Anonymous wrote:We're debating the same thing. Except that I'm Jewish and my husband is not (raised Christian but not religious now, with no plans to convert.) I'd kind of like us to join a congregation and I want our children to have a Jewish education but worry that most places will make us feel awkward.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:So if you can't afford dues are you not allowed to go to a Jewish temple?

No, if you can't afford it, almost all temples will waive or reduce dues. If you can afford it, but choose to spend money elsewhere, that is a different issue. Someone has to pay for the building, the rabbi, other staff (including Hebrew school teachers), etc. Unlike in most churches, there is no passing the plate to raise funds.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:So if you can't afford dues are you not allowed to go to a Jewish temple?

No, if you can't afford it, almost all temples will waive or reduce dues. If you can afford it, but choose to spend money elsewhere, that is a different issue. Someone has to pay for the building, the rabbi, other staff (including Hebrew school teachers), etc. Unlike in most churches, there is no passing the plate to raise funds.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Another option would be Moed, which is an afterschool program that introduces Hebrew and holiday celebration in a more secular fashion. http://www.moedcommunity.org/. Give your kids a framework, and if they reject it, they reject. Hebrew school has also changed a lot since you were a kid, there is more of an emphasis on fun, modern Hebrew, Israeli/women teachers - it's not like the old Ashke-normative, fusty Hebrew school of yore.

Someone let in a refugee from Jewbook?

Had to google what that is - nope just a Gen X half Sephardic Jewess Hebrew School teacher.


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ok. I only learned the word "ashkenormative" from my millenial kid. We are ashkenazic, but she is what some would call a "social justice warrior" and she integrates that with her Jewish identity in part by speaking up for mizrahi Judaism online.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:So if you can't afford dues are you not allowed to go to a Jewish temple?

No, if you can't afford it, almost all temples will waive or reduce dues. If you can afford it, but choose to spend money elsewhere, that is a different issue. Someone has to pay for the building, the rabbi, other staff (including Hebrew school teachers), etc. Unlike in most churches, there is no passing the plate to raise funds.

Anonymous wrote:So if you can't afford dues are you not allowed to go to a Jewish temple?

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Try Chabad OP. There’s no membership costs and the Hebrew fees are affordable. Best of all, it’s just one Sunday per week for 2 hours— even as they get older.

You’re suggesting Chabad to someone who barely goes to temple? It’s orthodox.

Yes! People make so many assumptions about Chabad that simply aren’t true. Kids who go to Chabad are mostly not observant. I have never felt more accepted and comfortable. We still rarely go to synagogue but our kids are learning Judaism in its most traditional fashion and they can pick and choose what they would like to incorporate in their lives when they are adults and have families of their own.

My son went to a conservative Hebrew school for two years. He hated it, we hated the scene. Felt more like high school than inclusive and welcoming. I thought that hating Hebrew school was a right of passage but it doesn’t have to be. Chabad is genuine, sincere and their teaching techniques are amazing. My kids have learned more Hebrew in one year going once a week than they ever did 2x a week for 2 years.

I would questioin whether Chabad is really Judaism's most traditional fashion on many grounds. from its cult of the rebbe, to its PR/marketing style, to its resistance (along with the rest of Orthodoxy) to evolution in halacha.

Conservative jewish schools and communities have lots of things they need to do to improve. But be aware that Chabad is so passionate because they think what they are doing will bring moshiach, and because they have an essentialist love for other Jews - all Jews (but not non-Jews) are intrinsically holy and love worthy, so your misdeeds can be overlooked. Its admirable, but also creepy. I don't want C Judaism to become like that, even if I want us to be warmer and more welcoming.

I also wonder if you have done anything in your shul to or school to make it better. So much of what I see among people with R or C beliefs who go to chabad, is a preference for a place where everything is done for you (not that there are not lay people helping make chabad communities work, but that is not asked of newcomers from R and C backgrounds, and its not as needed given the way entire chabad shaliach families devote themselves) To make a C shul better takes a lot of hard work, and some people don't want to do that. If anything, my greater admiration goes to the new independent minyan communities, which achieve a lot of the warmth that Chabad manages, without being right wing in theology or politics - but they tend to requite even more volunteer commitment than established C or R communities.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Try Chabad OP. There’s no membership costs and the Hebrew fees are affordable. Best of all, it’s just one Sunday per week for 2 hours— even as they get older.

You’re suggesting Chabad to someone who barely goes to temple? It’s orthodox.

Yes! People make so many assumptions about Chabad that simply aren’t true. Kids who go to Chabad are mostly not observant. I have never felt more accepted and comfortable. We still rarely go to synagogue but our kids are learning Judaism in its most traditional fashion and they can pick and choose what they would like to incorporate in their lives when they are adults and have families of their own.

My son went to a conservative Hebrew school for two years. He hated it, we hated the scene. Felt more like high school than inclusive and welcoming. I thought that hating Hebrew school was a right of passage but it doesn’t have to be. Chabad is genuine, sincere and their teaching techniques are amazing. My kids have learned more Hebrew in one year going once a week than they ever did 2x a week for 2 years.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Another option would be Moed, which is an afterschool program that introduces Hebrew and holiday celebration in a more secular fashion. http://www.moedcommunity.org/. Give your kids a framework, and if they reject it, they reject. Hebrew school has also changed a lot since you were a kid, there is more of an emphasis on fun, modern Hebrew, Israeli/women teachers - it's not like the old Ashke-normative, fusty Hebrew school of yore.

Someone let in a refugee from Jewbook?

Had to google what that is - nope just a Gen X half Sephardic Jewess Hebrew School teacher.


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