This is not a budget issue - this is a communication and common sense issue. Your parents sound like jerks and you need to tell them that you're not going to vacation with them anymore unless they do a, b & c. And don't let your inlays book hotels for you - book your own hotels and then you won't pay $260 for a 3-star la quinta.

We make more money than many in our family and if we vacation with them, we typically rent the house and pay for that ourselves. That leaves their budget to be able to participate in shared activities, dinners out, etc.

Yes, she is ridiculous. I always pay for my sister and her family's travel expenses because I know they can't afford it. I don't invite them, unless I pay for it all or it won't happen. Was there no way to talk to her calmly about it, before rescinding your invitation?

OP here. We've tried staying at different hotels and then meeting up. But they need significant help with finding parking, they'd be late, etc. They're just 60, not elderly at all. They probably wouldn't show up until 11am and then want lunch immediately and whine about the restaurant.

My inlaws do this to us also, except we make significantly more money than them. They stay in bad hotels for $$$ and can't ever seem to get a good deal. We paid $280 for a La Quinta with them which killed our trip budget.

And no, no one has ever paid for our hotel since we were 21.

Your parents are total assholes. Stop vacationing with them.

I am saying this with sincerity. My parents are also total assholes and there isn't enough money in the world for me to vacation with them. Why do that to yourself?

Anonymous wrote:My parents are similar. Why don’t you just stay at different hotels do you each get what you prefer in terms of lodging? My other suggestion is cruises. We do a lot of cruises with my parents because we can each get the room type we prefer, suite for them , less expensive room for us but you can still meet up for meals in the shop and activities.

This is good if the parents then shut up. I also would not want to hear about how I’m “slumming it” throughout vacation.

My parents are similar. Why don’t you just stay at different hotels do you each get what you prefer in terms of lodging? My other suggestion is cruises. We do a lot of cruises with my parents because we can each get the room type we prefer, suite for them , less expensive room for us but you can still meet up for meals in the shop and activities.

We are similar to you, it seems, regarding finances and how we spend.

You're not the crazy one here. You planned a trip, you invited them to meet up during the trip - they don't get to change your plans. They can meet you based on the time and place of your bookings or they can not come. If they want to stay at an expensive place further out, fine, but they have to meet you where you invited them to come, especially since you've got the kids