Anonymous wrote:OP here. Clarification-spouse demoted staff, that person was moved to different agency, a month later staff files complaint for sexual harrasement and discrimination. A few weeks later HR dismissed the complaint. I didn’t get any details other than it was relatalitory for the demotion and largely based in perceived treatment after parental leave.

Do you have reason to doubt your husband's side of the story?

To answer your question - I've seen this sort of thing happen to a male coworker after he had to fire a female employee. In the end, her accusations were proven to be retaliatory. But it sure was an ugly process to watch him go through. Sometimes people get angry when they are fired or demoted and simply want to get back at the person who let them go.

In an unrelated situation, I have also seen a male employee who was found to be responsible for sexual harassment. That was also an extremely difficult and ugly process to watch the female accuser go through.

Both times the company (and lawyers) were able to get to the bottom of what happened.

Anonymous wrote:A slightly off color joke could get you slapped with sexual harassment. If a group laughed at said joke, they get one too.

My husband told me he would never hire a woman. I can't blame him. They are TROUBLE. Although he does work with women, he won't hire one.

I guess misogyny is always more effective when they have a woman agreeing! You must not work. Thanks for making things harder for us working women.

Anonymous wrote:A slightly off color joke could get you slapped with sexual harassment. If a group laughed at said joke, they get one too.

My husband told me he would never hire a woman. I can't blame him. They are TROUBLE. Although he does work with women, he won't hire one.

In my experience, men file more complaints. They base them on age and "reprisal"

A slightly off color joke could get you slapped with sexual harassment. If a group laughed at said joke, they get one too.

My husband told me he would never hire a woman. I can't blame him. They are TROUBLE. Although he does work with women, he won't hire one.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Omg I am on DCUM too much but there was a post like this in the last year or so. Someone whose DH worked in a remote location was part of a group of men accused of sexual harassment.

Yes! Was just thinking about that.

Me, three! DCUM, more addictive than crack.

Female boss here. These complaints are very common and as a woman l hate to say it, but trust the results of the investigation. So many people target bosses with bogus complaints of various forma of harrassment. I am married to another executive and I wouldn't bat an eye if he got an accusation of sexual harrassment. Or if his employer paid to settle, which is common whether the complaint is true or not. Now, if his employer disciplined him or found him at fault... that would give me pause.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Guy here: I’ve had a woman at work pull me into HR for sexual discrimination because I didn’t hire her. I didn’t hire her because she wasn’t a good fit for the role. I had a pretty meticulous examination from HR and I had a LOT of explaining to do. It turns out that I was the 5th guy she had pulled into HR for various reasons.

How did you manage the situation with your spouse? Was she aware of the situation from the beginning? That's what really relevant here.

Harassment and discrimination are qualitatively very different. Certainly within the context of marital fidelity/honesty.

Employment lawyer here. I find that people have only the haziest notions of what harassment and discrimination mean. And don't get me started about hostile work environment.

Oh, I'd like to get you started. I know the dictionary definitions of harassment and discrimination but feel they are misapplied in the workplace, particularly the former. Asking a coworker out for a coffee is not "harassment."

I'm not really sure what 'hostile work environment' means.

OP here. Clarification-spouse demoted staff, that person was moved to different agency, a month later staff files complaint for sexual harrasement and discrimination. A few weeks later HR dismissed the complaint. I didn’t get any details other than it was relatalitory for the demotion and largely based in perceived treatment after parental leave.

Anonymous wrote:I don’t know the details of the case, but the employer dismissed it. I’ve always totally trusted my spouse but can’t help but wonder. Is that crazy?

Everyone assumed it is a man. OP did not indicate it was a man.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Guy here: I’ve had a woman at work pull me into HR for sexual discrimination because I didn’t hire her. I didn’t hire her because she wasn’t a good fit for the role. I had a pretty meticulous examination from HR and I had a LOT of explaining to do. It turns out that I was the 5th guy she had pulled into HR for various reasons.

How did you manage the situation with your spouse? Was she aware of the situation from the beginning? That's what really relevant here.

Harassment and discrimination are qualitatively very different. Certainly within the context of marital fidelity/honesty.

Employment lawyer here. I find that people have only the haziest notions of what harassment and discrimination mean. And don't get me started about hostile work environment.

+1
Clearly the first poster needs a refresher training. Huge difference between sexual discrimination vs sexual harassment.

My DH was sued for harassment by a woman he had terminated for poor performance. It was dismissed when he provided numerous memos to HR outlining her performance and her bitterness in dealing with poor evaluations. In addition, many women he worked with over the years submitted letters of support for him as well as saying what a bad apple the woman was. It was an awful thing for my DH to go through and I'm sure it has affected his working relationships with women.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Guy here: I’ve had a woman at work pull me into HR for sexual discrimination because I didn’t hire her. I didn’t hire her because she wasn’t a good fit for the role. I had a pretty meticulous examination from HR and I had a LOT of explaining to do. It turns out that I was the 5th guy she had pulled into HR for various reasons.

How did you manage the situation with your spouse? Was she aware of the situation from the beginning? That's what really relevant here.

Harassment and discrimination are qualitatively very different. Certainly within the context of marital fidelity/honesty.

I’m just saying that a false claim by a crazy person is not outside the realm of possibility.

No doubt. Spouse is in upper management and has seen/heard it all. What’s amazing is the crazies that scream ridiculously loud, while the ones hat actually have a claim bow their heads and switch departments.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Guy here: I’ve had a woman at work pull me into HR for sexual discrimination because I didn’t hire her. I didn’t hire her because she wasn’t a good fit for the role. I had a pretty meticulous examination from HR and I had a LOT of explaining to do. It turns out that I was the 5th guy she had pulled into HR for various reasons.

How did you manage the situation with your spouse? Was she aware of the situation from the beginning? That's what really relevant here.

Harassment and discrimination are qualitatively very different. Certainly within the context of marital fidelity/honesty.

I’m just saying that a false claim by a crazy person is not outside the realm of possibility.

And a real claim by a “sane” person is also not outside the realm of possibility.

Wanna know why women bristle over hearing these kinds of things about their spouse?

Hint: Probably because they’ve had it happen to them, with someone else’s spouse.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Guy here: I’ve had a woman at work pull me into HR for sexual discrimination because I didn’t hire her. I didn’t hire her because she wasn’t a good fit for the role. I had a pretty meticulous examination from HR and I had a LOT of explaining to do. It turns out that I was the 5th guy she had pulled into HR for various reasons.

How did you manage the situation with your spouse? Was she aware of the situation from the beginning? That's what really relevant here.

Harassment and discrimination are qualitatively very different. Certainly within the context of marital fidelity/honesty.

I’m just saying that a false claim by a crazy person is not outside the realm of possibility.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Guy here: I’ve had a woman at work pull me into HR for sexual discrimination because I didn’t hire her. I didn’t hire her because she wasn’t a good fit for the role. I had a pretty meticulous examination from HR and I had a LOT of explaining to do. It turns out that I was the 5th guy she had pulled into HR for various reasons.

How did you manage the situation with your spouse? Was she aware of the situation from the beginning? That's what really relevant here.

Harassment and discrimination are qualitatively very different. Certainly within the context of marital fidelity/honesty.

Employment lawyer here. I find that people have only the haziest notions of what harassment and discrimination mean. And don't get me started about hostile work environment.