Anonymous wrote:Are you sure DD didn’t break her own phone and is blaming it on her roommate because she is afraid of repercussions? Have you considered this as a possibility?

No.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Sounds like a public U. And people wonder why UMC and wealthy pay a premium for private colleges...

Why does sounds like a public U? There are unhinged freshmen and inept RA's everywhere. Young people learning to deal with lots of new life lessons.

Because only the poors and the plebes can be unhinged, dontcha know.

Are you sure DD didn’t break her own phone and is blaming it on her roommate because she is afraid of repercussions? Have you considered this as a possibility?

Anonymous wrote:Sounds like a public U. And people wonder why UMC and wealthy pay a premium for private colleges...

Why does sounds like a public U? There are unhinged freshmen and inept RA's everywhere. Young people learning to deal with lots of new life lessons.

Anonymous wrote:i don't understand why you have allowed it to go this far.

DD just "came clean" about it last week.

Anonymous wrote:Move to the single.

Growing up is hard to do.

What does this mean? And yes, she is moving in 3 days.

i don't understand why you have allowed it to go this far.

Anonymous wrote:Sounds like a public U. And people wonder why UMC and wealthy pay a premium for private colleges...

She attends an expensive, selective private college.

Sounds like a public U. And people wonder why UMC and wealthy pay a premium for private colleges...

Your daughter should absolutely report all of it to the Resident Director (person who supervises RAs).

Campus Security should be notified about the destruction of property. (And the RA's supervisor should be notified that - if she knew about the iPhone - she didn't follow what I'm sure must be protocol.)

I was sexually assaulted by a student when I was a freshman. A therapist later told me what I should have done was call the police. It had never occurred to me that you were allowed to do that if you lived at a college campus. Your daughter has that option, too. The RA can't do anything. Small claims court or the police can.

Move to the single.

Growing up is hard to do.

Move your DD into the single. You DD can just come up with some sort of excuse... 'I haven't slept well, I need to focus on my studies and need a single, etc...". The girl may end up keeping the existing room as a single for the rest of the year and she may like that.

OP,

You need to learn how to communicate salient points in your first post.

The breaking of the phone should have been reported to an adult at once, and police possibly contacted. That and all other events which rise to that level.

At this point, your daughter should document this with an adult in charge in order to signal that her roommate is potentially mentally disturbed, and not hesitate to move since this is affecting her sense of security.

If you wanted financial compensation, your DD should have filed a police report immediately. You should both learn from this experience.