Anonymous wrote:Personally I would wait. The travel is stressful enough. But what would really send me over the edge is dealing with my toddler in a new space. They are into everything, and I’d be a wreck in a space that I hadn’t childproofed.

Do you have underlying anxiety issues? My sil sounds a lot like you.

Anonymous wrote:I'd wait for it them to come to you, do lots of FaceTime and Skype, email them lots of pictures and anecdotes about your son, in between now and their visit. And, depending on the nature of your relationship and their financial status, perhaps offer to help pay for their trip since you're not traveling to them.

+1.

Anonymous wrote:We do it once a year and have since our kids were born. The key at that age is to buy a seat, especially if you are going solo. (I would not do a cross-country flight solo with a 17mo if you can't swing the extra seat!) We timed flights to nap windows at that age and kids slept in their car seats most of the flight. I actually find long flights much easier than the two-hour flights, since my kids never settle enough on the short flights to fall asleep for very long.

+1. Definitely get the toddler a seat! We made that mistake last summer when DS was ~18 months old. We had bought the tickets months earlier when he wasn’t very mobile yet and it was a miserable flight. Got him his own seat for Christmas a few months later and it was better although I wouldn’t say he enjoyed it entirely, lol. Now he’s more into watching videos so it would be easier. I’d do a 2hr flight on my own but probably not 6hr. I know people do it all the time but it would be stressful and sometimes the stress is not worth it.

Anonymous wrote:If the grandparents are ambulatory and healthy then why the hell can't they come to you? My parents make the trip because they remember how awful it was to travel with kids. If they want to see them they will come. If they don't come, then they don't want to see them that badly.

Try reading the thread. OP said that the grandparents have traveled to her, she's just not sure when they will be able to travel to her again.

If OP wants to see them more often than they can fly to her, she has to fly to them. And flying with one toddler isn't that bad, and she's almost through the worst time to fly with a baby.

If they can travel, I would probably expect them to. My parents and MIL came to visit DD the first couple times, but I did fly cross country with her to see my grandma.

If they can travel, I would probably expect them to. My parents and MIL came to visit DD the first couple times, but I did fly cross country with her to see my grandma.

If the grandparents are ambulatory and healthy then why the hell can't they come to you? My parents make the trip because they remember how awful it was to travel with kids. If they want to see them they will come. If they don't come, then they don't want to see them that badly.

I just did from DC to Missouri a few weekends ago, our kids are the same age. It was a nightmare and my kid is well behaved - but I was traveling alone and he was just done with sitting in one place and watching UmiZoomi. And that was only a 2.5 hr flight. I would shudder at doing 6 hours on my own. Also there's adjusting time zones if need be, and not having anything baby proofed, sleeping in a pack'n'play, and lack of routine involved with visiting other people.

It was worth it to see my bestie (his godmother) as she hadn't seen him since he was born, but I think no more traveling for awhile - I'll wait on the grandparents if they can.

I have a 21 month old now and it's getting so much easier to travel with her. She finally likes the ipad and can watch a show or play a game whereas I couldn't get her attention even at Christmas time with that stuff in the car. We aren't big into screens at home, so she's pretty obsessed with it on road trips. She also understands me when I tell her where we're going and about flying. It didn't really make sense to her before.

We fly twice a year to the west coast. Every time, I expect the worst and sometimes I am positively surprised. I love our time on the west coast and I always look forward to going. So far, the flights have not deterred me. It's been progressively worse every time though(DC is 18 months now). So, I am really adjusting my expectation for the upcoming trip. If I did not enjoy the west coast so much, there is no way I would put myself through it.

If the grandparents are retired and healthy, I would ask them to make the trip--and point out that he's in a really bad stage for travel right now. Wiggly, climbs everything, not old enough to have a conversation or be distracted much by an ipad.

IME, 9-18 months is the worst time to travel with a kid. As they get older, it gets easier. I'd hold off for a few months, but we flew with our kid all the time, and if you plan and prepare, it's fine.