Anonymous wrote:If that many of the guests attending have kids then that it stupid to not allow children or at least hire a babysitter.

Is the event at a hotel? If so I’d see if you can rent a room and hire babysitters during the event. I know my wedding planner offered this as an option.

But I probably wouldn’t spend thousands of dollars on a trip that not all of my family members can attend.

This. We hired a room and sitter, who came with games, kids had pizza, etc.

Anonymous wrote:I have two kids and love them very much, we had kids at our wedding...I completely understand when a couple doesn’t want kids. It’s their wedding, it’s not about you. Honestly, I love having the excuse to have a kid free night! Bringing my kids means one of us may leave early or keeping them up late and suffering the crankiness the next day, worrying whether or not they’ll like the food served, dealing with my son begging to play on my phone constantly since he’s not much of a socialized.

Exactly to all. And this is why we had a child-free wedding. Bizarre that OP finds this strange.

I have two kids and love them very much, we had kids at our wedding...I completely understand when a couple doesn’t want kids. It’s their wedding, it’s not about you. Honestly, I love having the excuse to have a kid free night! Bringing my kids means one of us may leave early or keeping them up late and suffering the crankiness the next day, worrying whether or not they’ll like the food served, dealing with my son begging to play on my phone constantly since he’s not much of a socialized.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I will never understand why people who hire babysitters so they can go on date nights and out their kids on day care all week get bent out of shape because they can't take their kids along to a wedding for a few hours. Hire a friggin baby sitter. It's not a big deal.

At a hotel? No. Op says a lot of people have to travel.

Yes. Ask people who live locally for recommended baby sitters. Why people think their are entitled to bring kids to their weddings is beyond me. It's bizarre - people leave their kids with baby sitters all the time but for an event like a wedding that just CANT be away from them for four or five hours?

It’s not one event and it’s not just the babysitter. It’s paying for plane tickets for my kids, finding and hiring a nanny for the welcome party and ceremony/ reception- usually kids are invited to the brunch the following day. It’s dragging my kids to another city to just hang out at a hotel.

Their wedding, their choice. Your kids, your choice.

+1. It’s spending thousands to spend a weekend mostly away from your kids. A babysitter at a hotel is typically $25 plus an hour. Not to mention plan tickets for your kids for an event they can’t attend.

I actually understand why they don’t want kids at the wedding but they also need to understand why people may decline to attend.

If that many of the guests attending have kids then that it stupid to not allow children or at least hire a babysitter.

Is the event at a hotel? If so I’d see if you can rent a room and hire babysitters during the event. I know my wedding planner offered this as an option.

But I probably wouldn’t spend thousands of dollars on a trip that not all of my family members can attend.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I will never understand why people who hire babysitters so they can go on date nights and out their kids on day care all week get bent out of shape because they can't take their kids along to a wedding for a few hours. Hire a friggin baby sitter. It's not a big deal.

At a hotel? No. Op says a lot of people have to travel.

Yes. Ask people who live locally for recommended baby sitters. Why people think their are entitled to bring kids to their weddings is beyond me. It's bizarre - people leave their kids with baby sitters all the time but for an event like a wedding that just CANT be away from them for four or five hours?

Completely agree. It’s ludicrous to me that these entitled parents think that the event’s planners should change the plan to accommodate them. It’s so gauche and tacky to even complain. You accept or decline the invite. You don’t get to dictate the terms. Get a life.

When did anyone say this??

It’s not tacky. It’s their wedding and your choice to attend. I love my children and most of my activities outside of work revolves around them. Probably too much. But when we get invited to weddings they stay home. We’ve had relatives come stay here for the weekend so DH and I can have a rare weekend away. We’ve done this even when they were invited to the wedding so we can truly enjoy the weekend. These weddings have not been for close relatives.

I also do not trust most babysitters. Can anyone on your DH’s side come to watch your kids? Our relatives love time to spoil with the children without us home and we enjoy the break.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I will never understand why people who hire babysitters so they can go on date nights and out their kids on day care all week get bent out of shape because they can't take their kids along to a wedding for a few hours. Hire a friggin baby sitter. It's not a big deal.

At a hotel? No. Op says a lot of people have to travel.

Yes. Ask people who live locally for recommended baby sitters. Why people think their are entitled to bring kids to their weddings is beyond me. It's bizarre - people leave their kids with baby sitters all the time but for an event like a wedding that just CANT be away from them for four or five hours?

Because many parents love their children and don’t feel safe leaving their kids with a stranger at a hotel!

OP, if that's what they want, then that's what they want. You or I don't have to understand, support, or agree. It's THEIR wedding.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I will never understand why people who hire babysitters so they can go on date nights and out their kids on day care all week get bent out of shape because they can't take their kids along to a wedding for a few hours. Hire a friggin baby sitter. It's not a big deal.

At a hotel? No. Op says a lot of people have to travel.

Yes. Ask people who live locally for recommended baby sitters. Why people think their are entitled to bring kids to their weddings is beyond me. It's bizarre - people leave their kids with baby sitters all the time but for an event like a wedding that just CANT be away from them for four or five hours?

Completely agree. It’s ludicrous to me that these entitled parents think that the event’s planners should change the plan to accommodate them. It’s so gauche and tacky to even complain. You accept or decline the invite. You don’t get to dictate the terms. Get a life.

Why would it be odd that the couple marrying would want their own children at their wedding but not yours?

I find that wedding guests with kids are particularly entitled.

Anonymous wrote:My cousin is marrying her long time boyfriend. They have two kids (almost 2&5) yet they’ve told all guests no children allowed at wedding or reception. I find this tacky regardless, but especially considering the fact they have children and have been cohabitating for 6+ years.

90% is the family members on both sides are traveling and many of us have children. What the hell do we do with our kids?

This isn't tacky - just inconvient. Decline and keep moving. It isn't even necessary to tell them it is because your kids are not invited, as a PP suggested.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I will never understand why people who hire babysitters so they can go on date nights and out their kids on day care all week get bent out of shape because they can't take their kids along to a wedding for a few hours. Hire a friggin baby sitter. It's not a big deal.

At a hotel? No. Op says a lot of people have to travel.

Yes. Ask people who live locally for recommended baby sitters. Why people think their are entitled to bring kids to their weddings is beyond me. It's bizarre - people leave their kids with baby sitters all the time but for an event like a wedding that just CANT be away from them for four or five hours?

It’s not one event and it’s not just the babysitter. It’s paying for plane tickets for my kids, finding and hiring a nanny for the welcome party and ceremony/ reception- usually kids are invited to the brunch the following day. It’s dragging my kids to another city to just hang out at a hotel.

Their wedding, their choice. Your kids, your choice.

Anonymous wrote:I will never understand why people who hire babysitters so they can go on date nights and out their kids on day care all week get bent out of shape because they can't take their kids along to a wedding for a few hours. Hire a friggin baby sitter. It's not a big deal.

I don’t like using a babysitter I don’t know, for my kids in an unfamiliar place to them - in a hotel.