If that has not been communicated to him then OP is jerking him around.
Anonymous
05/05/2019 11:46
Subject: Re:Is it okay to ghost an SP?
SP? Soul partner or sexual partner?
Anonymous
05/05/2019 11:43
Subject: Is it okay to ghost an SP?
Anonymous wrote:Is it bad to just ghost my SP? We dated a bit before sleeping together. Once although we had plans for more. But then my hormones got the better of me and I went crazy on him. He lashed back with an overly honest comment that I couldn't take. Is it better to just ghost him (dont want more hurt) or would you be honest and tell him that comment really offends me? He probably doesnt care
Straightforward - do not engage with the person you can not talk about anything and everything without feeling secure and wonderful.
Relationships usually start with people being really sweet, nice and kind and patient to each other. Then it goes down from there. If you start with emotional jerk then you have no down to go down from there.
Anonymous
05/05/2019 11:39
Subject: Re:Is it okay to ghost an SP?
Anonymous wrote:Conversely, if he’s treating you like crap, isn’t that a signal it’s over anyway?
Stay away. Don't waste your time and resources. This is the beginning of the divorce while you did not even seriously dated.
Anonymous
05/05/2019 11:37
Subject: Re:Is it okay to ghost an SP?
Conversely, if he’s treating you like crap, isn’t that a signal it’s over anyway?
Anonymous
05/05/2019 11:36
Subject: Is it okay to ghost an SP?
I’m no prude but why do I keep hearing about young women sleeping with guys when they don’t even know if the guy likes or respects them but the women want more than fwb situation? You know, women, you have to love and respect yourself first. Stop giving it up to selfish boys if you want a relationship.
Anonymous
05/05/2019 11:31
Subject: Re:Is it okay to ghost an SP?
OP, do you still care about him? Enough to be frank with him? If so, then give it some time. I believe that in this life, you get what you give. If you want his care and romance you have to be willing to give it away. If you no longer care about him and you want it to end, then ghosting is the way to move forward. You are hurt and if he switched up his feelings it is likely that he is hurt too. You can’t read his mind. Just keep being yourself and he should come around. Be honest with him.