Coaches were the bane of my existence for almost 2 decades.

DD (17yrs old) is currently a 16U B Pitcher. She is not super fast but can move the ball.

We have been having problems with coaches since the first year she started playing ten years ago.

Most recently (fall JR year), DD quit SB due to coach abuse, walking off the field during a practice. 2 weeks later the rest of the Varsity starting line-up did the same. I was much encouraged by the validation for DD's decision.

The coach was fired. Good.

DD was demoted to JV by the AD and the Assistant Coach. Bad. DD quit again. That one really hurt.

The AD was fired. The Assistant Coach is now the Head Coach for HS.

DD loves this coach now. Have had a successful travel/club team experience with her and teammates of many years.

SR year is looking good for a positive SB experience.

Being a parent in sports is not easy. That is why so many parents go nuts. IMO.

If the other players notice it, and are speaking about it, then it isn't about character building anymore, but it has slipped into bullying.

Your daughter can choose to stay or choose to go, but no one should pretend this is acceptible.

Regardless of the level of the player, no coach should be a jackass. It does zero for development.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My son had a coach like that. At the end of the season he told my son he is only hard on the kids who have potential. It changed my son’s view on tough coaches.

All the kids playing at the DA level have "potential," otherwise they would not have made a DA team.

Every soccer player has potential, it does depend on the coach being a good trainer and encourage players to take chances. Were foolish to think random strangers can cap our DC potential. We wouldn't accept it from a teacher telling us our son is stupid and not very bright. Basketball needs tall players, football needs strong fast players, soccer can welcome all.

No. Soccer is a sport. To play at a high level you must be athletic, fast, quick, strong, have field/game awareness, technical skill, etc. stop thinking everyone can play soccer at a high level. They can not.

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If you are playing at DA you already have all or nearly all of those attributes.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My son had a coach like that. At the end of the season he told my son he is only hard on the kids who have potential. It changed my son’s view on tough coaches.

All the kids playing at the DA level have "potential," otherwise they would not have made a DA team.

Every soccer player has potential, it does depend on the coach being a good trainer and encourage players to take chances. Were foolish to think random strangers can cap our DC potential. We wouldn't accept it from a teacher telling us our son is stupid and not very bright. Basketball needs tall players, football needs strong fast players, soccer can welcome all.

No. Soccer is a sport. To play at a high level you must be athletic, fast, quick, strong, have field/game awareness, technical skill, etc. stop thinking everyone can play soccer at a high level. They can not.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My son had a coach like that. At the end of the season he told my son he is only hard on the kids who have potential. It changed my son’s view on tough coaches.

All the kids playing at the DA level have "potential," otherwise they would not have made a DA team.

Every soccer player has potential, it does depend on the coach being a good trainer and encourage players to take chances. Were foolish to think random strangers can cap our DC potential. We wouldn't accept it from a teacher telling us our son is stupid and not very bright. Basketball needs tall players, football needs strong fast players, soccer can welcome all.

Thank you all for the input. It's helped a lot, and given me valuable factors to include in deciding what to do.

It's not great but it is a good learning experience and she can use and grow from it. Frankly, that is how most college head coaches treat their younger players. It comes as a shock for a good many players (my kid included) when college practices start and that nice coach from recruiting is now somewhat of a jerk.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My son had a coach like that. At the end of the season he told my son he is only hard on the kids who have potential. It changed my son’s view on tough coaches.

All the kids playing at the DA level have "potential," otherwise they would not have made a DA team.

If they can’t handle criticism from a coach they don’t have the potential to go much further.

There is a difference between constructive crticism mixed with praise and constant negative input with absolutely nothing positive to say and not acknowleding the things a player does right.

+1 There is a world of difference between the two. Or a player being criticized while seeing others favored.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My son had a coach like that. At the end of the season he told my son he is only hard on the kids who have potential. It changed my son’s view on tough coaches.

All the kids playing at the DA level have "potential," otherwise they would not have made a DA team.

If they can’t handle criticism from a coach they don’t have the potential to go much further.

No. Coaches are a mixed bag. Some are good, most are bad. Your statement shows you do not know what you are talking about. This is not about criticism. It’s about breaking the player. At this level of play, the difference is confidence. If it’s a bad fit leave. There is absolutely nothing to be gained by staying with a coach who has it out for you and everything to lose.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My son had a coach like that. At the end of the season he told my son he is only hard on the kids who have potential. It changed my son’s view on tough coaches.

All the kids playing at the DA level have "potential," otherwise they would not have made a DA team.

If they can’t handle criticism from a coach they don’t have the potential to go much further.

There is a difference between constructive crticism mixed with praise and constant negative input with absolutely nothing positive to say and not acknowleding the things a player does right.