Anonymous
Post 08/27/2018 21:20     Subject: Re:Open relationship
Anonymous wrote:What did you hope to achieve by opening up the relationship? Who first suggested it? Was the thrill of sleeping with women without your wife there really worth this? It seems like you were already able to do whatever you wanted with other women, right? What was the big downer about having your wife there?

I can definitely understand things from the woman's perspective, just not sure what big difference it would have made to you.


He thought he had a little game but quickly found out otherwise.
Anonymous
Post 08/27/2018 20:54     Subject: Re:Open relationship
What did you hope to achieve by opening up the relationship? Who first suggested it? Was the thrill of sleeping with women without your wife there really worth this? It seems like you were already able to do whatever you wanted with other women, right? What was the big downer about having your wife there?

I can definitely understand things from the woman's perspective, just not sure what big difference it would have made to you.
Anonymous
Post 08/27/2018 20:42     Subject: Open relationship
The best way for a married man to get sex is to flirt with another married women. Odds are high that any random married woman you pick is totally bored with her husband, not the least bit attracted to him, and chooses no sex over sex with DH. This describes 90% of DCUM viewership. All you need to do is flirt a bit, show her some attention. Since you are the new exciting guy, you will quickly gain her interest.
Anonymous
Post 08/27/2018 16:32     Subject: Re:Open relationship
Anonymous wrote:OP, the sad reality is you are a dime a dozen. Married man looking for just sex but not willing to offer a relationship is basically every married man out there. And your being open is actually worse than being married because there is no thrill of the affair nor a chance of a woman poaching you.

As others said, get permission from your wife for a long term girlfriend, and then you have a shot.

Otherwise, you can compete with a woman for NSA sex just as well as you could compete with a camel in the desert


Many posters have said the same thing, over and over. You are getting the short end of the stick with a open relationship. Open relationship requests often come from men with wives who are not interested in having sex with them any longer, not from high libido wives. The request for an open relationship is a last ditch effort for a wife to keep her husband, so they go along with the scenario. The husbands in these instances could care less whether their wives are getting it on the side. But you do and are jealous.
Anonymous
Post 08/27/2018 16:24     Subject: Re:Open relationship
A woman creates an on line profile looking for a dinner date but no possibility of sex, ever. How many men respond?

See the problem?
Anonymous
Post 08/27/2018 16:11     Subject: Re:Open relationship
OP, the sad reality is you are a dime a dozen. Married man looking for just sex but not willing to offer a relationship is basically every married man out there. And your being open is actually worse than being married because there is no thrill of the affair nor a chance of a woman poaching you.

As others said, get permission from your wife for a long term girlfriend, and then you have a shot.

Otherwise, you can compete with a woman for NSA sex just as well as you could compete with a camel in the desert
Anonymous
Post 08/27/2018 15:38     Subject: Open relationship
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:Single woman here. . . Please don't involve yourself in any sort of deceptive game. You should consider sponsoring a college student. You can figure it into your monthly budget and receive the attention that you need. There are plenty of college women in the area that might be interested in such an arrangement. Also, if it is a monthly stipend, it's a little less obvious than dinner and dates to your wife. Just cash out of your account. Be sure to get a vasectomy first, you don't want a temporary situation to become an 18 year arrangement.


LOL...Yeah, walk around college campuses and offer women cash for companionship. You'd end up getting beat up and/or worse, jailed for solicitation.


He would use the same Ashley Madison style dating apps that previous posters suggested. Who do you think is on these apps looking for sugar daddies?
Anonymous
Post 08/27/2018 15:37     Subject: Open relationship
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:Let your wife be your wing-woman so to speak.


This is not a bad idea. We've done that for each other and it works rather effectively in person. I've was talking about online apps/site where she's having no trouble meeting people and I've got no interest.

The apps will be tough for you, you’d probably have a much easier time just focusing on meeting women in person.


If he is average, not really. A lot of married cheating men met their AP in professional settings. Unless he has this option, going to random happy hours, and other places will not work. The truth is, older married men looking for sex are not commodities. There are so many sexless marriages, "open" relationships, and single guys looking for sex, that it floods the market.

He might need to get a few professional quality photos, a well-written profile, and include a few promises in his bio.
Anonymous
Post 08/27/2018 15:33     Subject: Open relationship
Anonymous wrote:Single woman here. . . Please don't involve yourself in any sort of deceptive game. You should consider sponsoring a college student. You can figure it into your monthly budget and receive the attention that you need. There are plenty of college women in the area that might be interested in such an arrangement. Also, if it is a monthly stipend, it's a little less obvious than dinner and dates to your wife. Just cash out of your account. Be sure to get a vasectomy first, you don't want a temporary situation to become an 18 year arrangement.


LOL...Yeah, walk around college campuses and offer women cash for companionship. You'd end up getting beat up and/or worse, jailed for solicitation.
Anonymous
Post 08/27/2018 15:23     Subject: Open relationship
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:Let your wife be your wing-woman so to speak.


This is not a bad idea. We've done that for each other and it works rather effectively in person. I've was talking about online apps/site where she's having no trouble meeting people and I've got no interest.

The apps will be tough for you, you’d probably have a much easier time just focusing on meeting women in person.
Anonymous
Post 08/27/2018 14:54     Subject: Open relationship
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:Let your wife be your wing-woman so to speak.


This is not a bad idea. We've done that for each other and it works rather effectively in person. I've was talking about online apps/site where she's having no trouble meeting people and I've got no interest.


If you are not really attractive, tall and well built, you are going to have a hard time. There are tons of conference and business travelers that flood the online sites looking for sex. There's fresh produce coming into DC looking for casual relationships each week. Ot will get more difficult in the early Fall.

It's hard to accept but true. My FWB is 6 feet 1 inches, well built, and nice looking. He has other physical assets too. Why would I accept anything else? He helps to take the edge off while dating. Unfortunately, this option isn't as available for single or married men.
Anonymous
Post 08/27/2018 14:43     Subject: Re:Open relationship
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:Hi OP, married man who was in your shoes. Wife had a lot of dates, I didn't have so many, which wasn't a big surprise although if we were both single I would have zero trouble attracting high quality women.

The problem is obvious: in general, women don't want "just sex" which is what you are basically advertising. In general, men love "just sex" which is what your wife is advertising.

Now, the way I got more interest was to advertise for more of a relationship. Meaning, to level the playing field, I had to be allowed to open up the relationship to allow me to take other women on awesome dates, overnights in fancy hotels, even a weekend away. I had many more women interested in this. The problem was, my wife was jealous of the fact I was planning a NYC weekend with one very attractive woman I met. It wasn't just the emotional intimacy, but the money we were going to spend.

Point being, just "opening" the marriage for sex isn't really a fair trade for men (unless you get off on your wife getting off with others). To be fair for both, your wife needs to let you bond emotionally and financially with other women, and the hot sex will follow. Will she?

This is spot on 100% the truth. Women agree to sex in order to have a relationship. Men agree to a relationship in order to have sex. See the problem there? Revise the terms so you can offer some semblance of a relationship, this is the key to attracting women for sex.


Yup, this
Anonymous
Post 08/27/2018 14:40     Subject: Open relationship
Single woman here. . . Please don't involve yourself in any sort of deceptive game. You should consider sponsoring a college student. You can figure it into your monthly budget and receive the attention that you need. There are plenty of college women in the area that might be interested in such an arrangement. Also, if it is a monthly stipend, it's a little less obvious than dinner and dates to your wife. Just cash out of your account. Be sure to get a vasectomy first, you don't want a temporary situation to become an 18 year arrangement.
Anonymous
Post 08/27/2018 14:39     Subject: Open relationship
Anonymous wrote:Let your wife be your wing-woman so to speak.


This is not a bad idea. We've done that for each other and it works rather effectively in person. I've was talking about online apps/site where she's having no trouble meeting people and I've got no interest.
Anonymous
Post 08/27/2018 14:18     Subject: Re:Open relationship
Anonymous wrote:OP, I think being in your situation is challenging. Most single women are not looking for a married man. The only small advice I can give is to ditch your wedding ring when not out with your wife. I'm not sure where one can go to find other married people in open marriages. I feel like open married woman should be your target.

I'm an open married woman. I'd be happy to chat, if you'd like.


Thanks for the offer. I'd be happy to chat with you as well. Do you have a account here...I do for explicit relationship board. Maybe we can DM there.