As long as he had made it clear that you will not reconcile there are no issues with him dating. Good on him!

Er... no. Just no.
And I haven't been an angel all my life, but I wouldn't do that.

crappy thing to do

Anonymous wrote:Is this ok or not? Sometimes it's hard to see clearly. Kids are involved all around.

You're very controlling, aren't you, OP?

Probably that's a large part of why you're being dumped for your ex-friend.

Reality check sweetie.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Pathetic. Is she that desperate and incapable of finding someone who won’t generate school yard gossip?

Is he so desperate and incapable that he can’t find someone who won’t cause school yard gossip? Why do we always blame the woman?

I think it's trashy by him too, but OP doesn't have any claim to loyalty from her ex. She does have claim to loyalty from a friend, so the friend's behavior is worse (I'm assuming this is a former friend only now that she's dating the ex, if they fell out years ago, then the former friendship is irrelevant here).

Anonymous wrote:You are moving on. Why do you care? Worry about you, not about him.

OP says kids are involved in both sides. That's reason for concern as the situation could be very upsetting and confusing for kids; however there's not a lot OP can do except decide how she will act in front of her own kids and how she'll answer any questions they ask.

OP--are your kids and the woman's kids friends? Friends outside school? Maybe just classmates or in the same school but different grades--? The existing relationship if any between the two sets of kids does matter here, I think. If your kids and hers are goo friends now, this change could affect the kids on levels beyond just "dad and mom are divorcing."....In your shoes I honestly would see a therapist or counselor ASAP and ask for help both processing your divorce yourself and help deciding how to talk to your kids when you're emotional and angry. I'd need a script to help me stay calm when having to talk to him and a plan for how to react if I ran into her.

I'm sorry about this. Same thing happened to two families I knew. The dad ended up marrying the family friend pretty soon after the divorce was final. If that happens in your case, all the more reason to get outside help and ideas on how to present as the calmest person you can be for your kids.

It is not waste of your time. It just adds more to the drama and you are better off. Concentrate on yourself and the kids. This is a bad situation but you will get through it and the kids will know what an awesome parent you are. Kids can see what is happening. Be the better parent.

Anonymous wrote:Oh helllllll naw. I'm not even divorced, but under no circumstances would this ever be ok-either now or in the future.

You do know you don't get a vote, right?

Anonymous wrote:Pathetic. Is she that desperate and incapable of finding someone who won’t generate school yard gossip?

Is he so desperate and incapable that he can’t find someone who won’t cause school yard gossip? Why do we always blame the woman?

Need more info about former friend

Nope, not ok. Sorry OP.

It’s kinda trashy but why expend so much energy on it?

You are moving on. Why do you care? Worry about you, not about him.

Ew.

You don’t shit where you eat, and you really don’t shit where your kids eat.