Anonymous
Post 08/02/2018 07:20     Subject: Told the wife she has no right to demand an answer...
Man comes on forum to complain about wife not having sex with him then admits that sex is not important to him.

DCUM classic.
Anonymous
Post 08/02/2018 07:20     Subject: Re:Told the wife she has no right to demand an answer...
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Nah, you don't get it. You are reacting to her cutting off of sex. You have no agency in this deal. She gets everything she wants. Even having to secure a married AP will be work for you. If it were even, make her find you a substitute for her wifely duties.


OP here… I fear it is you that misunderstands… There is no such thing a “wifely duties”… Relationships are what the people involved make of them, not a set list of things you have to have or do. Ours is far from perfect, and none of the sides are extremely happy about it… or have the upper hand…


Well, why are you here complaining about her not having sex with you. Accept that your sex life is dead and continue with the marriage. Stop whining.


DCUM would be dead without whining...
Anonymous
Post 08/02/2018 07:19     Subject: Re:Told the wife she has no right to demand an answer...
Anonymous wrote:Fix you "non-related issues" and stop avoiding your kids.

If you said, I spend more time out of the house taking the kids places then I would think, great. But you are just neglecting your kids.

I am sorry you have "non-related" mental healthy issues, please get those resolved and stop neglecting the kids.

Your wife has no business knowing you sex life if she is not a part of it but this has nothing to do with sex, you just wanted to start a fight.

You start fights and neglect spending time with the kids... those are you issues, not how much sex you are having.

Fix the non-related issues before you pull another woman into your mess of a way of dealing with people and issues.


OP here... there's enough time when the kids are at school, or asleep, or doing their own thing... to be out doing my own thing without neglecting the kids being an issue...
Anonymous
Post 08/02/2018 07:18     Subject: Re:Told the wife she has no right to demand an answer...
Anonymous wrote:
Nah, you don't get it. You are reacting to her cutting off of sex. You have no agency in this deal. She gets everything she wants. Even having to secure a married AP will be work for you. If it were even, make her find you a substitute for her wifely duties.


OP here… I fear it is you that misunderstands… There is no such thing a “wifely duties”… Relationships are what the people involved make of them, not a set list of things you have to have or do. Ours is far from perfect, and none of the sides are extremely happy about it… or have the upper hand…


Well, why are you here complaining about her not having sex with you. Accept that your sex life is dead and continue with the marriage. Stop whining.
Anonymous
Post 08/02/2018 07:16     Subject: Told the wife she has no right to demand an answer...
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:You two should divorce. The sooner the better. Before you start sleeping with married women or prostitutes and introducing drama and disease into your, the kids, and your wife’s lives. Just pull off the bandaid and call a lawyer today.

Your wife is never going to trust you again after that comment.


Why would he be concerned? She nullified the marriage. They are roommates.


OP here... You seem to associate marriage with a single set of behaviors (mainly sex)... and that's just not always the case. You also seem to confuse safe sex with marital sex...
Anonymous
Post 08/02/2018 07:15     Subject: Told the wife she has no right to demand an answer...
OP I'd do everything you can now to establish yourself as the primary caregiver. You should get divorced and you should go for 50% custody. Life is too short to live the way you are living.

I know it's hard to get divorced, but i's better than staying in a bad marriage. What are you modeling for your kids to expect from their partner?

Why is divorce so expensive? Because it's worth it.
Anonymous
Post 08/02/2018 07:14     Subject: Re:Told the wife she has no right to demand an answer...

Nah, you don't get it. You are reacting to her cutting off of sex. You have no agency in this deal. She gets everything she wants. Even having to secure a married AP will be work for you. If it were even, make her find you a substitute for her wifely duties.


OP here… I fear it is you that misunderstands… There is no such thing a “wifely duties”… Relationships are what the people involved make of them, not a set list of things you have to have or do. Ours is far from perfect, and none of the sides are extremely happy about it… or have the upper hand…
Anonymous
Post 08/02/2018 07:14     Subject: Told the wife she has no right to demand an answer...
Anonymous wrote:You two should divorce. The sooner the better. Before you start sleeping with married women or prostitutes and introducing drama and disease into your, the kids, and your wife’s lives. Just pull off the bandaid and call a lawyer today.

Your wife is never going to trust you again after that comment.


Why would he be concerned? She nullified the marriage. They are roommates.
Anonymous
Post 08/02/2018 07:13     Subject: Re:Told the wife she has no right to demand an answer...
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:Insinuating you are sleeping around is a great way to get her to want to have sex with you. Who doesn't want an STD from their husband?


+1

You actually did her a favor because she knows it’s finally time for her to call a divorce lawyer.


OP here... She could have, and still, can call a lawyer any time she wants to... she's a lawyer herself and has plenty of knowledge on how to, and friends who can provide help. If she had wanted out, she could have found the door without your (or my) advice...


She is holding all of the cards.


OP here... We both are. Each his/her shitty hand


Nah, you don't get it. You are reacting to her cutting off of sex. You have no agency in this deal. She gets everything she wants. Even having to secure a married AP will be work for you. If it were even, make her find you a substitute for her wifely duties.
Anonymous
Post 08/02/2018 07:11     Subject: Told the wife she has no right to demand an answer...
You two should divorce. The sooner the better. Before you start sleeping with married women or prostitutes and introducing drama and disease into your, the kids, and your wife’s lives. Just pull off the bandaid and call a lawyer today.

Your wife is never going to trust you again after that comment.
Anonymous
Post 08/02/2018 07:11     Subject: Re:Told the wife she has no right to demand an answer...
Anonymous wrote:Fix you "non-related issues" and stop avoiding your kids.

If you said, I spend more time out of the house taking the kids places then I would think, great. But you are just neglecting your kids.

I am sorry you have "non-related" mental healthy issues, please get those resolved and stop neglecting the kids.

Your wife has no business knowing you sex life if she is not a part of it but this has nothing to do with sex, you just wanted to start a fight.

You start fights and neglect spending time with the kids... those are you issues, not how much sex you are having.

Fix the non-related issues before you pull another woman into your mess of a way of dealing with people and issues.


He didn't say he was neglecting the kids. Stop projecting.
Anonymous
Post 08/02/2018 07:10     Subject: Re:Told the wife she has no right to demand an answer...
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:OP here. Wasn't insinuating a thing, and am smart enough to have safe sex if I were.


of course you are insinuating something. Otherwise you would have said no.

You wanted to make her feel jealous and insecure and it’s working. Congratulations.

It’s rather pathetic that you hate your relationship this much but lack the conviction to leave. Staying for financial reasons? Are you unable to support yourself and your children?

Staying in a relationship like this where you hold your spouses in contempt is worse for your kids than separating. Your kids are learning this unhealthy and dysfunctional behavior. Speaking from experience it’s really better for them to not be raised in this environment.


OP here… I would not presume to know what’s best for kids in a situation I (you actually) know little about. I would also think that misunderstanding the difference between financial hardships of divorce and “you unable to support yourself and your children” probably indicates you are young, and somewhat lucky to have not had to think about such matters in depth… This is one of those fields where you having "experience" does very little in terms of making you any better at it...
Anonymous
Post 08/02/2018 07:10     Subject: Told the wife she has no right to demand an answer...
You aren't having sex with her, so your sexual activities ARE none of her damned business! My only surprise here is that you claim to not already be enjoying your open marriage. Why haven't you?
Anonymous
Post 08/02/2018 07:09     Subject: Re:Told the wife she has no right to demand an answer...
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:Insinuating you are sleeping around is a great way to get her to want to have sex with you. Who doesn't want an STD from their husband?


+1

You actually did her a favor because she knows it’s finally time for her to call a divorce lawyer.


OP here... She could have, and still, can call a lawyer any time she wants to... she's a lawyer herself and has plenty of knowledge on how to, and friends who can provide help. If she had wanted out, she could have found the door without your (or my) advice...


She is holding all of the cards.


OP here... We both are. Each his/her shitty hand


Nah, you don't get it. You are reacting to her cutting off of sex. You have no agency in this deal. She gets everything she wants. Even having to secure a married AP will be work for you. If it were even, make her find you a substitute for her wifely duties.
Anonymous
Post 08/02/2018 07:09     Subject: Re:Told the wife she has no right to demand an answer...
Fix you "non-related issues" and stop avoiding your kids.

If you said, I spend more time out of the house taking the kids places then I would think, great. But you are just neglecting your kids.

I am sorry you have "non-related" mental healthy issues, please get those resolved and stop neglecting the kids.

Your wife has no business knowing you sex life if she is not a part of it but this has nothing to do with sex, you just wanted to start a fight.

You start fights and neglect spending time with the kids... those are you issues, not how much sex you are having.

Fix the non-related issues before you pull another woman into your mess of a way of dealing with people and issues.