This is even a question?

Anonymous wrote:He’ll yes. And there would be severe penalties if I found out he vaped again.

Hell yes.

He’ll yes. And there would be severe penalties if I found out he vaped again.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:If you confiscate he will hide the next one he buys. I would set reasonable limits on how much he uses it, where he uses it, and insist that whatever he's vaping must be legal.

If you can't enforce the limit of NEVER, how do you propose to enforce your "reasonable limit on how much, where, and what"? You have admitted you can't control him. By your logic he'll just hide that he's ignoring your "reasonable limits".

DH had to have this conversation with our DS, and explained that if he's going to vape he better not ever do it front of me, grandma, little kids, etc. DH told him he would be tested if he ever suspected there he was vaping anything illegal.

Anonymous wrote:If you confiscate he will hide the next one he buys. I would set reasonable limits on how much he uses it, where he uses it, and insist that whatever he's vaping must be legal.

If you can't enforce the limit of NEVER, how do you propose to enforce your "reasonable limit on how much, where, and what"? You have admitted you can't control him. By your logic he'll just hide that he's ignoring your "reasonable limits".

Anonymous wrote:If you confiscate he will hide the next one he buys. I would set reasonable limits on how much he uses it, where he uses it, and insist that whatever he's vaping must be legal.

The reasonable limit for vaping is: no vaping.

If you confiscate he will hide the next one he buys. I would set reasonable limits on how much he uses it, where he uses it, and insist that whatever he's vaping must be legal.

I found one in my 15 yo ds' room. I threw it away and we talked about the negative health consequences. He was warned that he would lose certain privileges if I find any other evidence he is vaping. I also understand that he could always get another one and I can't really control what he does when not in my presence.

Yes. Why is this even a question?

I’d throw them out every time I found them. I’d talk about the devastating health consequences. I’d cut their allowance. I’d take the door off their room. I’d do whatever it took to intervene. But then I spent my childhood watching someone die from lung cancer.

depends what he's vaping

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Knowing full well if they want to do it they’ll get new ones? Or just talk to them about your disapproval, health risks, etc?

With what money?

Certain kids in my neighborhood resort to either dealing, or breaking and entering, to support their habits.

That's a separate, additional problem.

I would confiscate for sure.

Then we would have a conversation about choices and privileges. For now he’s going to need to work for his money.

Sorry kid, if you break trust, you need to earn it back.

Why are some reticent to pare their kids. I'd confiscate it in a heart beat, have the education talk and also punish accordingly. There are serious health risks associated with vaping. They all may be doing it, but that doesn't make it right.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Knowing full well if they want to do it they’ll get new ones? Or just talk to them about your disapproval, health risks, etc?

With what money?

Certain kids in my neighborhood resort to either dealing, or breaking and entering, to support their habits.

Those are kids who need more and better supervision by their parents. Which, coincidentally, is what OP's son needs right now until he changes his behavior. OP, there has been a lot of talk about your son but I think that you also need to look at his friend group and also his activities. Peer pressure is awfully hard to resist.

One way to lessen the influence of the peer group is by talking to him about it. Read the book Masterminds and Wingmen. It is a book about peer pressure and other issues, and how to help your boy navigate through it all. It is written by the same woman (Rosalind Wiseman) who wrote the seminal book Queen Bees and Wannabees about relational aggression and girls.

Your son is going to need some help getting through and past this. It won't be one and done by confiscating the materials. You will need to help him so be prepared for it. That isn't a bad thing just something to recognize.

Good luck. And don't back down about the vaping!

What a bizarre question.