Most likely you were dropped. But there is a polite way to find out. You live in a condo and can't host a play group but you can host a 1:1 playdate easily. Invite the host and her daughter to come over some day 3-5 pm. Say that your child misses her child and would love her to come over some day 3-5pm and that she can pick the day. If she takes you up on the offer then you were not dropped, they changed the playdate because it was more convenient for more kids/families. If she finds many excuses not to come, you've been dropped and you should find alternate play options for your child that are more convenient time-wise.

Move on, OP. Just take your kid to the local parks and let play happen organically in the moment with other kids.

Learn which parks attract the most kids your child's age at the times you want to go, pack a picnic lunch and a blanket, and go hang out. I found my kids (now teens) learned a lot about just going with the flow, and being able to walk into any group and quickly find their spot. These quiet skills have served them well.

Then again, I found the few mom groups I joined to be so uncomfortably judgmental that it was a relief to walk away and follow my own drummer. Getting away from the mean moms was one of the best decisions I made when my kids were young. Don't be afraid to do your own thing.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I remember your post. Yes, you were dropped.

+1 Your kid is always pushing and grabbing from the host's child, right? Yeah - you have been dropped.

I thought she was dumping out all the stuff on the sensory table when all the other kids the sane age were playing nicely with it. Which would be bad enough. But if she was hitting then it’s even more of a no brainer.

It’s interesting to see the other side, how simply 100% clueless these parents can be. Guess it shows us all that being direct is best in these cases.

OP here. My DD never hit the host child or any child - but she has grabbed toys from her and other kids as well as tried to pull her off a riding toy (I stopped her, of course).

Anonymous wrote:Since it is the spring break holidays, the mother who has a weekly playgroup one afternoon a week, switched to mornings, 10 to 12, even though she knows my DD naps at 11AM. The host mother texted me about the switch and I responded that we couldn't make it because of DD's nap and she just texted back that her daughter will miss my daughter. There are generally five to six kids, all around 2.5, who participate. I'd posted once before that I didn't think the host mother liked my DD (who is spirited and more active than the other kids including the boys). I guess I will wait to see if she moves playgroup back to the afternoons after this week but I really feel bad about this.

Maybe your child would be better behaved at a morning playdate. You should try it out.

This is not necessarily about you. My guess is she is filling what is considered prime activity time for most 2.5 year olds - the morning for the weeks a class isn't in session. Since she is hosting this, her choice. While 3-5 worka, 10-2 probably works even better for most. Perhaps an added benefit is a potential three week break from you spirited child.

Don't take it personally, and even if you are ultimately dropped, try not to take that personally. Not all kids mesh well. Better not to force a bad situation.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I remember your post. Yes, you were dropped.

+1 Your kid is always pushing and grabbing from the host's child, right? Yeah - you have been dropped.

I thought she was dumping out all the stuff on the sensory table when all the other kids the sane age were playing nicely with it. Which would be bad enough. But if she was hitting then it’s even more of a no brainer.

It’s interesting to see the other side, how simply 100% clueless these parents can be. Guess it shows us all that being direct is best in these cases.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Why would you have an afternoon playgroup for 2.5 year olds? Aren’t they napping? Or was it very late afternoon? All of the playgroups we participated in were in the morning. I think that it makes sense to do what is best for the majority.

It used to be 3 to 5. Yeah, some of the kids came later due to naps but the host DD naps from 1 to 3 and was always up or just getting up when we arrived.

3 to 5 is a terrible time for playgroup. It's getting into dinner time, everyone is cranky.

You sound difficult

It may be that you were dropped, but it could also be that mornings work better for the host. By 2.5, most kids are taking afternoon naps, not morning naps, so an afternoon playgroup doesn’t really make sense for that age.

Also, if she wanted to drop you, this was potentially a highly ineffective way to do it. All you’d have to do is decide you’d stay for just the first hour before you headed home for nap time or to push her nap a bit later and then you’d still be coming. If I was trying to drop someone from a playgroup, I’d find something a bit better than that.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I remember your post. Yes, you were dropped.

+1 Your kid is always pushing and grabbing from the host's child, right? Yeah - you have been dropped.

Agree

Anonymous wrote:I remember your post. Yes, you were dropped.

I remember it too and I agree- you were dropped.

Anonymous wrote:I remember your post. Yes, you were dropped.

+1 Your kid is always pushing and grabbing from the host's child, right? Yeah - you have been dropped.

Anonymous wrote:I remember your post. Yes, you were dropped.

+1 Not sure why you’d want to go somewhere where it’s at minimum a bad fit for your parenting style. Find or start another playgroup with all spirited kids. It will probably need to be in a park though.

Anonymous wrote:Why would you have an afternoon playgroup for 2.5 year olds? Aren’t they napping? Or was it very late afternoon? All of the playgroups we participated in were in the morning. I think that it makes sense to do what is best for the majority.

It used to be 3 to 5. Yeah, some of the kids came later due to naps but the host DD naps from 1 to 3 and was always up or just getting up when we arrived.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:2.5 is about the time that many kids start to drop their nap or nap later. 11 am is a pretty early nap for a 2.5 year old. Why don't you just keep your child up later and go to the morning playgroup? I'd think that an afternoon playgroup would be harder for most people and that's why it changed vs. being personal about you.

If it really doesn't work for you, why not start your own playgroup?

I had the "spirited" kid too. It's hard. Sometimes the park is just better for kids that need to run. It's getting warmer now, and the park will be much more tolerable. Kids that age don't really need to "play" with other kids. They still parallel play. It's more for the moms.

OP here. We don't have a yard (live in a condo) nor the room to host a playgroup. I do take DD to the park or an indoor playroom every day. DD is such a bad sleeper that I can't change her nap schedule without meltdowns. My DD asks to for the host DD every day.

She will get over it. She will see the host DD in a year and won't even recognize her. What time does your daughter get up?